I Might Be A Fake Cultivator

The Heavenly Beast Divine Mountain was located slightly south of the central region of the Sinister Spirit Beast Cesspool, and it was the northern part of the territory the Divine Bat Emperor governed over.

At the rate An Lin and the others were traveling, they would get there in less than a day.

“Apparently, the Divine Bat Emperor is still thinking about recovering the Kirin Blood Jade.” Xu Xiaolan chuckled.

“Alright, then let’s give it a chance to exact its revenge!” An Lin raised his head with an expression that was brimming with confidence.

A reminiscent expression appeared on Tina’s face. “Speaking of the Kirin Blood Jade, I wonder how Uncle Dongfang Zhuangshi is going…”

An Lin recalled that simple and honest middle-aged man, and he too sighed with emotion. “I heard from Xiaolan that Dongfang Zhuangshi had already reconstructed a divine body and had recovered his Dao Integration Stage cultivation base, but he had to go and do something and hasn’t been heard from in about a dozen years?”

Tina nodded. “That’s right. He said he was going to get something that should belong to him.”

“Something that should belong to him? What could take him so long to obtain?”

An Lin was a little perplexed.

Tina shook her little head. “I didn’t ask.”

At this moment, in the Heavenly Beast Divine Mountain.

This was one of the five divine mountains of the Sinister Spirit Beast Cesspool, and its outward appearance was quite special. It was over five hundred thousand feet tall and over eight hundred thousand feet wide. From a distance, it looked like a round bowl that tapered down toward the bottom.

The summit of the mountain was like a boundless continent with countless palaces and abodes and was also inhabited by many powerful giant beasts.

Occasionally, one could hear the sounds of violent beasts battling one another.

The Heavenly Beast Divine Mountain was an extremely prestigious divine mountain, and it was also the Divine Bat Emperor’s territory. Even so, battles were still permitted on the mountain.

There was no helping it. The favorite pastime of all Sinister Spirit Beast Cesspool powerful beings was battling. Prohibiting them from fighting was worse than telling them to go and die! As a result, even the Dao Integration Stage Divine Bat Emperor couldn’t prevent these fights from taking place. All it could do was to set up a formation around the Heavenly Beast Divine Mountain, which fortified the divine mountain and kept the damage to a minimum.

A massive blue bat flew over quickly from afar.

Gale-force winds swept for over a hundred kilometers in its wake, sweeping up the wind and clouds.

“Ah! It’s the Divine Bat Emperor!” a flaming mammoth exclaimed with excitement.

“What are you yelling about? Have you never seen an emperor before?” A wind wolf shot a glare at it.

The flaming mammoth instantly exploded with rage. “What? You got a f*cking problem with me?!”

“Shut the f*ck up! I’m trying to take a nap here! Keep making a fuss, and I’ll rip you a new one!” The wind wolf stood up as its wind blade domain began to appear.

“Howl! You think I’ll be scared of you? I’ll crush you right now!” the flaming mammoth roared, and it charged toward the wind wolf, making the earth tremor under its massive weight!

Thus, an earth-shattering battle erupted…

There were many of these battles taking place on the Heavenly Beast Divine Mountain at the same time. It looked like all of these battles had been triggered by the return of the Divine Bat Emperor, but who knew what had actually set them off.

The Divine Bat Emperor was completely used to this, and it flew directly into a cave at the center of the summit of the divine mountain.

The center of the divine mountain was not some glorious palace. Instead, it was a gargantuan cave. There seemed to be another world inside that cave, and it was quite a marvelous spectacle to behold.

Five massive minotaurs over ten thousand feet tall clad in red crystal armor with massive flaming sabers in their hands stood guard at the cave, looking out in five different directions. All of them exuded Return to Void Stage energy fluctuations, and they were all clearly extremely powerful immortal beasts.

A tiny spatial crack appeared above the clouds.

Two figures surreptitiously emerged.

Oh, wait, no, these were two larger figures alongside a tiny little fairy who was blinking her emerald eyes.

“Wow… This is the Heavenly Beast Divine Mountain? It’s like a massive bowl filled with food… ” Tina looked down at the massive, round divine mountain below her, and she clicked her tongue in wonder.

As the Heavenly Court Chef Goddess, Xu Xiaolan nodded in agreement. “The mountain looks like a bowl, the dirt looks like the rice, the lush flora looks like vegetables, all of the lavish palaces look like meat, as for that dark cave in the middle…”

“Black fungus?” Heavenly Court Chef God An Lin suggested.

Xu Xiaolan faltered momentarily before cocking her head to the side with a confused expression. “It doesn’t really look like a black fungus…”

“Not that black fungus. THAT black fungus[1].” An Lin chuckled.

Xu Xiaolan faltered for a few seconds before a blush appeared on her face, and she slapped An Lin on the arm. “You, you’re so shameless! How could you say that?”

Tina was at a complete loss.

“The Divine Bat Emperor must really like entering and exiting that cave.” An Lin nodded with a serious expression.

“Shut up!” Xu Xiaolan slapped An Lin on the arm again as her blush deepened even further.

An Lin chortled with amusement. He felt like Xiaolan was especially adorable now.

If someone else dared to make dirty jokes to Xu Xiaolan, her Dragon Sparrow Sword would have swung down upon them mercilessly already. However, she couldn’t do anything about it now as An Lin was the one making those jokes.

“The Divine Bat Emperor has entered the cave. We should go in too.” Xu Xiaolan tried to change the subject.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. The Heavenly Beast Divine Mountain is the Divine Bat Emperor’s territory. It must be quite familiar with that cave, but we don’t know what potential dangers could be lurking inside…”

An Lin spoke with a cautious expression, “We should wait for it to come out and fly elsewhere first before following it and initiating a surprise attack!”

Xu Xiaolan felt like this was reasonable, and she nodded as all three of them settled down to wait.

One day passed. One of the five minotaurs sneezed once, and that was the only noteworthy event that took place that day.

Two days passed. Three of the five minotaurs sneezed, but nothing else happened.

Ten days passed…

“F*ck it! I ain’t waiting anymore!” The veins on An Lin’s forehead were bulging.

Xu Xiaolan was also getting pissed off. “We should strike now in case something happens if we wait for too long!”

“I’ll listen to whatever Giant An Lin says.” Tina sat on An Lin’s shoulder and hugged An Lin’s neck.

The three of them came to an agreement, and they unleashed the Void Body Mantra to obscure their presence before flying toward the gargantuan cave.

Not only that, but Tina also unleashed a divine technique upon all three of them, which made them blend completely into nature.

Thus, even if a Dao Integration Stage super mighty figure unleashed their divine sense, they would not be able to detect An Lin, Xu Xiaolan, and Tina.

The five powerful minotaur immortal beasts were completely oblivious to the fact that three people had descended from the sky and walked right past them into the inky-black cave they were guarding.

[1] Black fungus is slang for female reproductive organs in Chinese Internet vocabulary.