The Hero Became a Succubus, and the Only Way to Level is to… What?!

When morning came, Kanae awoke in bed under a pile of and surrounded by geriatric goblin men. One of them was already awake and going at it between her legs, swinging his hips with wild abandon. Early sunlight flooded in from an open window. She cursed under her breath for losing track of time. The others back at the inn must be worried.

”I think you’ve had enough.” Kanae lifted the goblin off with her tail and set him aside.

Two goblins rolled off as she sat upright. A quick cast of Prestidigitation cleaned off all the jizz stains matted on her hair and body. Kanae stretched her arms, feeling sufficiently satisfied by last night’s feast. Goblins, for all their sleaziness, did make for good snacks.

”If ya ever need a way into the University, you know where to find us, toots!” An awake goblin slapped Kanae on the ass and winked.

”Thanks, but I have my own way in.” Kanae left as soon as she got dressed, only to run into Edina and Petyr right outside the door.

”Goblins. I knew you fucked languis, but somehow you find new ways to go even lower.” Petyr grimaced.

”H-Hey, guys! I was just coming back… How did you find me?” she asked nervously.

Edina performed a little chitter, and a tiny undead rat crawled up Kanae’s back and onto her shoulder. The tiny critter cocked its skull to one side until the necromancer opened a portal for it to jump into.

”Name a single new city we’ve ever been to that you didn’t immediately look for a fresh fuck in. Zero. I put the little guy on you so we didn’t get lost. I also put one on Claudia,” Edina explained.

”Look, everyone! The succubus brought new babes for an orgy!” a goblin exclaimed from behind her.

As they were climbing out og bed, Kanae slammed the door on the goblins for their own safety. The disgusted high elf was a hair strand away from clobbering the crap out of them.

Before Petyr followed through on any sort of violence, the three of them left the tavern and into the campus block of Ordane University. According to Edina and Petyr, the other two were doing a quick check of the neighborhood around their inn for clues on the Dryoak Consortium. They planned to meet up later whether or not they found something.

Kanae suggested that they investigate the Museum of History and Relics in the meantime. To avoid drawing attention, she, Edina, and Petyr threw cloaks around their shoulders that shrouded most of their bodies. Not only did it protect them from the blistering sun, but they also blended into the crowds.

Ordane’s Rise felt a lot like Highgreen’s Moonlit Avenue, except it was significantly larger here and the people were older in age. History and knowledge flowed like an open textbook. A philosopher preached from one corner of the block, and a professor passed out flyers about his dissertation on another.

”Excuse me!” A centaur lady galloped up to them and just barely caught her glasses from falling off. ”I’m recruiting people for my senior thesis. It’s about inherent classism between individuals who are crowned and those who aren’t. You three look like adventurers! If you’re crowned, could you spare a moment of your time?”

”Uh… We’re kind of busy,” Kanae said, trying to escape her.

The trio turned the other way and ran into an elderly human flagging them down.

”You there, high elf! I’m gathering high elven participants for a study. It’s to find out whether or not their excessive pride and arrogance is a product of upbringing or baked into your very biology. Hells, perhaps the entire race is cursed by some ancient evil!” the man exclaimed.

”Ahahaha! Hey, Petyr. Why don’t you go with this guy? Maybe he can find out why your people are such cunts!” Edina doubled over in laughter.

”I’ll show you evil!” Petyr was about to strangle the guy until Kanae held her back.

”Run away before she kills you!” Kanae charmed him into escaping.

Since the man was old, he didn’t really run away so much as hobble off slowly with a cane in hand. They eventually reached the Museum of History and Relics, but not without being stopped every which way. For an important cultural center, the museum wasn’t as tall or large as the buildings around it. The large domed rooftop, a staple of Saviran architecture, was red rather than the common blue everywhere else.

A signpost had been tacked next to the entrance, warning thieves to stay away and that the penalty for thievery was losing a hand. Kanae shot Edina a look, and the squirreling threw her hands up before stuffing them into pockets.

The museum was open to the public, so Kanae and her companions entered without issue. A few curious scholars did give them the side-eye on the way in though. Right through the entrance, the three stared up in awe at the skeleton of gargantuan sandworm suspended from the rafters. Countless exhibits displayed broken pieces of architecture from an era long past, primitive tools made of wood and stone sat behind glass cases, extinct dire beasts captured and positioned in a remade setting from an expert’s rendition of their period, and more. A stand or placard accompanied most of them, explaining their history and importance.

Kanae stopped in front of a taxidermied dreadmourn. It must not have reached Savir yet that the languis’ demonic ancestor has returned.

”Look at that.” A scholar directed a fellow colleague at a glass display containing a thick skeletal hand. ”They say this is the only known bone belonging to the dwarven race.”

”Fascinating. It says here that they were only a head taller than goblins. A people of stout stature, but as strong as a hobgoblin. What a sight they must have been!” his fellow exclaimed.

A finger on the hand suddenly twitched.

”Good gods! It just moved!”

”What? You’re seeing things. Senility must be getting to you.”

The hand hopped up and stood on its fingers, taking them both by surprise. They gasped hard and stared in disbelief. As the two drew closer, the appendage threw itself into the glass and startled them screaming.

”You’re going to get yourself thrown out of the city…” Kanae sighed.

”What? Don’t tell me you didn’t think that was funny!” Edina laughed.

Petyr had gone missing. They found her inspecting an architectural display of what must have been an old fortification wall. The stonework boasted faded but beautiful and intricate patterns. It was pocked with little holes, including a large crater that had to have come from a cannonball.

”It is believed that after the dwarves, Savir was once the largest empire ever known to this world on the surface. A single dynasty ruled for nearly 5,000 years, but the family’s death led to a power struggle between regional leaders to seize control of the empire. Now most of its glory is buried under hundreds of feet of sand, and the remaining powers have been split into three. How the mighty can fall,” Petyr said about the piece of rubble.

”I didn’t take you for a history buff,” Kanae teased.

”Not that I care about another country’s history, but there is always something to learn from them. For example, a single imperial family cannot rule a vast empire. The leaders in each province or state are the true rulers. Another, to prevent any possibility of a military coup, soldiers must be regularly rotated to new ranked officers. This prevents any would-be upstart general from cultivating loyalists over time.”

”Wow, alright. You know your stuff. Here I am, putting the entire Commonwealth’s army under the leadership of my childhood friend, Manabe. He’s just an orc with no military training or discipline,” she explained.

”It is a wonder how Ortesia lost to you…” the paladin grumbled.

They had enough sight-seeing and went to hail a museum staff member. When Kanae name-dropped Seif and Panner, the man instantly recognized both names and asked them to wait here.

Not a few minutes later, a kobold and human man came out to meet them. Seif, the kobold, and Panner, the human, were dressed in scholarly Saviran robes. Kanae had already reacquainted with the kobold back at The Diamond. Panner’s complexion looked a lot darker than she last remembered, likely due to having returned under the blazing sun of Savir.

”Kanae!” Panner clasped her hand and smiled. ”You’re no longer in-training, but the true Knight of Amethyst now, aren’t you? Thank you for all the help in Faebog. When Seif told me you were in Savir, I couldn’t believe it. I thought our next reunion would be in Radevic again.”

Kanae retracted her hand and folded her arms. ”Unlike you two, I didn’t come to another country to have sex with dryads. Also, Seif— You neglected to tell me that the archaeology guild didn’t disappear entirely. Some are still around. One of them is Sultana Dudula’s right hand man, Archmage Donnu.”

Their eyes snapped open, and each of them slapped a hand over Kanae’s mouth immediately. In retaliation, Petyr grabbed their wrists and lifted them high off their feet.

”Ow, ow, ow! Huh… Maybe my next dissertation should be on the effects of arousal in men around the presence of taller women,” Panner said.

The corner of Petyr’s right eye twitched. She chucked Panner to the ceiling. He landed on the skeletal sandworm, clinging to the rib for dear life.

”You want to make a smart comment, too, lizard?” Petyr snarled.

”I-I’m into lamias…” Seif replied with his tail tucked between his legs.

”Edina, can you bring Panner down? Petyr, let the kobold go,” Kanae ordered.

Once the two scholars were on their feet again, they led Kanae and her companions into a spacious office to speak more privately. The room only had one other exit in which the door was left ajar, leading somewhere like a storage warehouse. Numerous artifacts in the office were in the middle of being cataloged. Research papers were strewn all over the floor, and there was chaos to their organization. Even the most intelligent people could be slobs, it seemed.

”Those goblins were supposed to keep that a secret! This is the last time we employ cheap labor,” Panner groaned.

”Well, now’s your chance to tell us the truth before I force it out of you,” Kanae said, eyes flashing with magical energy.

”I’m sorry, Kanae!” Seif apologized deeply. ”I didn’t tell you because it was for your own safety. Those missing guild members who managed to return? They work under Archmage Donnu as part of his inner circle. We only occasionally receive instructions from them, be it to study an unearthed artifact or determine what underground temple a mining town has chanced upon.”

”You guys know dwarven and cult ruins are being dug up, and Sultana Dudula’s ordering them to be collapsed to rubble, right?” Edina asked.

”What?!” Seif and Panner exploded in utter surprise.

Kanae put a hand to her face and sighed. They might have accidentally spilled a secret that Sultana Dudula was carefully trying to keep on the down low.

”Think of all that history, lost underground!” Seif cried.

”Why? We gain literally nothing. Zilch. Absolutely nada for burying it!” Panner exclaimed.

”Panner! Just last night, one of the headmasters received a letter from the sultana. Something about a mining settlement discovering more ruins. You don’t think they intend to collapse that as well?” the kobold asked.

”Hold up. If you two are thinking about going, I highly advise against it. There might be dwarven sex bots in there that will screw your brains out,” Kanae warned.

They stared at her for all but half a second, then started hastily packing their bags. She slapped a hand to her face again. That was probably the wrong thing to say to these two.

Something crashed in the warehouse. A lot of things crashed from the sound of it. Ceramics shattered. Heavy boxes clattering to the ground. The scholars stopped packing and exchanged worried glances.

”Do you have someone working back there?” Kanae asked.

”No one is allowed in this office except myself and Panner,” Seif explained.

The five of them rushed into the warehouse, a massive room with shelves upon shelves containing ancient treasures and artifacts. Unlike the office, many were organized neatly and arranged in an orderly fashion. Some large statues gathered dust in the corner of the chamber. What caught their attention was a toppled shelf leaning against another. Boxes and broken artifacts littered the ground, having fallen from their place.

Panner’s jaw dropped to the ground, laying eyes on the destruction. He fell to his knees soon after in disbelief.

”Someone’s here!” Petyr shouted and drew her warhammer.

A harpy pushed himself free from the pile, rubbing his head. He had blue plumage and black around the upper chest. Kanae thought she recognized the colors.

”Seven?” Kanae gasped.

Seven whipped around, eyes wide and mouth agape. Kanae expected a tearful reunion like when they departed, the harpy’s demeanor flashed with shame instead. He unfurled his wings and took flight, leaving through a hole in the roof with something in his arms.

”That’s the thief who’s been stealing from us!” Panner exclaimed angrily.

”What an amateur. If it was me, I wouldn’t have gotten caught. Kid needs a lesson on nabbing stuff,” Edina said.

”Kanae, do something!” Seif shook her back to her senses.

Kanae spread her wings and launched out of the ceiling, too. Seven weaved from building to building in Ordane’s Rise, trying to lose her. But she was much faster. Kanae grabbed him from behind, and the two of them plummeted to the ground.

They crashed through a wooden fence and rolled to a stop on a dry, grassy knoll of a park. Seven clutched a cylindrical stone the size of a cup to his chest, groaning in pain.

”Seven! It’s me, Kanae! Why are you stealing? Do Kara and Theena know about this?” Kanae asked.

”I’m stealing because I don’t have any other choice! Theena’s missing and Kara quit adventuring… I’m all that’s left of the group,” Seven said, his voice full of hurt.

”I don’t know what happened to you guys while I was gone, but I’m here now. Whatever’s going on, let me help like old times,” she insisted and extended hand to him.

The harpy boy backed away.

”You can’t! It’s my fault Theena disappeared. I’m the only one who can bring her back… Ahhh! This wouldn’t have happened if the adventurer’s hall didn’t stop Rookies from doing quests anymore! Please, Kanae… just let me go,” Seven pleaded.

”Let me guess. You’re taking whatever you have in your hand with you?” Kanae eyed the item.

He nodded and held it tighter.

”Seven.” Kanae charmed the boy and walked up to him. Instead of scolding him, she brought him into a tender hug. Tears ran down his cheeks. He continued to glance up at her with a pleading look to release him— and she did, much to his surprise. ”We’re friends, aren’t we? We plundered a Necro Lord’s Tomb together! I won’t force you, but when you’re ready to ask for help, I’ll be at the inn in Ordane’s Rise.”

”In that case… Can you find Kara and tell her something for me? Tell her, I’ll find Theena for sure, and that I want to adventure with them again. She’s at a mining town called Ashneedle. I doubt it’s making her a lot of money,” Seven said.

”You got it.” She smiled.

They embraced again, and Kanae ruffled the soft feathers on Seven’s head to a mess. He almost didn’t want to leave, but eventually spread his wings and flew off. The others caught up by the time Seven was long gone. Seif and Panner collapsed to their knees, panting heavily.

”What… happened… to the… thief?” Panner asked.

”I lost him. He was too fast,” Kanae lied.

”What in three hells did the kid steal anyway?” Edina asked.

The scholars shrugged.

”We won’t know until we’ve taken inventory. Some stuff are just mundane artifacts. Others, rare and enchanted items. Kanae, did you catch sight of what it was he took?” Seif asked.

”Cylindrical. Made of stone. May or may not have symbols etched on to it. I didn’t get that good of a look.” Kanae shook her head.

”Sounds familiar… We’re really going to need to take inventory. I suppose that trip to the ruins is out of the question now.” Panner sighed.