The Captain's Dirty Little Secret

Chapter 196: Chapter 196 - Ultimatum

Roxie kept walking.

Zac caught up before she reached the end of the hallway. His hand closed around hers near the trophy cases and stopped her.

Three students stood beside the drinking fountain with an open notebook between them. One looked over.

Zac noticed.

His fingers loosened around Roxie’s hand.

She looked down as he released her.

His hand had been around hers, then it was gone because three people looked over.

It was that easy for him.

So easy.

”What happened in there?” he asked.

Roxie faced him. ”You saw people watching and let go.”

Zac glanced toward the students again. ”We’re still keeping this quiet.”

”I’m not.”

His eyes returned to her face.

The headache and lack of sleep showed in the way he frowned, as though he needed extra time to understand her.

”We said we’d talk after school.”

”I’m talking now.”

”You walked out of lunch.”

”Because girls were sitting all over you.”

”I didn’t invite them.”

”You didn’t tell them to leave.”

”I could barely lift my head. One of them asked if I needed aspirin.”

Roxie folded her arms.

”That was sweet of her.”

Zac closed his eyes and pressed his fingers against his forehead.

”I feel like my skull is splitting open. I sat down, and people came over. That’s all.”

Roxie knew he had not encouraged them. She had watched him shift away from the girl beside him until Dylan blocked him on the other side.

That failed to change what the cafeteria had looked like.

”Everyone in there thinks you’re available,” she said. ”The girls in the bathroom were talking about who should try you next. One of them said I was taking too long.”

Zac’s expression sharpened. ”Who said that?”

”That isn’t the point.”

”It is if you’re planning to hit her.”

”I only told her lunch had started.”

The corner of his mouth moved before the cut stopped it.

Roxie saw the beginning of the smile.

”Don’t.”

”I didn’t say anything.”

”You think it’s funny.”

”I think you scared a bathroom full of girls because one of them mentioned me.”

Roxie stepped closer and lowered her voice.

”They mentioned you because they think you belong to nobody.”

The amusement left his face.

He looked toward the cafeteria doors. Students continued entering and leaving, though nobody came close enough to hear them.

”That was our decision,” he said.

”I changed my mind.”

”You told me that last night.”

”And you said we would talk when you were sober.”

”I am sober.”

”Then answer me.”

Zac leaned back against the trophy case.

The glass rattled softly behind him.

Roxie waited.

His eyes were bloodshot. A thin line of red had formed where his lip had split again. He looked sick, tired, and irritated with himself.

None of that explained why he had spent the entire morning avoiding her.

”You couldn’t even look at me in chemistry,” she said. ”You sat in the back, sent me two messages, then walked out before I could reach you.”

”I felt like shit.”

”You managed to walk with Mason and Dylan.”

”They weren’t waiting for me to decide anything.”

The answer struck harder than he seemed to expect.

Roxie’s arms lowered.

”So that’s why you avoided me.”

Zac rubbed one hand over his face.

”I remembered last night. I showed up drunk and made you explain why you wanted us public while you were still dealing with everything else.”

”Everything with Claire.”

His hand dropped.

”Yes.”

Roxie’s shoulders tightened.

Zac noticed and continued before she could respond.

”I’m not saying you only asked because she died. I know I was wrong to say that last night.”

”But you still thought I might change my mind.”

”I didn’t know.”

”You could have asked.”

”I planned to after school when I could think without wanting to throw up.”

”You decided I needed more time again.”

”I thought both of us needed it.”

Roxie stared at him.

Zac had planned Tennessee because he believed she needed options. He had hidden his split lip because he believed she could not handle the truth. Now he had avoided her because he believed she might regret asking for something she had wanted for months.

He kept making decisions for both of them and calling it care.

”I meant what I said,” she told him.

”I believe you.”

”Then why are we still hiding?”

Zac looked toward the students beside the drinking fountain. They had stopped discussing their notebook. All three were watching the argument now.

He lowered his voice.

”Because yesterday you wanted me hidden, and last night you wanted everyone to know. I needed more than a few hours before we changed everything.”

Roxie almost laughed.

”You chose Tennessee without telling me and expected me to move there. Now holding my hand in school requires careful thought?”

His jaw tightened. ”That’s different.”

”It isn’t to me.”

”Tennessee is my future.”

”And what am I?”

Zac straightened away from the trophy case.

”You know what you are.”

”Everyone else thinks I’m a girl who watches you from across the cafeteria.”

”I never wanted that.”

”You still let go of my hand as soon as someone looked.”

His eyes moved toward the place where their hands had separated.

Roxie had spent months believing secrecy protected them. It protected her position as captain. It kept Bianca from receiving more material to use against her. It allowed Roxie to pretend she could control how deeply Zac entered her life.

Claire had disappeared for more than a month before anyone told Roxie she was dead.

Then she became paperwork, a bag of belongings, and ashes beside the sink.

Roxie was tired of loving people where nobody could see it.

”I told you to go home,” she said. ”I didn’t tell you to leave me.”

Zac’s face tightened.

”You told me to leave the bungalow.”

”For one night. Then you walked out without kissing me, ignored me the next morning, and went to a party because talking to me was harder.”

”I was angry.”

”So was I. I still wanted you to look at me.”

He looked away.

That was the answer she had been waiting for all morning.

Zac had wanted distance because her answer about Tennessee hurt him. He had used their secrecy to create it, then expected Roxie to wait until he felt ready to return.

”You expect me to choose you in Tennessee,” she said. ”I need you to choose me here first.”

His gaze returned to hers.

”I already chose you.”

”Where nobody knows.”

”That was what you wanted.”

”It isn’t anymore.”

Zac released a slow breath.

”What happens if we do this and you change your mind again?”

The question settled between them.

He still needed proof.

After everything he had planned without her, he wanted certainty before taking one visible step toward her.

Roxie stepped back.

”Tomorrow morning, you sit beside me in chemistry. At lunch, you sit with me. You hold my hand where people can see it.”

Zac stared at her.

”Tomorrow?”

”Yes.”

”You’re giving me a deadline?”

”You gave me one for Tennessee every time you asked when I would decide.”

”I never threatened to leave you.”

”You keep asking whether I’ll follow you. You already decided what happens if I don’t.”

”That isn’t true.”

”Then tell me what happens.”

Zac said nothing.

Roxie had her answer.

His future had room for her as long as she entered it the way he planned.

She refused to keep accepting less from him in Briarwick while he demanded everything from her in Tennessee.

”Tomorrow,” she repeated. ”We stop hiding.”

Zac pushed his hood away from his face.

”And if I need more time?”

Roxie’s hands started shaking. She curled them against her palms.

She could take back the deadline. She could give him another day and pretend waiting did not terrify her. But Zac was the one person who still came when she asked. If he decided he wanted distance, there was nothing she could do to stop him.

She loved him.

She had already imagined Tennessee even while arguing against it. She had imagined sitting in an apartment while he returned from practice, finding work nearby, and cheering for him from the stands.

She wanted that future badly enough to fear it.

”Then we break up.”

Zac went completely still.

The hallway continued around them. A locker closed nearby. Someone laughed inside the cafeteria.

His voice came lower when he spoke.

”You don’t mean that.”

”I do.”

”You’re angry.”

”I am.”

”Then stop and think about what you’re saying.”

”I’ve spent months thinking about what happens if people find out. I’m done.”

Zac stepped toward her.

Roxie held her ground.

”Tomorrow, everyone knows I’m your girlfriend, or I’m not your girlfriend anymore.”

His expression emptied.

”Roxie.”

”You wanted me to choose whether I’m part of your future. By tomorrow, you choose whether I’m part of your life now.”

She turned away.

Zac caught her wrist, but his grip lasted only a second.

The same students were still watching.

His hand fell.

Roxie continued down the hallway without looking back.

He had until tomorrow.