The Captain's Dirty Little Secret

Chapter 179: Chapter 179 - Four Hours Away

Coach Miller let them go early.

He watched the team struggle through stretches, two full routines, and enough missed counts to realize nobody wanted to spend the rest of winter break inside the gym.

”That’s enough,” he finally said. ”Go home before you make me regret holding practice.”

Karen grabbed her bag immediately. ”I’ve never respected you more.”

Coach Miller pointed toward the doors. ”Move faster.”

The team scattered before he could change his mind.

Roxie pulled her jacket over her practice clothes and followed Angela and Karen out of the gym. Angela was spending the afternoon with Caleb. Karen claimed she had important plans, which probably meant lying in bed and insulting people through her phone.

They separated near the parking lot.

Roxie walked around the back of the gym.

The old concrete bleachers stood empty beneath the gray afternoon sky. Zac sat on the low stone ledge behind them, half hidden by the bare tree beside it. His hands were tucked inside the pocket of his hoodie.

His truck was nowhere in sight, which meant he had parked at the gas station again.

He looked up when he heard her.

Roxie smiled immediately.

She could no longer help it.

Zac stood as she approached.

Roxie stopped in front of him and looked pointedly at the ledge. ”I don’t appreciate finding someone in my space.”

His mouth curved. ”I missed you too.”

She stepped closer, grabbed the front of his hoodie, and kissed him.

Zac’s hands settled around her waist. The kiss stayed soft, mostly because they were still behind the school and Coach Miller could walk out at any moment. Roxie kissed him once more before resting her forehead against his chest.

His arms tightened around her.

She closed her eyes.

He was warm despite the cold. Being held by him made the soreness in her legs easier to ignore.

”Practice during winter break,” Zac said. ”Coach Miller is getting out of control.”

Roxie pulled back enough to look at him. ”Somebody at Briarwick needs to bring home a State championship.”

Zac pressed one hand over his chest. ”You hurt me.”

”Too soon?”

She tried to look sorry.

The attempt failed when she started giggling.

Zac stared at her for a second before smiling. ”No.”

”You’re sure?”

”I’ll recover.”

”You barely survived Christmas.”

”That was different. You threw me out.”

”I sent you home.”

”Same trauma.”

Roxie rolled her eyes but moved back into his arms.

They stayed beside the bleachers for another minute while the wind moved through the empty field. The school felt strange during winter break. No students crowded the paths. No cars filled the parking lot. The gym doors remained closed behind them.

It almost felt private.

Zac kissed the top of her head. ”Want to walk?”

”Do we have a choice?”

”We need to say hi to Margaret too. She’s probably lonely.”

Roxie laughed. ”You’re getting too attached to that grave.”

”She understands me.”

”She died eighty years before you were born.”

”And she has never judged me.”

”You sit beside her without permission.”

”Margaret likes confidence.”

Zac took her hand.

They followed the path past the school’s football stadium toward the parking lot. When the wind grew colder, Zac pushed their joined hands into the pocket of his hoodie. Roxie stayed close enough that their shoulders bumped with every few steps.

The stadium gates were locked, but the field was visible through the metal fencing.

The turf looked clean and empty. The scoreboard had been turned off. The stands that had once been full of people screaming Zac’s name were silent.

Roxie glanced at him.

He was staring through the fence.

”You miss playing?” she asked.

Zac smiled a little. ”Yeah.”

”That sounded painful.”

”I’m fine.” His eyes remained on the field. ”We go out and play sometimes.”

She already knew.

Zac, Mason, Dylan, and Kyle still met whenever they could get onto a field. They threw the ball around, argued over plays, and acted like none of them were counting how many days had passed since State.

Dylan’s ankle was healing.

Mason still snapped the ball whenever someone asked.

Kyle still hit too hard even when nobody wore pads.

Zac still threw.

Roxie squeezed his hand. ”You could be spending the afternoon with them.”

Zac looked at her quickly. ”I wanted to spend it with you.”

Roxie stopped walking.

He noticed her expression and sighed. ”That came out too correct, didn’t it?”

”A little.”

”I like spending time with you more than I like doing most things.”

She narrowed her eyes. ”Most things?”

”Everything except breathing. I still need that.”

Roxie tried to look unimpressed.

She failed.

Zac smiled and lifted their joined hands to kiss her knuckles.

Roxie looked toward the locked stadium entrance.

”Let’s go check it out.”

Zac glanced at the chain around the gate. ”It’s locked.”

”I can see that.”

”Then what are we checking?”

”I don’t know. Come on.”

She pulled him toward the side of the stadium.

Zac followed without arguing.

A narrow path ran beside the fence where the ground sloped upward. From there, they could see over the lower railing and across the entire field.

Roxie climbed onto the concrete ledge beside the rail.

Her shoe slipped.

Zac caught her around the waist before she could fall.

”Careful.”

”I had it.”

”You almost fell.”

”I would’ve recovered.”

”Because I caught you.”

Roxie turned in his arms. ”Do you need praise?”

”Yes.”

”Congratulations.”

Zac looked unimpressed.

She kissed his cheek.

”That’s better,” he said.

They stood beside the railing with Roxie tucked beneath one of his arms while the empty stadium spread below them.

She could still picture him down there.

Helmet on. Hands ready. Eyes moving over the defense while the whole stadium screamed around him.

She remembered State too.

The final whistle.

The one yard.

His face when he finally let himself cry.

Roxie leaned closer against his side.

Zac looked across the field. ”I’d like you to cheer for me in college too.”

Roxie stopped breathing.

He said it casually, like college was already a place waiting for both of them.

Like she would be there.

Her heartbeat kicked hard.

Zac kept looking at the field for another second before noticing how still she had become.

His arm loosened around her shoulders.

”What?”

Roxie forced air into her lungs. ”Nothing.”

”You froze.”

”It’s cold.”

He studied her face.

The sweat gathering beneath her jacket had nothing to do with the weather.

College.

They had never talked about it.

They talked about State, finals, Christmas, their parents, and their secret. They talked about everything happening now because now was already difficult enough.

They had never talked about where they would be after graduation.

Zac had scouts, coaches, records, and parents who had probably planned his future before he learned how to throw a football.

Roxie had a scholarship keeping her at Briarwick, a house she could barely afford to maintain, and no clear idea what happened after senior year.

College meant applications she had barely started.

Fees she did not have.

Tuition.

Leaving the house unattended.

Leaving Briarwick.

Maybe leaving Zac.

Her stomach tightened.

Zac’s hand moved slowly over her arm. ”Hey.”

Roxie looked through the railing instead of at him.

He seemed to realize he had touched something she was unprepared to discuss.

”I talked to someone in Tennessee,” he said.

Her heart started pounding harder.

That was supposed to help?

”Tennessee,” she repeated.

”A coach contacted Hayes after State. We talked a few days ago.”

Roxie nodded as if this were normal information.

Tennessee was four hours away.

She knew because her mind calculated the distance immediately.

Four hours there.

Four hours back.

Eight hours between seeing him and returning home.

Too far for an afternoon.

Too far for a hidden truck at the gas station.

Too far for cemetery walks after practice.

Zac watched her carefully. ”It’s only four hours.”

Only.

Roxie wrapped both hands around the cold railing.

”That’s great,” she said.

Her voice sounded wrong.

Zac noticed.

”Roxie.”

”What?”

”You look like you’re about to be sick.”

”I’m tired.”

”That’s twice you’ve lied in one minute.”

She finally looked at him.

The excitement had left his face. Worry had replaced it.

Roxie hated that.

This was good news for him.

A college wanted him.

Football was offering him something beyond the one yard line.

She should have been happy.

She was happy.

The panic was there too, pressing against the happiness until she could barely separate them.

”When would you go?” she asked.

”I don’t know. Nothing’s decided.” Zac leaned against the railing beside her. ”It was one conversation.”

”Do your parents know?”

”No.” The answer came quickly. ”You know how they are.”

Zac looked back at the field.

The wind moved across the empty stadium.

Roxie’s hands had gone numb against the railing.

Zac reached for her hand. ”What’s wrong?”

”Nothing is wrong.”

”Roxie.”

She released the metal and forced herself to face him.

”This is great,” she said. ”Tennessee, I mean. A coach talked to you. That’s what you wanted.”

His eyebrows pulled together.

Roxie could feel herself making the conversation worse, but she could not find the right words to stop.

Four hours was probably close to him.

Four hours to Roxie meant gas money, missed shifts, and a house left empty.

Distance she could not fix by walking faster.

Zac touched her wrist. ”Where are you applying?”

Her whole body went cold.

There it was.

The question she had avoided since senior year began.

The question teachers asked while handing her college brochures.

The question Angela and Karen answered with lists.

The question Roxie kept pushing aside because surviving the current month already took everything she had.

She pulled her wrist gently from his hand.

”I don’t know.”

Zac looked surprised. ”You haven’t decided?”

”No.”

”But you’re applying somewhere, right?”

Roxie looked back at the empty field.

A few minutes ago, she had been laughing in his arms.

Now graduation stood directly in front of them.

”I’m not ready to talk about this,” she said.

Zac stayed quiet.

Roxie’s heart kept pounding.

He stepped closer but stopped before touching her.

”I wasn’t trying to pressure you.”

”I know.”

”I just thought...”

”What?”

His eyes moved over her face.

”I thought you’d be wherever I went.”

The words hurt more than they should have.

Because he had said them like it was simple.

Like wanting the same thing would be enough to make it happen.

Roxie looked down.

”I don’t even know if I can go anywhere,” she said.

Zac’s expression changed.

”What do you mean?”

She immediately regretted saying it.

”I said I’m not ready.”

”Okay.”

He answered quickly this time.

Zac rested his elbows against the railing and looked at the field again. Roxie stood beside him, close enough that their sleeves touched.

Tennessee was four hours away.

Roxie had no application, no money, and no plan she trusted.

Graduation was coming whether either of them was ready or not.