The Captain's Dirty Little Secret

Chapter 41: Chapter 41 - Friends

They walked toward the parking lot in silence.

The carnival kept roaring behind them, with music blasting near the rides, a kid crying by the duck pond game, and someone screaming from the Ferris wheel like making noise was a personality.

Roxie kept her eyes forward.

Zac walked beside her with blood drying near the corner of his mouth and his jacket still around her shoulders.

She hated that she noticed the jacket, and she hated that he looked way too aware of it.

”You could’ve gone with him,” Zac said.

Roxie slowed down. ”What?”

”Ethan.”

She let out a tired breath. ”We’re doing this again?”

”No.”

”Then why are you talking?”

They walked a few more steps before Zac spoke again, quieter this time.

”He asked you to go.”

Roxie looked at him.

His hair was messy from the fight, his knuckles were red, and he stared ahead like the words had slipped out before he could stop them.

”So?”

”You stayed.”

Her stomach tightened.

The parking lot was still ahead, bright under yellow lights. People moved in groups around them, laughing, whispering, and pretending they were not watching.

A girl from junior year looked straight at Roxie, then glanced at Zac’s jacket on her shoulders.

Roxie’s jaw tightened.

Absolutely not.

She grabbed Zac’s wrist and pulled him toward the darker side path near the trees.

Zac stumbled half a step. ”Where are we going?”

”Away from people with cameras.”

”Roxie—”

”Walk.”

He walked.

The carnival lights thinned as they moved past the last food truck. The grass turned uneven under her shoes, and the music faded into a muffled beat behind them. The trees at the edge of the park blocked most of the crowd, but voices still carried through the dark.

Roxie stopped near a wide tree and let go of him.

Zac looked down at his wrist, then at her. ”You dragged me into the trees.”

”Do not make that sound weird.”

”I didn’t.”

”You were about to.”

Zac stared at her, then looked away.

She crossed her arms, then remembered she was still wearing his jacket.

Zac’s eyes dropped to it.

Something shifted in his face. It was small, but she saw it. The sight of her wrapped in his jacket hit his ego, and the fact that he tried to hide it made it more annoying.

Roxie pulled it tighter around herself before she could stop it.

”You stayed,” he said again.

”Because the police were coming.”

”You told him to go.”

”Yes, because the police were coming. Are you even listening?”

”And you pulled me away.”

”Because you were standing there like you wanted to get arrested.”

”Roxie.”

”What?”

He stepped closer.

She stepped back without thinking, and her shoulder hit the tree.

Zac stopped.

For a moment, neither of them moved.

The carnival lights flashed behind him through the branches, sending red, gold, and blue across his face, but his eyes stayed on her.

”What do you want me to say?” she asked.

”I don’t know.”

”That’s helpful.”

”I don’t know,” he repeated, sharper now. ”I’m trying to figure out why I feel crazy.”

Roxie blinked. ”You punched someone, and I’m the crazy part of tonight?”

”I didn’t say you were crazy.”

”You implied it.”

”I said I feel crazy.”

”Then maybe stop acting crazy.”

His jaw tightened. ”See, this is what you do.”

”What do I do?”

”You make it sound like I made all of it up.”

”All of what?”

Zac let out a short breath through his nose and dragged a hand through his hair.

”That,” he said.

”That is still not an answer.”

”You pull me away from cops. You wear my jacket. You look at me like—”

”Like what?”

He stopped.

Roxie hated that he stopped.

His eyes moved over her face, and the silence pressed too hard.

”Like that,” he said.

Her face heated. ”That is not a sentence.”

”It’s the only one I’ve got.”

”Maybe stop turning every normal thing into something else.”

”Normal?” His eyes dropped to her hands again. ”You’re giving me just enough attention to make me come running to you.”

She loosened her grip immediately.

His gaze came back to hers.

”You make me sound like I’m manipulating you.”

His expression shifted.

”I didn’t say that.”

”You didn’t have to.”

”Then what is it?”

”I don’t know.”

”That’s convenient.”

Roxie’s anger flared. ”No, what’s convenient is you getting jealous, starting a fight, then acting like I owe you some big answer because your feelings got bruised.”

His eyes hardened. ”You think that’s all this is?”

”I think you want me to say something.”

”I do.”

”At least you admit it.”

”I want you to stop acting like nothing is happening.”

She opened her mouth, then closed it.

That was worse.

Because something was happening.

It had been happening for days, maybe weeks, and she knew that. She was not stupid. She knew when she looked at him too long. She knew when she stayed near him longer than she needed to. She knew when she said leave but waited to see if he would.

Knowing that did not mean she wanted him saying it out loud in the dark while everyone at the carnival was one bad rumor away from ruining her Monday.

”I don’t owe you that,” she said.

”No,” Zac said, his voice rough. ”You don’t.”

The way he agreed made her chest tighten.

He looked away again, jaw working hard, then looked back at her.

”But stop acting like I’m stupid for seeing it.”

Roxie stared at him.

The music behind them kept pounding from the carnival. Someone laughed near the food trucks. A group passed somewhere behind the trees, their voices loud and curious.

Roxie lowered her voice. ”You made a scene.”

”I know.”

”You embarrassed me.”

”I know.”

”You scared me.”

That one slipped out.

Zac’s face changed.

Roxie hated herself immediately.

That was not where she meant to go.

She was supposed to stay angry. Angry made sense. Angry had structure. Angry did not stand there wearing his jacket and saying honest things by accident.

”I scare you?” he asked. He stepped back, hands going to his head. ”Fuck this, Roxie. I feel insane.”

”Don’t you dare shout at me.”

”I’m not.” He sighed looked at her. ”I just want to know why you chose me instead of him.”

”I didn’t choose you—”

”We’re back again here. You insisting I make up things.”

”You are!”

”Then tell me what I got wrong.”

”I don’t have to.” Roxie lifted her chin, even though she could feel herself losing the argument and making less sense with every second. ”I never said we were anything more than friends, Zac.”

Zac looked away for a second and laughed without humor. ”See? This is why I’m losing my mind.”

”Oh, poor Zac.”

”I’m serious.”

”So am I.”

”Then tell me what I’m supposed to think,” he said.

”That you got into a fight, made a mess, and now you’re looking for someone else to blame.”

”I’m not blaming you.”

”You kind of are.”

”I’m asking why you stayed.”

”Because you were bleeding.”

”You could’ve gone with Ethan.”

”I didn’t.”

”That’s my point.”

”Well, your point is stupid.”

Zac stepped toward her, and Roxie’s shoulder pressed harder against the tree before she could stop herself from moving back.

”Friends don’t do this,” he said.

She swallowed. ”Do what?”

His eyes dropped to the jacket wrapped around her shoulders before coming back to her face. ”This. Whatever this is.”

”Friends can wear jackets.”

”Sure.”

”Friends can care if someone gets arrested.”

”Sure.”

”Friends can stop friends from acting like idiots in public.”

”Roxie.”

Her mouth shut because the way he said her name made every argument she had lined up feel weaker.

Zac’s voice dropped. ”Look at me and tell me that’s all this is.”

”We’re friends.”

Roxie hated that she could see the frustration on his face. She hated that she understood it. She hated more that some part of her knew she was only throwing words at him because the truth was standing too close.

”Friends?” he asked.

”Yes.”

He stepped toward her, and his right hand came up beside her head, bracing against the tree. He leaned down, eyes locked on hers. ”Say it again.”

Roxie looked away immediately.

She could not take his eyes like that.

”Friends,” she repeated, weaker this time.

Zac’s hand caught her chin and turned her face back to him. His touch was firm, but careful enough that she could pull away.

She did not.

”We both know that’s not true,” he said.

Her pulse jumped.

”You said you accepted it.”

”I said a lot of things.”

”I told you to take friendship or get out of my life.”

Zac went quiet.

For one second, Roxie felt like she had won.

There.

That was the line.

That was the wall.

If he did not like it, he could leave. They could go back to being strangers. He could stop looking for her in hallways, stop showing up when she was already one bad decision away from losing her mind, stop making her feel like every boring part of her day had been waiting for him to ruin it.

She lifted her chin.

”You’re so conceited,” she said. ”You think everyone likes you.”

His eyes sharpened. ”Right. How stupid of me.”

”Exactly.”

”Thinking the cheer captain might actually like me.”

Her jaw tightened. ”I don’t.”

”Sure.”

”I don’t.”

”Say it properly then.”

Roxie’s heart hit hard.

He was close enough that her thoughts started tripping over each other. The blood at the corner of his mouth had dried darker, and his eyes were fixed on her like he already knew she could not do it.

She hated that.

She hated him.

At least, she needed to.

”To tell you the truth,” she said, voice tight, ”I hate you.”

Zac leaned closer.

”You hate me?”

The question came quiet.

Roxie opened her mouth.

This was it.

One word and it would be over.

If she said yes, really said it, he would probably believe her. Maybe not tonight. Maybe not immediately, because Zac Prescott was stubborn and arrogant and impossible. But eventually, he would.

He would leave her alone.

No more Zac waiting outside gyms.

No more Zac in Chemistry.

No more Zac looking at her like he saw the parts she spent all day hiding.

No more Zac.

Her chest tightened so fast it scared her.

She almost nodded because nodding felt easier than saying it.

Zac caught her chin before she could.

His thumb pressed lightly under her jaw, keeping her there, keeping her eyes on him.

”That’s what I thought,” he said.

Roxie’s breath caught.

”Zac—”

”If I kiss you right now,” he said, voice low, ”you’d probably hate me more.”

Her eyes dropped to his mouth.

The split in his lip was still red. His breath touched her face. His hand was still against the tree beside her head, and she had no idea when he had gotten this close.

”Probably,” she breathed.

Her face burned the second the word left her mouth.

Zac’s gaze moved to her lips, then back to her eyes.

His head lowered toward hers.

Roxie’s heart slammed hard enough to make her dizzy.

She should have shoved him back.

She stayed there instead.

His hand held her chin, not hard, just enough to keep her looking at him.

”Tell me to stop,” he said quietly.

Roxie’s throat tightened.

She said nothing.

Zac leaned in anyway, slow enough to give her one last chance.

His mouth was only a breath away from hers when the whole world seemed to stop.