The Yellow-Haired Villain in Soaring Phoenix's Novels Also Desires Happiness

The person in the mirror, although wearing an extremely ill-fitting white shirt and boxer shorts, still couldn’t hide her stunning beauty and enchanting figure. Her long wavy blond hair flowed down like endless wheat fields.

Only... this woman looked a little familiar...

“Wait? Is that me?!”

Muen suddenly realized, and then froze even more.

What the hell?

Now what?

What am I supposed to do?

How did I suddenly turn into a woman?

After a brief triple existential crisis, Muen instinctively reached out and groped those big, perfectly shaped breasts that could easily stir up endless male fantasies.

Hm... the sensation was quite nice.

However, there was no actual feeling from the chest—it felt like... two water balloons hanging off his chest?

“As expected... they’re fake?”

Muen couldn’t help but breathe a sigh of relief.

In this over-the-top protagonist fantasy world, suddenly turning into a woman was terrifying. It basically meant being forced down the path of feminization and becoming part of the original main character’s harem.

Just imagining himself prettily dressed up, wearing beautiful makeup, fighting for favor in Ariel’s harem... ugh. Even chaos demons would shudder at the thought. Harem lovers and yuri fans alike would fall into silence.

“So... this is the potion’s effect? Just turning into a woman on the outside?”

Muen rubbed his chin in thought:

“That’s why it didn’t work on senior.”

Thinking that, Muen felt a wave of gratitude.

Thank goodness the potion took a while to activate and he transformed like this inside his dorm. If it had happened right in front of senior, with her little-devil personality, she probably would’ve immediately dragged him into a full-on makeup and costume transformation party.

Just imagining senior approaching with a naughty wolf-like grin and a lacy dress in hand made Muen shudder.

“Looks like morning practice is off the table for now. I’ll go back to bed for a while.”

Judging from how slow the potion worked, it would take some time to wear off, so Muen decided to catch a bit more sleep.

At least the fear of that prophetic dream had been diluted by this unexpected twist.

“So many things have already happened—there’s no way something even more outrageous could happen next, right?”

...

...

“Rayne, don’t tell me... you’ve never once been liked by a girl your whole life?”

In the darkness of his room, Rayne sat silently in contemplation.

Even though so much time had passed, Muen Campbell’s words still echoed in his mind.

Like a curse, they woke him up in the middle of the night, leaving him sleepless.

But—

“That’s all in the past!”

Rayne lifted his head, his eyes burning in the dark.

“You ask why—because I’ve already found my true love!”

As he spoke, he stood up and opened the wardrobe in front of him.

Inside the wardrobe... was nothing but underwear.

Rows and rows, stacked high, in countless styles... of men’s underwear!

Rayne picked one up, face full of rapture.

“The great God of Love has taught me what true love really is.”

“Therefore, I no longer need those so-called women.”

“Don’t need them!”

Rayne shouted fanatically, then slammed the wardrobe shut and layered it with multiple locks.

Finally, he stepped out of the room.

Outside, several muscular men were already waiting in silence.

“Let’s go.”

Rayne said:

“I’ll take you to find Muen Campbell.”

...

...

Boom!

Muen had just gotten into bed—his blanket not even warmed—when a loud explosion rang out in the distance.

“What the hell was that?”

Muen jolted upright and stared in horror out the window.

Enemy invasion?

No no no.

The enemy invasion event wasn’t supposed to happen for another month!

“It was thunder. Definitely just thunder.”

Even though the weather outside was perfectly clear, with stars visible in the sky, Muen forced himself to believe it was thunder.

His month of peaceful life hadn’t even started yet.

There’s no way it could be over already!

Muen nodded forcefully, trying to convince himself.

Then wrapped himself back in the blanket and lay down again...

Yeah right—sleep my ass!

That was obviously an explosion on campus.

And judging from the direction—it came from the faculty dorms!

The faculty dorms were home to a bunch of powerful people, and many professors lived there too. Who the hell would start an attack there—that’s like going straight for hell difficulty mode!

Muen rolled out of bed and decided he had to at least put some clothes on. His current outfit—shirt and boxer shorts—paired with his current appearance of a big-boobed cutie... if someone saw him—

BOOM!

Another explosion.

This time much closer.

So close that flying wood chips and stone fragments whizzed right past the tip of Muen’s nose.

“Holy sh—”

Looking at the door to his room that had just been blasted open, Muen didn’t even have time to fully process his shock and rage before the next scene paralyzed him.

—From the smoke-filled hallway, a horde of thong-clad musclemen surged in.

All of them were bald, muscular like wild bulls, their oiled skin gleaming under the dim lights with an unnatural shine.

Bulgaria.

King.

Mm-hmm.

♂

Random, inexplicable words popped into Muen’s head.

If it were just one muscleman in front of him, Muen might’ve been able to appreciate him like a bodybuilder champion.

But so many at once...

Muen’s eyes literally started to hurt.

What the hell is this?!

A fitness instructors’ underground convention?

“Is this the place?”

The musclemen were clearly trained.

They moved quickly, silently, and efficiently.

Once inside the modest single dorm room, they immediately sealed off all exits, giving whoever was inside no way to escape.

Then, a particularly huge muscleman entered—so tall he had to duck to get through the hole left by the explosion. He swept the room with a cold gaze.

When his eyes passed over Muen, they flickered for a moment, but quickly moved on, searching elsewhere.

Not finding who he wanted, the High Priest frowned in dissatisfaction and asked the man beside him:

“Wasn’t this supposed to be Muen Campbell’s room? Where is he?”

“This is definitely Muen Campbell’s room.”

The only muscleman wearing clothes scratched his head in confusion.

The moment Muen saw him, his eyes widened.

Rayne?!

Why is he here?

Oh—wait, he actually fits in disturbingly well with this group of musclemen.

But that wasn’t the issue. The real problem was...

Their target... seemed to be me?

But because of the potion, they apparently hadn’t realized I was me?

“I don’t care if it’s right or not—where the hell is he?”

The High Priest once again swept his gaze across the not-so-large room, not even sparing the dark corners, but still, having failed to find the target he was searching for, he furiously pointed at Muen.

“Besides this blonde beauty, you tell me—where is there even a shadow of Muen Campbell in this room?”

“But...”

Rayne still wore a confused expression.

This really was dorm room 526.

It was on the same floor. How could he have gotten it wrong?

He turned to look at Muen.

His eyes swept over the unfamiliar blonde beauty, then paused for a moment, and as if realizing something, an expression of sudden understanding appeared on his face.

Muen instinctively tensed up inside.

Could it be that he figured out...

“I get it now!”

Rayne slapped his thigh.

“That Muen Campbell is a playboy, so this woman must be his girlfriend! She must know where Muen Campbell is!”

“Is that so?”

“That’s right, it has to be.”

As he spoke, his expression immediately turned sinister.

“To secretly bring a girlfriend back to the dorm—how shameless... how immoral! Such conduct that corrupts public morals—what regard does he have for school rules?”

So bringing a horde of naked men into the dorm doesn’t violate school rules, huh?

Muen couldn’t help but roast him in his mind, then froze.

Bringing men into a men’s dorm... actually really didn’t violate any school rules.

...

“I see.”

The High Priest nodded, as if accepting Rayne’s explanation.

Then he turned around and looked at Muen.

Clearly, there were several meters between them, but instead of approaching, he simply asked coldly:

“This beautiful lady, would you please tell me where Muen Campbell is?”

Muen curled his lips at the oddity of conversing from so far away, then lowered his voice, imitating a woman’s tone, forced a smile, and said:

“Um... I... I don’t knooow~”

“You don’t know? But aren’t you his girlfriend? He couldn’t have left his girlfriend alone in the dorm, could he?”

“I’m not his girlfriend! I’m... I’m...”

Muen’s thoughts raced, then he explained, “I’m his cousin. I’m just staying temporarily in his dorm for the night, so I don’t know where he’s off fooling around.”

“That’s strange.”

Rayne frowned.

“Doesn’t the Campbell family pass down a single heir each generation? Where would Muen Campbell get a cousin from?”

“...”

Shit, has the Campbell bloodline’s thin numbers become that well-known?!

Muen’s mouth twitched slightly, then quickly corrected himself:

“Cousin. I meant cousin. I just enrolled at Saint Maria this year. I’m just a fresh little first-year, so it’s normal nobody knows me yet.”

“I see.”

The High Priest nodded and didn’t seem to doubt Muen’s explanation.

After all, the blonde beauty in front of him did somewhat resemble the Muen Campbell from the portrait.

Compared to “girlfriend,” “cousin” did seem more believable.

“But since she’s a cousin...”

The High Priest’s expression turned cold again.

“She might come in handy to make Muen Campbell surrender when the time comes. You, go tie her up for me.”

“Yes, sir!”

Rayne received the order and, holding a coil of hemp rope, began walking toward Muen.

Muen’s breath hitched slightly.

He quietly moved his hand behind his back, gripping a fruit knife he had sneakily picked up from the desk earlier.

Should I attack, should I attack, should I attack...

Although the odds of beating a dozen muscle bros were low, to just surrender like this... wouldn’t that be—

“Hm?”

Caught in this internal struggle, Muen tilted his head slightly, a puzzled expression flickering across his face.

Because Rayne didn’t come forward to tie him up right away—instead, he walked back and forth in front of Muen holding the rope, as if hesitating about something.

His gaze occasionally drifted across Muen’s body—especially across those two prominent curves made even more obvious by the tension of the shirt buttons.

The meaty face of his immediately turned a little red.

“Um...”

Rayne scratched his head, then turned to the High Priest with an awkward look.

“High Priest, I’ve never touched a girl before... I heard girls’ bodies are really soft... What if I use too much force and she breaks?”

So you’re some kind of innocent BOY now? The kind that blushes just from seeing a girl?!

Muen stared, dumbfounded by Rayne’s bashful words.

But that wasn’t even the end.

That cold-blooded High Priest, the one who looked like he wouldn’t flinch even if rivers of blood flowed before him, actually blushed too after hearing that.

“I’ve never touched a girl either, so I don’t know.”

Muen: “...”

What kind of organization are you people?

The Innocent Boys Mutual Support Society?

Wake up! Innocent boys being with innocent boys will never help you gain experience with women. You’ll just stay single forever!

“So what do we do?” Rayne asked.

The High Priest frowned and looked around.

“Has anyone here ever had contact with a girl?”

“No.”

All the muscle men shook their heads in unison.

Are you kidding? Just touching a cow already violates the doctrine and gets you burned to death. How could they possibly have touched a woman?

Besides, in the so-called Church of True Love, all one needs is beer, dumbbells, and the sweat and moans of men to survive.

Where would women even fit into that?

“Let me do it.”

At that moment—like a savior who appears whenever the world is about to end—

One particularly young-looking muscle man stepped forward.

He pulled out a pair of shackles, and with a solemn look like a soldier heading to the battlefield after swearing “I’ll go home and get married after this war,” he approached.

All the muscle men watched him silently, as though witnessing the birth of a hero.

Even the High Priest couldn’t help but show a look of admiration.

With such a self-sacrificing member, how could the Church of True Love not thrive?

The young muscle man walked toward Muen.

Muen glanced at the shackles in his hand, then, after a moment of thought, gave up the idea of resisting.

He hid the fruit knife behind his boxer shorts and obediently extended his hands.

The young muscle man held his breath, carefully locking the shackles around Muen’s wrists.

But no matter how carefully he moved, it was impossible to avoid touching Muen’s hands.

Touching what he believed to be a woman’s hands.

And so—

Like someone had spilled a bucket of red dye over his head, his face instantly turned red all the way to his neck.

His heart pounded violently in his chest, like a husky finally let out after being cooped up indoors for a month.

Even Muen could clearly hear the sound of his heartbeat.

“I...”

The # Nоvеlight # young muscle man stumbled back a few steps, clutching his chest, dazed by the softness still lingering on his fingertips.

After a brief hesitation, he looked into Muen’s face and spoke in a trembling voice:

“Mom... I think I’m in love.”

...Fuck.

Fall in love my ass. You’re just shy because you’ve never touched a girl before!

Muen didn’t even know how to roast this anymore.

Fall in love from just touching hands—what are you, an elementary school kid?!

Should I just—

The next moment—

Before Muen could finish his roast, his eyes widened in shock.

Because right before him, blood sprayed through the air.

That young muscle man, whose face still carried traces of shyness and confusion, suddenly—under Muen’s disbelieving gaze—had his head chopped off.

So sudden.

The scalding blood splattered all over Muen’s face, dyeing his white shirt with fierce red blotches.

The young man’s head rolled to Muen’s feet, his eyes still wide open, refusing to rest in peace.

The High Priest retracted his chilling blade, smirking coldly.

“Yet another dog who violated the holy doctrine.”

Gurgle gurgle...

Just as the High Priest finished speaking, the young muscle man’s corpse suddenly began to squirm. That flesh, as if it had gained its own consciousness, broke away from the bones and skin that once bound it, twisting and writhing. Vague shapes of internal organs and tendons could be seen, yet it all slithered like countless worms, crawling up the High Priest’s body.

Then—

It burrowed into the thick scripture held in the High Priest’s hand.

From within the scripture came faint, pleased moans of it drinking flesh and blood.

And in less than ten seconds, what remained before Muen was a skeleton wrapped in dried, shriveled skin.

Muen went ice cold all over.

At that moment, he once again sensed that bone-chillingly familiar aura coming from the scripture.

And he finally understood why these muscle-bound men who had appeared out of nowhere had specifically named him as their target.

Because they were followers of that Love God.

That corrupted Love God whom Muen had just recently humiliated, slapped in the face, shattered to ashes, and sent off with the full “one-stop” service package.

You could say the grudge between them was now worse than if Muen had cursed out the Love God’s nonexistent horse.

Although the Evil God had no horse, it was certain He desperately wanted Muen dead. Otherwise, He wouldn’t have spent two precious seconds just to learn human language and curse him before leaving.

Muen knew exactly how serious the consequences were once you got targeted by an Evil God.

He’d been preparing for this the whole time.

But he hadn’t expected...

That revenge would come this fast aaaaaaaah!!!

According to standard storytelling logic, after the protagonist offends the villain, the villain is supposed to leave him some time to grow in secret, right? Otherwise, wouldn’t the villain just squash the protagonist in one slap? How would the story even progress?

But it’s only been a few days! Not even half a month!

Does your troublemaking spirit know no bounds?!

—Oh, right. He’s not the protagonist. Then never mind.

“Hmm? Why do you look so scared?”

The High Priest looked at Muen, puzzled.

“Be... because someone just died right in front of me.”

Muen struggled to control his trembling legs, forcing out a smile uglier than a cry.

“For a delicate little girl like me, isn’t that scary?”

“...I see.”

The High Priest stroked his chin thoughtfully.

“I don’t know much about women. Are women really such fragile creatures?”

Normal men are that fragile too, you bastard!

If I hadn’t already seen Ailuka’s transformation, I might’ve been on my knees by now!

Muen kept flashing his “I’m so weak please ignore me” smile at the towering High Priest while slowly backing away.

Don’t panic, Muen. Don’t panic yet.

People corrupted by the Love God usually don’t think straight.

Their twisted affection eats away most of their reason. So for now, these muscle men probably haven’t figured out he’s Muen.

Just hold steady—then look for a chance to slip away.

Even if he couldn’t escape being surrounded by all these muscle daddies, this was St. Maria Academy! If he could stall long enough, someone would definitely come to his rescue!

“Then let’s continue.”

The High Priest closed his scripture and shouted an order to the surrounding muscle men.

“We must find that blasphemer Muen Campbell and offer him as a sacrifice to the Great God of Love!”

“To the Great God of Love!”

The muscle men roared back fanatically, seeming not to care at all that their comrade had just been devoured into something unknown.

......

......

“Wait, this isn’t the kind of waiting-for-rescue I wanted!”

On the rooftop of the dormitory building, the wind howled violently.

Muen wore a look of despair, with the High Priest pressing a blade to his back, forcing him to stand on the edge of the railing.

Below, the dormitory area was ablaze with light.

Piercing alarms rang through the air, and lights created by magic or enchanted tools lit up half the sky like daylight.

Terrifying explosions echoed alongside the cries of underclassmen, sounding off now and then.

Many muscle men were rampaging, causing destruction.

The scene beneath the dorms was utter chaos. The younger students had never seen anything like this, and most were fleeing in terror.

But amidst the chaos, Muen could faintly spot some familiar figures pushing against the tide and joining the fray, battling the muscle men.

In the distance, support from upperclassmen was also swiftly approaching.

Aside from the cowards who fled and the strange absence of teachers, almost the entire academy was converging on the dormitory.

It was bustling and wild.

And at that moment—

As Muen stood there with dead-fish eyes—

The High Priest stepped up beside him, and slowly raised in his hand...

A mag!ic! loud!speak!er!

“Muen Campbell—!!”

A booming voice echoed through the air.

In an instant, the noisy chaos below fell silent.

“Look who I have here—this must be someone important to you, right?

If you want to save her, stop hiding like a coward! Be a man and come out—I’m waiting right here!”

Everyone—whether locked in battle, fleeing in fear, or closing in from afar—was drawn by the voice and looked up.

And what they saw was a massive muscle-bound man, and beside him, a golden-haired beauty in strange clothing who grabbed everyone’s attention.

Wow, what a stunning blonde beauty.

In that instant when all eyes turned his way, despite standing on a freezing rooftop in absurdly thin clothing, shivering like a dog—

Muen’s face burned hotter than it ever had in his life.

Yamete.

Please.

Don’t look.

Stop looking at me.

I’m begging you all—don’t look at me!!

......

......

“I knew it—Muen Campbell again. What kind of nonsense is he up to this time?”

Ariel was swinging a sword larger than her own body. After smacking away a charging muscle man, she looked up at the source of the voice.

Her face, which had twitched in annoyance at the mention of Muen’s name, instantly turned serious.

“I have to go save that beauty,” Ariel declared.

“Ehh—?!”

Liya, who had been beside her supporting Ariel with bursts of holy light, yelped in surprise.

“But there are so many enemies up there! Wait, don’t tell me that beauty is someone you know?!”

“No, I don’t know her. In fact, I felt kind of annoyed because she seems to be involved with that Muen Campbell.”

“But—”

Ariel cupped her smooth chin seriously.

“That girl kinda hits my XP preferences. I can’t just leave her.”

“I’m your childhood friend standing right here, and yet you’re into other women? Ariel, you’re the worst!!”

“I’m just going to ask for her transmission stone frequency, that’s all!”

But Ariel was already dashing off. Liya, though exasperated, had no choice but to follow.

......

......

In the shadows untouched by the lights, a seductive figure weaved through the forest like a snake.

Suddenly, the figure stopped, perched atop a tree branch, gazing at the stunning blonde figure atop the dormitory.

“Junior...?”

A beam of light from afar illuminated a delicate, enchanting face.

“So that potion’s effect turned out like this?”

Understanding flashed in Anna’s eyes. Then that understanding melted into a breathtaking smile.

“As expected of Junior Muen.”

The corners of Anna’s lips curled, her beautiful eyes narrowing, making the teardrop mole at the corner all the more seductive.

“You really never let anyone get bored.”

With that, she melted back into the shadows and flew swiftly toward the dormitory building.

......

......

“They’re even taking students hostage now?”

In the student council room, Celicia gazed out at the dormitory engulfed in light, her expression dark as water.

She hadn’t expected the academy, protected by three layers of Grand Seals, to be infiltrated by outsiders.

“No... with the third Grand Seal in place, this kind of trash that only bullies students shouldn’t be able to get in. So that must mean...”

The third Grand Seal was disabled?

But why?

Could it be a result of the changes brought by that pink bear?

Or was it something deeper—something he wouldn’t say, or couldn’t say, bound by an Oath of Silence?

Celesia’s eyes flickered.

But regardless, as student council president, she couldn’t sit by and do nothing.

Though she didn’t know why the teachers and professors had gone silent after the initial explosion, that wasn’t her concern for now.

First, take out those disgusting worms.

Celicia stood up, preparing to head for the dorms.

But after only a few steps, she suddenly stopped, sensing something.

Her expression darkened.

“Veil.”

“H-here!”

Veil’s voice came from outside the door.

“Take the student council elites and go purge those worms in the dormitory district. Make the safety of the hostage your top priority.”

“Yes!”

Veil answered firmly, but then asked with a trace of confusion:

“Then what about you, President?”

“You go on ahead. I have something else to take care of.”

“Understood.”

Trusting Celicia, Veil didn’t question further and left quickly.

After Veil departed, the room fell silent.

Utterly silent.

It was as if all background noise had been stripped away, and Celicia could hear nothing but the quickened rhythm of her own breathing.

She lowered her head, gazing at the floor beneath her.

From the corner of the room, shadows cast by the moonlight crept forward in twisted shapes.

But just twenty centimeters away from her feet, they stopped— blocked by a thin layer of frost.

The shadows circled the frost barrier, like wolves stalking prey.

Hoo—

After the stifling silence, a second person’s breathing filled the room.

A gaunt figure cloaked in black held a dim lantern and looked at her, his tone laced with sincere admiration:

“I didn’t expect to be discovered so early by Her Highness the Princess. What a shame—what a true shame. If I’d had just a little more time, the Empire’s proud Third Princess would have perished here.”

“I didn’t expect it either...”

Celicia raised her eyes, her pale blue irises like ancient glacial ice.

“That at the same time, two followers of Evil Gods would descend upon my St. Maria Academy.”

Outside the window, from Celesia’s view, the once-bright full moon had turned into a cold blue glow.

Under that deathly blue moonlight, all the world’s shadows seemed to transform into ghastly apparitions.

An Evil God.

The Silent Moon.