The Forsaken Hero

My hand recoiled from the shard, and I backed away from Luke, holding it behind my back. My heart raced.

”L-Luke?” I took a deep breath. ”You startled me.”

He folded his arms, gazing at the runes as they dissipated into rainbow light. ”You’re supposed to be enjoying the banquet.”

”I...didn’t want to be there.”

”Did someone hurt you?” he asked.

I shook my head. ”No, it’s just...”

”Too many people, huh?”

”Something like that.”

The silence drew out, neither of us making eye contact. I fidgeted with my skirt, adjusting it over and over.

”Um, Luke...?”

My voice was soft and tentative, but he flinched as if I shouted.

”Yes?” he finally asked.

”I...no, it’s nothing. I’m just...glad you’re okay. I was so worried when you didn’t come back.”

A shudder ran down his tail. ”Xiviyah, there’s something I have to tell you.”

Something in his voice caused me to look up. There was a shadow across his face and something in his eyes that chilled my blood. My tail started to twitch.

He swallowed hard. ”I...don’t think I can do this anymore. You’re too...innocent. Too sweet, and forgiving. You have too much light for the darkness of the path I must tread.”

My heart froze over. ”Luke...is this about the dragons? I’m sorry I–”

”I’ve known for a long time,” he said softly, touching his heart. ”I just couldn’t admit it. I didn’t leave the empire to the dragons. I left you. Even though I knew you were in danger, and it would hurt you. What I said before was true. We may be on the same path, but we’re on opposite sides, and my side leads deeper into the darkness.”

”No, it doesn’t have to–” I protested.

He held up a hand. ”Xiviyah, don’t lie to yourself. If that city was a stronghold of the Divine, and I knew of the dragons sealed beneath it, I would have unleashed them myself. I would have burned every man, woman, and child myself if it meant spitting in the eye of the gods.”

”But I...” I trailed off, tears gathering in my eyes. There was nothing I could say to that. He had done things like that before, and from what I knew of his soul when we entangled, was willing to do exactly as he threatened.

”Whatever attraction you feel to me, whatever we felt watching the sunrise, was an illusion. I can’t pretend anymore, nor can I, in good conscience, keep you near me. No child is allowed near the flames, and I’m a very, very hot fire.”

I stared at the ground. The air felt stifling and heavy, even more so than the atmosphere of the banquet. For some reason, my heart ached fiercely, like it had when Korra turned her back on me in the Divine Throne, or when Soltair first recoiled from my touch. Like it had when Aurle lay dead in my arms.

”What are you saying?”

My voice sounded hollow, even to my own ears. A tear trickled down my cheek. Luke flinched, eyes filled with turmoil.

”It was a fantasy, nothing more, and nothing could ever come of it.”

Luke strode up to the shard, laying his hand on its crystalline surface. I waited for the mana to spiral toward him and form words, but it didn’t. Instead, it rioted, swirling within the shard like a hurricane. A discordant note rang out, setting my teeth on edge and disturbing my soul. I winced and stumbled back, summoning my staff as a wave of nausea swept over me. It was like the shard was screaming, begging for help.

There was another crack, and a thin line broke across the shard’s surface. Mana seeped from the fissure, polluting the air like the chaotic ebbs of a Dispel Magic. The nausea grew worse, my vision swimming with black dots.

Suddenly, Luke’s soul lit up, and the escaping mana surged toward him. He absorbed more and more, his soul bloating beneath the strain. Something happened deep within, and the mana began to twist, inverting in on itself. A foul filth filled the air, and I tasted bile. The old, faded scars of my soul started to hurt, bathed in the taint of infernal mana. Excess mana, lost in the inefficiency of the conversion process, washed out in waves, gradually dissipating into the world.

After almost a minute, the shard was dull and lifeless. The last rainbow sparkles winked out, plunging the room into dim twilight. The sun outside had begun to set, casting a malevolent red light over the drained husk of crystal.

Luke lowered his hand, panting heavily. His soul shuddered, unstable with the tremendous amount of mana he’d absorbed. Already, it was breaking it down and assimilating the power. It would take a few days, but with this power alone, Luke had stepped into the middle stages of the eighth level.

”Do you see, now?” he asked softly, turning to face me. His violet eyes no longer seemed kind and caring. They flashed with power, dark and sinister. ”I will consume everything around me until there is nothing left. And then, I will ascend to the divine realms and join the demon lords and emperors in their war against the gods. The gods will never truly feel the deaths of the priests and paladins I slay here. But the war above, the war that you ignited, offers me a chance for vengeance. They took everything from me, and I will not rest until I have taken everything from them.”

Something else flashed through his eyes, and for a second, he seemed...guilty. Sad, even. His hand dropped from the shard.

”I’ve already taken so much from you,” he whispered. ”So much light and kindness. Perhaps that’s why we’re attracted to each other. You to the darkness you left behind, me to the light I can never have. If things keep up this way, one of us will get hurt. And I know it’s not going to be me. That’s why, even if you hate me for it, it’s time we walk our separate paths.”

”You don’t mean this, Luke,” I cried, tail lashing. ”Please, don’t say that.”

He turned his back on me, striding back the way he came. As he neared the entrance, he paused, giving me a long look over his shoulder.

”That’s what I mean, Xiviyah. You’re too soft and forgiving. Too accepting when I or others hurt you. I respect your desire to destroy the church, and I will permit you and your forces to fight at my side, but that is as far as we go.”

My heart dropped as the door echoed loudly behind him. I stared after him, tears trickling freely down my cheeks. Fable brushed against me, licking my hand, but I hardly noticed.

”What just happened?”

I collapsed to the ground, back against the shard, and hugged my knees to my chest. Fable whined and sat beside me. He nuzzled my head, but I pushed him away, staring at the ground. The evening sun was fading, plunging the room into darkness. The last vestiges of residual mana faded away. Tears seeped down my cheeks.

”What did I do wrong?” I whispered.

I squeezed my eyes shut, tail curling around my legs. I wanted to sob, but after the first few tears, no more came. I looked at Fable but had trouble actually seeing him. It was so cold and dark.

”What was it all for? Why did I try so hard? I thought if I trusted him, he would...would...”

What? Not abandon me? How bitter that tasted now. The promises of Fate, my friends’ reassurances, and all those times I wanted to give up... they were all for nothing. To think I arrived at the same place anyway.

The satisfaction of defeating the dragons slipped away, replaced by helplessness. What did it matter how much my soul hurt, or how hard it was to endure the endless visions of fate? What was it all for, in the end. Aurle, Elise, myself? I didn’t want anyone else to suffer, but none of that felt important anymore.

Remembering Luke’s words, I wondered if he was right. Were the kindness, light, and warmth that I had found all lies? They had been my only motivation, but if they weren’t real, what was left to strive for? Were my relationships with R’lissea, Elise, and Korra the same? It was all too easy to imagine having that same conversation. Maybe, one day, I’d wake up, and they’d be gone, just like I’d always feared. Or, even worse, they’d be there, but tell me the same things as Luke, that everything I cherished was just an illusion.

Fable gently gripped my sleeve in his jaws, pulling my arm out. He squirmed under it and nuzzled my cheek, drying the tears with his fur.

”You won’t leave me, too, will you?” I asked, burying my face in his fur.

Calm assurance washed through the bond, but it was a spark in an ocean of darkness. Was this the price Fate had warned me about, the cost of trusting someone else? It was so much darker here than the shadows I lived in before I met Luke. I didn’t want any part of it. Never again.