I Was Mistaken for a Saint in a Dark Fantasy

Is there any saying as empty as the words that all human life is equal?

Between noble heroes like a Firefighter who can sacrifice their life like a candle in the wind to save people right now,

and humans like Nazis who scatter nothing but shit and carbon dioxide into the world, if you said their lives were the same, who would agree with that?

No matter how much the concept of Natural Rights had developed in the modern society of the 21st Century, it was not an easily accepted concept.

I am not much different.

If Hitler and Gandhi were to arrive in my emergency room at the exact same time, the compass in my heart would immediately point to saving Gandhi.

It seemed I wasn’t the only one who thought this way.

”Um...... Teacher.”

As I was preparing for the Black Sorcerer’s Surgery, Ayla approached cautiously and spoke.”I...... hate Black magic. And I hate the people who Misuse it to torment others even more.”

”......”

”Honestly, I don’t really know why you are trying to save these kinds of people either, Teacher......”

I flinched for a moment.

Because beneath the Crow Mask was a professor who made a living off Black magic.

Of course, I know Ayla didn’t say it with that intention.

Even so, it couldn’t be helped that I felt a prick of guilt.

”Student Ayla.”

”I’m sorry for saying these words right before the surgery......”

”Do you not want to come into the surgery?”

”......Honestly speaking, yes.”

I understand.

Of course I understand.

Since I didn’t want to do the surgery right now either.

Starting with that Chimera Sorcerer bastard who got shot, I don’t like him.

I wonder how much damage he caused to so many people until he gained that ability.

As someone who knows what conditions Chimera lineage magic demands to reach accomplishment, I couldn’t help but be even more reluctant.

But what can be done about it.

A doctor from the 21st Century, especially a trauma surgeon, had been trained to be unable to do so.

”I feel the same way, Ayla. Student Jenny probably feels the same.”

”Then why......”

”Because there is a Patient right there.”

Once a Patient comes in, a doctor must suspend value judgments.

Whether that guy is Hitler, the Fat Duke of the North, or even someone trying to do a Cthulhu Summoning.

If there is a Patient, you have to treat them first.

There was a situation like this in my Previous life too.

— ”It’s a Patient from the prison. They said he got beaten to this state by his fellow inmates.”

When you’re at a University Hospital, people come in as patients who make you wonder if you really have to save this kind of human being.

Among them, there’s even trash that you might have seen on the news mixed in.

Honestly speaking, I often felt skeptical about whether I had to treat these humans while even spending tax money on them.

Every time I felt that way, my teacher taught me like this.

— ”I agree it’s annoying, but we still have to save them for now. You must have made the Declaration of Geneva when you graduated.”

— ”I purposely didn’t make the declaration back then, though.”

— ”You automatically declare it the moment your license is issued.”

— ”Tsk.”

As a joke, once they come in as a Patient, whether it’s the Fat Duke of the North or Hitler, a doctor is someone who has to save them.

It was something my teacher often said.

And from some point on, I too became brainwashed by that conviction, and saved any human who came up on the operating table first.

Whether it was trash who committed domestic violence, a guy brought in with a Stab Wound while doing Voice Phishing, or a damned bastard who sold Drugs to a kid.

I saved them first without evaluating them.

From my Previous life, through the Limbus Pit, and until now.

There was one reason.

”Student Ayla. What do you think would happen if Healers had the authority to select who would survive by receiving their treatment?”

”That’s nonsense! Only the Main Gods can decide something like that!”

”That is correct. That is why I do not judge Good and Evil.”

”Ah......”

The moment a doctor judges a patient’s Good and Evil, medical care deteriorates into a tool for trial and punishment.

Of course, someone might say that.

Couldn’t you just not treat the irredeemable trash?

But compromise is like inertia.

Once you start compromising, from then on you continue to compromise on things one by one.

At first, let’s not treat murderers.

Next, let’s not treat criminals.

Next, let’s not treat ex-convicts.

Someday, you might end up not treating someone just because you don’t like them or they went against those in power.

So, to prevent such a thing from happening, I do not judge.

Because it could become an irreversible arrogance.

— ”That is very irrational.”

— ”Right. What can you do when this irrational Philanthropy is the foundation of the 21st Century Medicine you are training in.”

If you’re going to pursue a conviction, do not make any exceptions to the point that it looks somewhat extreme.

To the point where it looks stupid, foolish, irrational, and contradictory to others.

Even so, if it’s really hard to accept......

— ”Then let’s change our logic. We are saving these people because we hate them. So that these humans cannot cowardly escape into death, we save them to make them pay the price for their sins alive.”

— ”Do you think that makes sense?”

— ”Then do you have a better logic?”

—- ”......I do not.”

I should think of it as taking the trouble to treat them so that they can be punished according to procedure.

”Let’s think about what to do with this Black Sorcerer after that.”

Whether they torture this guy, or execute the death penalty.

That was a matter to be left to the Security Bureau after saving him.

I know it’s very contradictory, but this is a conviction held by a doctor, so it couldn’t be helped.

”Student Jenny, you thought so too, didn’t you?”

I stood blankly at the entrance of the operating room and spoke while looking at Jenny, who was restless.

She looked like she was still unsure if her choice was right.

I spoke toward such a Jenny.

”Student Jenny. Your choice was right.”

”......Lord Saint, are you not going to laugh at me?”

”Not at all.”

”But......”

”Student Jenny. I’m sorry to cut you off. It seems the anesthesia has taken effect now.”

While we were making small talk, the preparations for surgery were finished.

Jenny seemed to want to say something more, but I pushed that aside for later.

I gestured with my head to Jenny and Ayla and said,

”If you don’t want to come in, you don’t have to.”

If an official Healer had done that, I would have set a date and had a meeting with them, but,

Jenny and Ayla aren’t Healers, they are students of the Department of Healing Arts.

Strictly speaking, it meant they were in an invincible state where they had no duty to participate in the surgery, only the right to observe.

I wasn’t such a rigid person to force them to come into the surgery.

”The choice is up to you students.”

”I......”

”I will go in.”

Instead of the hesitating Ayla, Jenny spoke first.

”I want to go in.”

”Good, come in.”

”M-Me too!”

Ayla raised her hand belatedly.

Like that, I took the two students and started the surgery.

***

”Time Out......”

”We don’t have time, so I will skip the Time Out.”

Procedures that have little direct relevance to maintaining life are drastically skipped.

”Are you not going to do a Clairvoyance exam?”

”It’s a gunshot wound Patient in the Right Upper Quadrant. Let’s skip all examination procedures and start the Open Surgery (Laparotomy). Anesthesiologist, please initiate the Massive Transfusion Protocol.”

”Yes.”

Normally, evaluating the extent of damage through an Imaging Test is the standard procedure.

However, there is no time for this Patient.

Right Upper Quadrant.

Of all places, it was because he got hit in the area where the liver is, an area that is hard to stop bleeding from.

’To think he got shot here of all places.’

Not that there’s any non-fatal organ in the torso, but still.

The liver is an extremely important organ, no less than the heart.

Just as all blood gathers to the heart, most blood vessels are connected to the liver.

Because of this, once bleeding starts in the liver, even if they don’t die instantly like with the heart, they die rapidly.

There’s a reason why people who make a living through swordsmanship stab upwards from the right side of the belly when killing someone.

Inside the cleanly maintained operating room.

I said to the Assistant Healer.

”Would it be possible to recover it with Heal?”

”Lord Saint. Do we have to use Divine Power on someone like this?”

”......Do you not want to do it?”

”I apologize.”

The Healer bowed their head deeply.

”I want to do it, but...... I don’t think I can. No, to be exact, it might be that I don’t want to do it.”

”......”

I felt like I knew what that meant.

One of the most important elements in Healing Magic is the caster’s emotions.

Just as magic requires harboring killing intent along with a burning image to set an opponent on fire,

To treat someone with Divine Magic, you must sincerely wish for that person’s recovery.

That is why the Assistant Healer was saying this.

— ”I cannot sincerely wish for this Black Sorcerer’s recovery.”

”I am sorry, Lord Saint. It seems I still have many shortcomings.”

”No.”

Every single High-rank Healer here who could immediately recover a liver returned an answer like this.

They could not harbor mercy for a Black Sorcerer.

”It is because our devotion is lacking. I apologize.”

Because their devotion is lacking?

No.

It is because they are devoted that they detest them even more.

That is why they cannot use Regeneration for them.

But I couldn’t bear to criticize those Healers.

Because I was also acting out of my conviction, not because I was sincerely worried for the Black Sorcerer.

To criticize them, I wasn’t a clean person either.

It was then.

”I...... I think I can do it.”

Ayla, cautiously raising her hand.

”If it’s just a Minor Heal...... I think I can do it.”

”Student Ayla. Will it really be possible? You aren’t pushing yourself?”

”After hearing Teacher’s words, I came to think that I sincerely want that person to recover. I think I can do it.”

Ayla looked at me with trembling eyes.

As expected.

Unlike me who was mistaken for a Saint, it seemed a genuine Saintess could harbor compassion even for a bastard like this.

I harbored a small feeling of respect for Ayla in my heart and immediately prepared for the surgery.

”Having only Student Ayla is reassuring enough.”

During The Spring of Those Who Could Not Return Incident.

I had managed to save patients in even worse conditions with just Minor Heal.

Greater Heal?

It’s a shame, but it can’t be helped.

As soon as the Assistant Healer to cast Heal was decided like that, I immediately prepared for the surgery.

”No. 10 Blade.”

The Scalpel placed in my hand.

Right before opening the flesh with that Scalpel, I took a moment to catch my breath.

”Huu......”

What is important in a liver gunshot wound is not to dilly-dally.

If you’re going to open it, you have to open it quickly.

However, opening it without preparation leads to a worse result than opening it late.

’Once the belly is opened, the inside will be flooded with blood, so I need to draw the blood vessel structure in my head beforehand and find it quickly.’

Right before the belly is opened, the blood pooled in the abdomen acts as compression, pressing down on the wound itself.

In such a situation, what would happen if the belly starts to open?

The clock that was ticking slowly immediately starts to tick faster.

The compressed wound opens, blood spouts like a fountain, and the Patient’s condition deteriorates rapidly.

Because of this, before cutting the belly open, you have to picture the blood vessels in your head in advance before going in.

Because finding them after opening is too late.

’The Technique is......’

Right. Let’s go with that.

Taking a short breath, as soon as I finished estimating the surgery, I brought the Scalpel to the Solar Plexus.

Even though the bleeding site is on the right side of the belly, I have to check the entire belly to secure the blood vessels anyway.

The Scalpel starting from the Solar Plexus glides down to the belly button.

At that moment,

Spurt!

Blood burst out from the belly like a fountain.

As the compression was released, the pooled blood burst out.

Even though it wasn’t her first trauma Patient, Ayla showed signs of panic.

”Uh? Uh??”

Because the surging blood was not ordinary.

Ayla looked at me with a gaze that seemed to ask if I could really save this.

I substituted my answer by immediately giving orders to the Assistant Healers.

”Starting Packing. Please perform Suction on the Hematoma.”

First, start a mindless 4-way Packing.

I stuff Gauze in 4 directions as if dividing north, south, east, and west.

In the meantime, the other Assistant Healer diligently scooped out the massive puddle of blood pooled in the belly.

In between, a Large Bowl even made an appearance.

Because pumping out blood with an elegant and cute device like a Suction (*a device used to suck up liquids) would take ages.

At times like this, I had to scoop out all the blood first, even if it meant using a Large Bowl, Ladle, or Bucket.

”......I can see a little bit now.”

Only after scooping out a certain amount of blood did the shape of the liver start to become visible through the Lenses of the Crow Mask.

”Bookwalter Retractor, please.”

Following the instruction, a massive and thick Metal pillar was erected next to the operating table.

An oval ring was hung on the long Metal arm extending from that pillar over the Patient.

Hooks were attached to each of the 4 directions of the ring.

When I hooked those Hooks onto the belly, the belly opened widely without the need for anyone to hold it.

I gently touched the blood-soaked liver surface with my fingers and said,

”Record this.”

As the Aspirator sucked up the blood, the path torn by the passing Bullet was briefly revealed.

I followed that direction with the tips of my fingers and explained the liver’s condition.

”Trajectory starts at Segment 5, passes through the deep part of Segment 8, and proceeds posterosuperiorly. For Segment 7...... suspect damage up to the boundary. Segment 6 is visually preserved. No findings of Left Lobe damage.”

Dividing the liver into 8 segments for the first time in a while, I pictured the path the Bullet passed through in my head.

Penetrating from bottom to top, from the center to the right lateral side.

Then the damaged blood vessels would be......

”On the surface side, it looks like Liver Parenchyma bleeding and damaged Hepatic Inflow...... on the deep side, it looks like Venous Bleeding...... Mmm......”

I need to determine which blood vessel is bleeding, but I’m not certain.

The main blood vessels of the liver can roughly be divided into three types.

Hepatic Artery, Hepatic Vein, Portal Vein.

Which of these blood vessels had burst was the key to the surgery.

”Let’s perform a Hepatic Sandwich to evaluate the blood vessels.”

”A sandwich......?”

Ah, right.

I remembered that the surgical Team was not yet accustomed to liver trauma surgery and corrected my expression.

”Place pads above and below the liver as if wrapping it, then press from both sides.”

Standard Hemostasis is done by stuffing Gauze into the wound site to stop the bleeding.

However, the liver is compressed from above and below to achieve Hemostasis.

Because the liver itself is such a soft and pliable tissue, stuffing Gauze into it will only widen the wound further.

It’s a similar logic to being careful when Cooking liver.

Of course, I have never tried Cooking with human liver before.

Pressing the torn liver with appropriate force as instructed for a few seconds.

When we removed the Gauze, blood started spouting from the torn liver again.

Primary Hemostasis failed.

If it comes to this, a somewhat extreme Technique is needed.

”Pringle Maneuver...... never mind.”

I was about to instruct the Pringle Maneuver but closed my mouth.

Because I remembered the fact that I hadn’t taught it yet.

”Clamp.”

Thinking that I should provide Education about this sometime, I grabbed the Clamp in my hand.

Below the liver, I found the blood-soaked reddish ligament connected toward the Stomach.

I pinched the blood vessels gathered beneath that ligament with forceps.

It was to figure out which blood vessel had torn.

To explain in detail, it’s a method of pinching the place where the lower blood vessels of the liver gather with forceps to figure out whether the upper or lower blood vessels are torn.

If pinching the bottom stops the bleeding, it means the lower blood vessels are damaged,

and if it plays innocent and blood continues to flow, it means the upper blood vessels are damaged.

Originally, the Assistant Doctor is supposed to evaluate all of this so the Surgeon Leading Surgery can piece together the next Technique in their head.

My Assistant Doctor wasn’t fully matured yet, so I had to do it all by myself.

”......The amount of Bleeding has decreased. It’s a Mixed Injury with Hepatic Inflow damage.”

Ta-da.

The Correct Answer was that it was torn both top and bottom.

Damn it.

I give up on a Right Lobe Resection.

It wasn’t a Bleeding that could be controlled just by cutting out the right lobe.

I grumbled internally and performed the Treatment I could do right away.

I clamped and tied the small arterial bleeding on the surface using a Kelly Clamp (*forceps).

I pressed and tied the shallow Liver Parenchyma using thick Silk Threads.

Small Micro-bleeding was handled with Refresh.

I performed Minor Heal specifically on the areas where blood was thinly spreading.

Even though I did this, the Bleeding from deep inside wasn’t something that could be managed in this situation.

But it didn’t matter.

”Student Ayla. Recovering internal organs is difficult with a Minor Heal, right?”

”Yes, probably......”

”Then please recover only the blood vessels.”

Originally, according to the Common sense of the past, a Greater Heal is necessary for blood vessel Regeneration.

However, since the concept of Surgery was established, it was revealed that if you achieve proper Hemostasis on the blood vessel and connect it well with thread, you can also achieve Hemostasis with a Minor Heal.

Having achieved Hemostasis to this extent, shouldn’t it be enough?

And my Prediction was spot on.

”Uh? Uh? The b-blood...... the bleeding stopped!”

As expected.

After tying up the large blood vessels to achieve Hemostasis, the Bleeding from the smaller blood vessels could be controlled with Minor Heal as well.

Of course, the torn liver did not return.

And the torn liver was a risk factor in its own right.

”I will perform a Surgical Irrigation once and check the Bile Duct.”

It’s easy to forget, but the liver is an organ that produces Bile, a Digestive Fluid.

In other words, if the Liver Parenchyma and Bile Duct are left torn, it means Bile could leak into the Abdominal cavity.

What happens if such a liver is left in a torn state?

The Digestive Fluid will immediately melt the inside of the belly.

It’s not as strong as Stomach Acid, but the liver’s Digestive Fluid is quite toxic in its own right, so if left alone, the inside of the belly will be a mess.

Checking the Bile Duct is to prevent such a thing from happening.

”Gallbladder Rupture confirmed. I will perform an Excision on the Gallbladder. The Common Bile Duct and Main Hepatic Duct are...... fortunately preserved.”

Should I call it heavenly luck.

Thanks to the Bullet cleanly penetrating through, the damage to the Biliary System didn’t look severe.

Like that, after finally inserting a Drainage Tube into the belly,

”I will now close the belly.”

By closing the belly, the Chimera Sorcerer’s Surgery was completed.

*

After completing the Surgery.

Around the time the other Healers, including Ayla, collapsed exhausted in the Operating Room.

I headed to the Recovery Room to check on the Patient’s condition.

Upon arriving at the Recovery Room, I saw an Earlier Guest who had visited the Black Sorcerer before me.

It was none other than Jenny.

”Student Jenny.”

”Lord Saint. Are you not tired?”

”There were few surgeries today, so I’m not tired.”

”......Just how many surgeries do you normally do.”

Well.

On average, 4 times?

I’ve also done consecutive surgeries for 36 hours.

Compared to that, one Surgery wasn’t that exhausting.

Rather, I was worried about the stamina of the other Healers who had done nothing but Assistance in the Operating Room and were drained.

’Should I make them do Morning gymnastics at least.’

Thinking like that, I said to Jenny.

”Before we went into Surgery, what were you trying to say?”

”Well, the thing is......”

Jenny looked at the Chimera Sorcerer, who had yet to wake up, and spoke.

”Until now, I hadn’t had any thoughts about Black Sorcerers dying. Even when I went to subdue the Black Sorcerers, I didn’t think much of it. But......”

Jenny let out a deep Sigh.

”But, right after my junior subdued this Black Sorcerer, I heard him mutter something.”

— ”I don’t...... want to...... die.”

”Honestly, my heart was cold. But then, the Old Testament Style Doctrine came to mind......”

”So is that why you asked Erika to let him live?”

”......Yes. It was closer to a Sense of Duty rather than compassion, though.”

Jenny wore a self-deprecating smile on her face.

”It was because of the Conviction that made me a Healer.”

She took a Dice out of her pocket.

That Dice I had given her as Yulian.

”I have an Older Brother. Someone who, at one time, couldn’t uphold the world’s standards. When that Older Brother locked himself in his room, I was subjected to Pointing fingers for the reason that I didn’t shed tears for him.”

She rolled the Dice in her palm.

”So I decided that I would not evaluate someone I do not completely know. This is also why I liked Dice. Because it’s not me judging, but luck deciding.”

Clack, roll......

The Dice rolling at the Patient’s Bedside.

”Saying that I want to save this person too......”

”Jenny, are you saying it’s because of the Rule you set?”

”Yes. Because separate from my emotions, I have a duty as a Healer.”

But Jenny didn’t seem to like that choice of hers.

”Doesn’t it look contradictory from your perspective, Lord Saint? The fact that I contributed to this situation and yet am trying to save him?”

”Not at all.”

Don’t the American Police do that when arresting criminals too?

They shoot like hell first, and if the guy survives, they send him to the hospital first, don’t they?

At first glance, it’s a Contradiction in itself.

Trying to kill someone just a moment prior, and then trying to save them when the opponent is incapacitated and lying in a pitiful state.

Furthermore, this is a Dark Fantasy.

A half-baked Previous life mindset is unlikely to earn you any praise.

But I liked such a conviction full of contradictions.

To begin with, where among people’s convictions is there one that operates smoothly without contradiction?

If there was such a conviction, things would have been unified as one without ideological or Religious conflicts.

That is why, I liked Jenny’s contradictory conviction.

Because,

”I have done that as well.”

”Yes? You too, Lord Saint?”

”I have also treated someone who tried to harm me.”

Since I am living like that right now.

In the past, when I was at the Clinic with Erika.

In the winter, there was a Clown bastard from H-Sector who came to harm me.

When that guy was incapacitated by Erika, I performed the best Treatment I could.

It wasn’t because I pitied him, or because I was a Virtuous Sage who loved even my enemies.

It was just the conviction ingrained in my body as a doctor that made me move.

Because of that, Jenny’s actions didn’t feel strange to me.

When I shared this with Jenny, she showed surprise while also revealing curiosity.

”Then what happened to that Clown......”

”Who knows?”

Right after, he was dragged away by Wangcho, and I don’t know what happened to that guy either.

Nor do I want to know.

Hearing this, Jenny looked at me in bewilderment.

”It’s a Patient that you saved, Lord Saint, but you just let him be dragged away?”

”I have fulfilled my Duty.”

There is a Misunderstanding, but a doctor’s duty is only up to doing their best effort for the Patient.

Whether that Patient made a Fault and goes to the Slammer or faces Punishment/execution, that wasn’t something for my Involvement.

Unless they abruptly execute a sentence inside the sacred Hospital, taking them away is none of my business.

”......That sounds like a very convenient conviction.”

”It’s a necessary conviction in a complex world.”

Jenny chewed on that sentence for a moment.

Soon after, she chuckled and said.

”Then may I also imitate that conviction a bit?”

”I would be glad.”

”Then......”

Jenny’s gaze turned toward the Exit of the Recovery Room.

Soldiers wearing Military uniforms were waiting at the Entrance, minding my reactions.

Jenny gave them A glance and said.

”There’s no need for me to go out of my way to stop those people from taking the Patient away, right?”

”I have no Intention of stopping them.”

Originally, people who came out of Prison for Surgery go right back to Prison once the Surgery is done and they recover.

In this world, human rights awareness is a bit lower, so it seems they are taking him away even before he recovers, though.

”Are you going to stop them, Student Jenny.”

At my Question, Jenny gently shook her head.

Soon, as if we had reached an agreement, the two of us spoke to the Soldiers standing at the Entrance.

”We apologize for making you wait.”