Louis Collins: A Post-American Odyssey

Louis wiped his mouth with a napkin and threw it on his plate. He looked at the others. They had finished too. Rachel had eaten most of her pancakes, and was now sipping her orange juice.

“Let’s go,” he said, standing up.

Mark rushed to their table. “Is everything to your satisfaction, sir?”

“Very, Mark,” Louis said. “Keep up the good work.”

“Thank you, sir,” Mark said, bowing. “It’s an honor to serve you.”

Louis nodded. “How do our customers like their free T-shirt?”

“They love them, sir,” Mark said, smiling. “We’re running out of them. I ordered more from Sacramento. They should be here by this afternoon.”

“Good,” Louis said. “Now, if you’ll excuse us, we have to leave.”

“Safe travels, Mr. Collins,” Mark said. “And good luck.”

“Thanks, Mark,” Louis said, leading the others out of the restaurant. He glanced at Angelique. “Should we let Rachel ride with us, or put her in a guard SUV?”

“I think she should be with us for now,” Angelique said. “We want to know more about her, and the Prophet King.”

“Alright,” Louis said. “Let’s go.”

They walked to the RV. Yamamoto and García were standing by the door, waiting for them.

“Sir,” Yamamoto said. “The convoy is ready.”

“Good,” Louis said. “Rachel is coming with us in the RV.”

Yamamoto looked at Rachel, then at Louis. “Understood, sir.”

Louis climbed into the RV, followed by Angelique and the others. Rachel hesitated for a moment, then climbed in too. Louis led them upstairs to the lounge.

“Have a seat,” Louis said, gesturing to the sofa. “Make yourself comfortable.”

Rachel sat on the sofa. “This is a very nice vehicle. I’ve never been in one like it before.”

“It’s our home,” Cherish said, sitting next to her. “We travel a lot.”

“You are lucky,” Rachel said. “To have a home and a family.”

“We are.” Cherish smiled.

The RV started moving as Willa turned on the autopilot. “Salt Lake City, here we come.”

“We’re on a road trip to hell,” Maeve said, sitting on a chair. “I hope they have good booze there.”

“They don’t,” Angelique said. “Mormons don’t drink alcohol.”

“What kind of life is that?” Maeve asked. “I’d rather die.”

“Then maybe you’ll get your wish in Utah.” Savannah rolled her eyes.

“Let’s not be morbid, Savvy,” Donya said. “We will be fine.”

Louis looked at Rachel. “Rachel. Tell me about the Prophet King. Have you met him?”

Rachel shook her head. “No. I only saw his portrait and heard his voice. Brother John said it was a test of my faith. That I must love him without seeing him.”

“Of course he did,” Willa said. “It’s easier to worship an image than a real man.”

“And the portrait?” Angelique asked. “What did he look like?”

“He looked like an angel,” Rachel said, her eyes bright. “He had a long brown beard and kind, blue eyes, and a crown of gold on his head. He was smiling at me. He looked like Jesus.”

“I bet,” Gladice said. “A lot of men try to look like Jesus. It’s a good way to get laid.”

Willa took out her laptop. “I have a few photos of him. Here.” She turned the screen toward Rachel. “Is this him?”

Rachel looked at the screen. “Yes. That’s him. That’s the Prophet King.”

Louis leaned over. The photo was of a man in his late forties, with a brown beard and blue eyes. He was wearing a pair of glasses and a simple suit. He looked more like a college professor than a king.

“Doesn’t look like an angel to me,” Maeve said. “Not even a king. We have a real king in Portland. King Philip Bourbon. He dresses like one.”

“Thank you, Mae-Mae,” Angelique said. “I appreciate your support for my father.”

“Just saying,” Maeve said. “A king should look like a king. Not like a dork.”

“He is not a dork,” Rachel said. “He is a humble servant of the Lord. He does not need earthly riches to prove his worth.”

“Yeah, right,” Gladice said. “I bet he has a lot of earthly riches with a lot of wives and kids.”

“He has six wives and twenty-three children.” Rachel said. “He loves them all.”

“And he’s about to add a seventh wife,” Maeve said.

“Are you a virgin, Rachel?” Willa asked.

Rachel’s cheeks turned pink. “I am.”

“I thought so,” Willa said. “He’s a pedophile.”

“He is not,” Rachel said. “He is a prophet. And I’m not a child. I’m nineteen.”

“We’re at the same age, Rachel! I’m nineteen too!” Cherish smiled. “Do you like chess?”

“Chess?” Rachel asked, confused. “I’m not allowed to play games. Brother John said they are a distraction from the Lord’s work.”

“That’s a shame.” Cherish shrugged. “It’s a good game.”

“What is the Lord’s work?” Donya asked. “Besides trafficking and selling girls?”

“Spreading the true gospel,” Rachel said. “Building a righteous kingdom on earth. A kingdom of peace and harmony, where the key of priesthood is passed through the bloodline of the prophet.”

“The key of priesthood?” Savannah asked, her eyebrow raised. “What the hell’s that?”

“It’s the power to bind and loose on earth and in heaven,” Rachel said, her voice filled with awe. “The Prophet King holds it. He will pass it to one of his sons. The one he chooses. The one who is worthy.”

“Is it an actual key? A golden one?” Gladice asked, leaning forward. “Can I see it?”

“It’s not a physical key, Glads,” Angelique said, sighing. “It’s a metaphorical one. A spiritual authority.”

“It sounds like a bunch of bullshit to me,” Maeve said. “A way to control people.”

“It is the truth,” Rachel said, looking at Maeve. “You are a sinner. You are blind. You cannot see the light.”

“I see the light just fine,” Maeve said. “I have good eyesight.” She looked outside the window. “And I can see the balls of that horse over there.”

Louis laughed. “Good one, Mae-Mae.”

Rachel gasped. “That is a vulgar word. You should not say such things.”

“I say whatever I want,” Maeve said, looking at her. “You can’t stop me.”

“Please, stop,” Donya said. “We’re not here to fight. We’re here to talk.”

“What’s there to talk about?” Maeve asked. “She’s a brainwashed fool. We’re wasting our time.”

“She is our guest, Maeve,” Louis said. “So we will treat her with respect.”

“I’m not your guest,” Rachel said. “I’m following my shepherd. I will do whatever he says.”

“Good,” Louis said. “Then I say we will have a peaceful and productive conversation.” He looked at Willa. “What else do we know about the Kingdom of Utah?”

Willa typed on her laptop. “According to our intel, it’s a theocratic monarchy. The Prophet King is both the spiritual and temporal leader. His army is known as the ‘Nauvoo Legion.’ They also have a small navy.”

Gladice laughed. “They have a navy in Utah? Are they going to fight the Great Salt Lake?”

“They have a base on the Great Salt Lake,” Willa said. “A few patrol boats. For security.”

“Still sounds ridiculous,” Gladice said.

“Let’s focus, Glads,” Angelique said. “Tell us about their secret police.”

“They call themselves the ‘Danites,’” Willa said. “They are the Prophet King’s eyes and ears. They are known for their brutality and their loyalty.”

“I wonder where Brother John is now,” Angelique said. “Maybe the Danites are watching him.”

“I’m more interested in the Prophet King’s six wives,” Gladice said. “Are they hot? Are they allowed to have sex with each other?”

“Probably not,” Willa said. “We don’t have any photos of them any way.”

“It’s against their doctrine to have sex with multiple partners. Even a man with multiple wives is only supposed to have sex with one at a time, and only for procreation,” Angelique said.

“That’s boring,” Gladice said.

“Very,” Willa said.

Louis leaned back on the sofa. “Do they have an air force or any anti-air defenses?”

“They have a few old fighter jets from the old US National Guard and some surface-to-air missile sites around Salt Lake City,” Willa said. “But I doubt they can stop the Rods of the Pacific if we ever have to use them.”

“What are the Rods of the Pacific?” Rachel asked, her eyes wide.

Louis cleared his throat. “They are rods to catch big fish in the Pacific.”

“Like a fishing rod?” Rachel asked.

“Exactly.”

Rachel looked confused. “But why would you need big fishing rods in Utah?”

Gladice laughed. “Because we are going to steal all of your fish in the Great Salt Lake.”

“There are no fish in the Great Salt Lake,” Willa said. “It’s too salty.”

“Because someone stole all of them,” Gladice said.

Rachel stared at her. “Who would do such a thing?”

“You’ll never know,” Gladice said, winking. “It’s a mystery.”

Donya sighed. “Can we please stop messing with her? She’s clearly not well.”

“Lighten up, Donya,” Maeve said. “She’s having fun.”

“I don’t think she is,” Donya said.

Rachel looked at Louis. “My shepherd, are you going to steal the fish in the Great Salt Lake?”

“No, Rachel,” Louis said, sighing. “I’m not going to steal the fish.”

Rachel looked relieved. “Good. I was worried.”

Gladice laughed again. “He’s going to steal the shrimp, Rachel. That’s the real prize.”

Rachel gasped. “No.”

“Yes,” Gladice said. “He is a shrimp thief.”

“I am not a shrimp thief,” Louis said, trying not to laugh.

Gladice kept going. “He sells them to the Dixie black market for a very high price. The black market is full of shrimps from the Great Salt Lake. That’s how he became so rich.”

Rachel’s face turned pale. She looked at Louis. “Is this true?”

“No, Rachel,” Louis said. “We are here to bring you to the Prophet King and to have a peaceful meeting. That is all.”

“Then why is she saying all these things?” Rachel asked, pointing a finger at Gladice.

“Because she’s bored,” Angelique said, giving Gladice a look.

“I am not bored,” Gladice said. “I’m having fun.”

“Let’s have fun in a more constructive way,” Angelique said. “Louis, what’s the plan for when we arrive?”

“First, we establish a base of operations. A secure place to stay,” Louis said. “Then we meet with the Prophet King on our terms.”

“Where?” Savannah asked. “In the Prophet King’s palace?”

“I hope not,” Maeve said. “That place is probably full of traps and guards.”

“I doubt they would let us bring our guards into the palace anyway,” Willa said. “We’ll have to leave them outside. And that makes us vulnerable.”

“They will come in with us,” Louis said. “All of them. Or there’s no meeting.”

“You think he will agree to that?” Donya asked.

“He will,” Louis said. “Because he wants Rachel back.”

“You’re very confident, Louis,” Willa said. “I hope your confidence is not misplaced.”

“It’s not misplaced, Willa,” Louis said. “It’s calculated.”

“Okay,” Angelique said. “Let’s assume he agrees. What’s the next step?”

“We talk,” Louis said. “We see if he’s willing to make a deal. If he is, we make it. If he’s not, we have other options.”

“Other options like the Rods of the Pacific?” Maeve asked.

“Yes,” Louis said. “But let’s not jump to that.”

Rachel gasped. “The rods to catch fish? Are you going to use them in the Prophet King’s palace?”

Gladice laughed. “Let’s hope your king doesn’t keep any fish or shrimp.”

Rachel stared at her. “You are a wicked woman.”

“I am,” Gladice said. “And I’m proud of it. And I’m going to stay that way.”

“You will be punished,” Rachel said. “The Lord will punish you. He will strike you down with lightning.”

“I’d like to see him try,” Gladice said. “I have a very good insurance policy.”

Rachel looked at Louis. “My shepherd, why are you traveling with such a sinful woman? She is a bad influence on you. She will corrupt your soul.”

“I can take care of my soul, Rachel,” Louis said. “Don’t worry about me.”

“But I do,” she said. “I worry about you. Because you are my shepherd. And I am your lamb.”

Louis sighed. He looked at Angelique. “I need a drink.”

“I’ll get you one,” Angelique said, standing up and walking to the bar. Donya and Cherish followed her. They came back with a bottle of sparkling wine and a tray of nine glasses. Angelique poured the wine into the glasses and handed one to each of them, including Rachel.

Rachel looked at the glass in her hand. “I’m not allowed to drink alcohol.”

Louis said. “You are allowed now.”

Rachel hesitated. She looked at Louis, then at the glass. She took a small sip.

“It’s good,” she said.

“Of course it is,” Gladice said, raising her glass. “It’s from the Dominion. We know how to have fun.”

“I can see that,” Rachel said, taking another sip. “It’s very bubbly.”

“That’s the point,” Gladice said.

Louis sipped his wine. He felt the bubbles tickle his tongue. He needed this.

Willa looked at Rachel. “Do you know about an auction in Salt Lake City last week?”

Rachel looked at her. “No. What auction?”

“An auction of women,” Willa said. “You were one of them. The Prophet King bought you for a million euros.”

Rachel stared at her. “That’s a lie. I was not sold. I was chosen for a holy union. Brother John told me the Prophet King had chosen me. He showed me the portrait. And he told me to prepare myself.”

“Prepare yourself for what?” Angelique asked.

“For my marriage,” Rachel said. “And for my wedding night.”

“Did he teach you what to do on your wedding night?” Gladice asked, her eyes gleaming.

Rachel blushed. “He did.”

“What did he teach you?” Gladice asked. “Show us.”

“Gladie, stop,” Louis said. “That’s enough.”

Gladice sighed. “Fine. I was just curious.”

“I’m sure you were,” Willa said, rolling her eyes. “Now, tell me, Rachel. Do you remember any of the elders who went with Brother John to Salt Lake City? Besides Brother John himself?”

Rachel thought for a moment. “There were Brother Matthew, Brother Micah, and Brother Nathan. They are the elders of the farm. They are the ones who help Brother John with his work.”

“Thank you, Rachel,” Willa said, typing on her laptop. “That’s very helpful.”

“Why are you asking?” Rachel asked. “Do you want to hurt them?”

“No, Rachel,” Louis said. “We just want to talk to them.”

“They are good men,” Rachel said. “They serve the Lord.” She looked at Louis. “Like you do, Brother Louis.”

Louis sighed. He finished his glass of wine. “Angi, can I get another one?”

Angelique took his glass and refilled it. “Of course.”

“Thanks,” he said, taking a sip. “I need it.”

Rachel looked at him. “You seem tense, Brother Louis. Is something bothering you?”

Louis looked at her. “Yes, Rachel. A few things.”

“Tell me,” she said. “Maybe I can help. I can pray for you. That will bring you peace.”

Cherish smiled. “I can pray with you, Rachel. I can pray for all of us.”

“That would be nice,” Rachel said, looking at Cherish. “I would like that.”

“Me too,” Cherish said. “I will lead the prayer. And we will hold hands.”

Cherish and Rachel held hands. The others watched, with a mix of curiosity and amusement.

“Dear Lord,” Cherish said, her eyes closed. “We thank you for this day. For your blessings. For your guidance. For your protection. We ask you to watch over us. Over Louis. Over our journey. Over our family. Amen.”

“Amen,” Rachel said, her eyes filled with tears. “Thank you, sister.”

“You’re welcome,” Cherish said, smiling. “I feel better now. Don’t you?”

“I do,” Rachel said. “I feel your faith. It strengthens mine.”

“I’m glad,” Cherish took her hand. “We are sisters in faith.”

Louis sipped his wine. He looked at them. He didn’t know what to think. He felt a headache coming on.

Cherish turned to him. “I can sing you a song, Louis. If you want.”

“I’d like that,” he said, looking at Maeve. “Maybe you can play the guitar for us.”

Maeve looked at him, then at the guitar at the corner. “I haven’t played in a while. But I can try.”

“I’d love to hear you play, Mae-Mae,” Donya said. “I’m sure you’re good.”

Maeve stood up and walked to the guitar. She picked it up and sat on the sofa. She strummed the strings. A soft melody filled the room.

Cherish cleared her throat and started singing. Her voice was sweet and clear.

Almost heaven, West Virginia

Blue Ridge Mountains, Shenandoah River

Maeve’s fingers moved on the frets, picking out the chords. Her expression was focused, her eyes distant. Louis watched her, feeling a knot in his stomach. He thought of her sister, Rebecca. He thought of all the people they had lost. He thought of all the people they had saved.

Life is old there, older than the trees,

Younger than the mountains, growing like a breeze

Rachel looked at Cherish, her face filled with wonder. She started humming along, her eyes closed.

Country roads, take me home

To the place I belong

Louis closed his eyes. He felt Angelique’s hand on his shoulder. He put his own hand on hers.

Country roads, take me home

To the place I belong

West Virginia, mountain mama

Take me home, country roads

Cherish’s voice trembled. A tear ran down her cheek. Rachel opened her eyes. She saw the tear. She reached out and wiped it away.

“Don’t cry, sister,” she said. “The Lord is with us.”

Cherish nodded, sniffing. “I know.” She kept singing.

All my memories

Gather ’round her

Miner’s lady

Stranger to blue water

Maeve’s playing grew firmer as the song continued. She leaned over the guitar, pressing the chords harder. Louis saw a tear run down her cheek too.

Dark and dusty

Painted on the sky

Misty taste of moonshine

Teardrop in my eye

Angelique squeezed Louis’s shoulder. He opened his eyes. He looked at Maeve. He saw the pain in her face.

I hear her voice

In the mornin’ hour she calls me

The radio reminds me of my home far away

And drivin’ down the road I get a feelin’

That I should have been home yesterday, yesterday

Cherish’s voice broke. She couldn’t sing anymore. She started to cry. Rachel put her arms around her. Maeve kept playing. For a few beats, only the guitar filled the room. Then she began to sing where Cherish had stopped. Her voice was rougher. Lower. And sadder.

Country roads, take me home

To the place I belong

West Virginia, mountain mama

Take me home, country roads

Maeve’s song ended. She put the guitar aside, her shoulders shaking. Savannah walked to her and put her arms around her. “It’s okay, Mae-Mae. We’re here.”

Maeve sobbed. “I miss her. I miss my sister.”

“I know,” Savannah said, stroking her hair. “I know.”

Louis stood up and walked to them. “Come here, Cherry, Mae-Mae.”

Cherish and Maeve came to him. He held them. He felt their tears on his shirt. He closed his eyes.

“It’s okay,” he said. “We’re okay.”

He held them for a long time. The others watched, silent.

“I’m sorry,” Cherish said, pulling away. “I didn’t mean to make everyone sad.”

“It’s okay, Cherry,” Louis said. “It’s a sad song.”

“I love that song,” Rachel said, her eyes wet. “It’s beautiful.”

“It is,” Cherish said, wiping her tears. “It’s about home.”

“Do you miss your home, Rachel?” Donya asked.

Rachel looked at her. “My home is with the Prophet King and the Lord.”

Yamamoto’s voice came through the comms. “Sir, we are approaching the border of the Kingdom. Two checkpoints are ahead. The Central Union Border Service is at the first one. The Nauvoo Legion is at the second one. They are both heavily armed.”

“Let them do their jobs,” Louis said. “And we will do ours.”