What Do You Mean I'm The Captain Of A Yandere Mercenary Company?

I looked pointedly at the dead guy that was now at the robot’s feet before looking back at the robot again.

I know that it was clearly a robot not because it had that barcode like that android on it but because it actually looked like a stereotypical robot.

I’m talking about a head that had two giant lenses that reminded me of old school cameras you might have found that still used films to keep a record of the pictures they take.

Aside from that, their body was just a robotic frame where all the parts, circuits and wiring was visible.

I looked back at the thug that was still lying dead at the robot’s feet before pointing at it, ”Are you going to do anything about that?”

The robot sat a little straighter, as though taking a moment to process my question before responding, ”Certainly, please hold on. Engaging cleaning more.”

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It then stood up, pointed its hand at the dead body of the thug, before letting loose a jet of fire that completely incinerated the corpse.

That was so unexpected that the three of us jumped back from it, both in surprise and also to avoid the flames that were firing out from its palm.

What the flying fuck?!

The fire it shot out quickly consumed the corpse and, as though it was something that happened often, a drone came flying down from the ceiling and dropped a pail of water on top of the burning corpse to put out the fire.

Then, even more drones came flying in to start sweeping up the ashes left behind by the incinerated corpse before they started cleaning up and sterilising the ground where the corpse had been.

In less than a minute, any traces of the corpse had been wiped clean like it had never existed in the first place.

Even the burn stains on the ground had been completely wiped away.

The robot then turned to address us, the camera lenses it had as eyes seemingly focusing on us.

”Now, what can I do for you, esteemed customers?”

Amber was the first to recover and dropped the Merc on the ground in front of it, ”I contacted this place earlier about having a patient that was exposed to the vacuum of space and needed medical treatment.”

The robot immediately stood up, ”Ah yes, I have your call logs here. Please stand back, I shall now proceed to begin medical treatment on the patient.”

Amber stepped back and let the robot approach the unconscious Merc on the ground.

A beam of light shot out from its eyes to scan the Merc from head to toe before it let out a beep, ”Scan complete. Diagnosis… Hypothermia… Internal bleeding… External laceration wounds… Fever… Recommended treatment… Termination.”

What the fuck?!

The robot lifted up its hand and closed it into a fist, seemingly getting ready to smash it down on the Merc’s head.

I reached out my hands towards it in a panic, ”No, no! Stop!!”

The robot paused, ”Yes? What might you require?”

”What are you doing?!”

”I am beginning my medical treatment on the patient.”

”No, you’re trying to kill him!”

”By my records, euthanasia is still an accepted form of treatment. I have deemed that the most efficient way of treating this patient is to be as such.”

Holy fuck.

I turned to Amber and gave her a questioning look.

She shrugged, ”I just searched for the doctor with the highest rates of success in their medical treatments. How was I supposed to know this was the reason why?”

Well… I don’t blame you for that, Amber… But holy shit… I guess I forgot what place we were in…

I turned back to the robot, ”Could you save his life instead?”

The robot seemed to take a moment, as if it was doing some calculations.

It then turned to me, ”That would be possible according to the resources I have on hand. The total cost of such a procedure would be thirty thousand Credits. Would you like to proceed? If you agree, please say ’yes’.”

”Err… Is that considered a reasonable price?” I asked my companions.

Amber nodded, ”Not only that, it’s dirt cheap actually. Why is it so cheap?”

A whirring sound came from the robot, ”Unexpected answer received. Please confirm if you would like to proceed on with the treatment.”

”Oh, yes, sure. We’ll cut it out from his tab later,” Amber decided,

Lea turned to her, ”And what happens if he can’t pay?”

”We’ll find other ways, don’t worry~”

I shuddered slightly from Amber’s words, wondering just what ’other ways’ she could be referring to.

The robot whirred again, ”Confirmation received. Please note that you will need to pay the agreed amount upon treatment completion. Failure to do so will result in immediate patient termination. Thank you.”

Oh what the fuck man? Who the fuck programmed this guy?!

A few drones then came out from the walls and picked the guy up to move him into another room to lay him on a surgeon’s table.

The robot then turned back to us, ”Would you like to watch the procedure? It is an additional ten thousand Credits if you would like to do that.”

I gave Amber a pointed look and she just shrugged at me.

I turned back to the robot and shook my head, ”It’s fine. We’ll wait outside. But could we know why it costs so little?”

”Query received. Response… This clinic was set up by my creator to allow even the poorer people to have access to healthcare by utilising robotic doctors like myself as part of a study. Thus, the treatment costs are heavily subsidised.”

”And what are the results?”

”It has been shown to be greatly successful since we have a higher treatment success rate than human doctors. This study proves that we would be able to eventually replace human medical professionals with a cheaper alternative which would benefit everyone throughout the galaxy.”

”Do the studies take into account that most of the success comes from the fact that you fucking kill your patients?”

”I apologise, my records show that no such thing happened.”

”How many percent of your patients were euthanized?”

”According to my records, ninety seven point eight eight percent.”

Holy mother of god… Lea was also making the same surprised face as I was while Amber didn’t exactly look that surprised.

”Are there any other questions?” The robot doctor asked.

”Err… The patient will live right? And he will recover back to perfect health?” I asked.

”The possibility of the patient recovering back to perfect health is eighty nine point seven percent…. Eighty nine point five percent… Eighty nine point three percent…”

”Holy shit, ok! Ok! Hurry up and go treat him!!”

”Request received, proceeding with treatment. Everyone that is unrelated to the operation, please remain outside. Any attempts to open the operation door will be met with use of deadly force.”

And as if that was a signal of some sort, two automated turrets popped out from the ceiling to guard the door to the operating room.

… I won’t even comment on that…

I turned towards Amber, ”What the heck was that?”

Amber made a face, ”Honestly… This isn’t even the worst thing I have seen around actually. Corporations like these do this all the time.”

”Like what?”

”Oh, I’ve seen some corporations who straight up kidnap people and do experiments on them. Not even something that’s kept hidden you know?”

”Wait, what? How are they even getting away with something like that?”

”Because they only take from the bottom rung of society so no one cares. Heck, if I had to guess, the people behind this operation aren’t even putting this doctor here out of the goodness of their hearts. Someone must know that the patients are being offed and they’re probably selling off their organs and marking them as ’treated’ in their records.”

Lea frowned at Amber, ”What is wrong with you humans?”

Amber waved her hand dismissively, ”Oh don’t act like no one else does this. This is pretty much how most corporations work. They only care about making money and if selling some humans would make some money, they would. Why else do you think you’re a slave?”

The Alv pursed her lips but said nothing more.

My blonde haired lover then continued, ”Besides, it’s not like we’re any better. We’re literally killing people and looting their bodies just to get money in the first place. Pretty sure we’re not in a position to think about who has the moral high ground. The corps just do it on a much larger scale and much more indiscriminately.”

Oof… I didn’t think we’ll be talking about that today but I suppose Amber does have a point.

After all, I had also very happily taken stuff off a dead body just to make some Cre--

Amber suddenly hugged me to her chest, ”The only person that I can say is pure and innocent is Tera of course! No one else can even come close to that! You’re so cute, Tera!”

Lea also nodded, ”On that, I am in agreement.”

… What the hell, girls?