Shadow Slave

Shadow remained motionless, studying the Demon of Desire with a sense of trepidation.

Most of his senses were useless, as if Hope wasn’t there at all. That was because she was suppressing her presence, sparing the world the unfathomable burden of her resplendent divinity — she was known to be a patron of humans, after all. If Hope did not hide her true splendor, merely being near her would have crushed mundane souls. So, Shadow could only see her.

Even then, her figure was nebulous. All he saw was an elegant white dress outlining the shape of a graceful figure, and yet somehow, it felt as if there was nothing beneath the soft fabric at all.

It felt as if the white fabric hid a cosmic infinity, a vast abyss woven out of purest darkness, purest light, and then shaped carelessly to resemble a human.

He shivered, overwhelmed by her breathtaking radiance.

He shuddered, overcome by an alien sense of revulsion.

He felt compelled to fall to his knees in blind worship. He felt his heart drowning in terror, barely suppressing an impulse to flee.

Every emotion, every desire, every passion he had known and tried to forget suddenly ignited with an insurmountable intensity, setting his lightless soul aflame.

Shadow gritted his teeth and suppressed these frenzied flames, pacifying his soul. Just as he did, a voice that sounded like the wind that blew between distant stars and the sound of myriad prayers resounded in the still darkness of the night.

That voice was the most radiant sound he had ever heard, but also the most harrowing.

”You shouldn’t exist.”

Shadow trembled.

Hope simply shared her thought, but even if she did not put any intent into her words, the world shifted slightly, reshaping itself to fit them. He felt his existence growing a little more vague than it had been before, and had to call upon his Will to solidify it. Only then did Shadow have a chance to consider Hope’s words.

‘I.. shouldn’t exist?’

It seemed he and the Demon of Desire shared the same thought. Shadow was tired of his endless existence, after all.

Still...

What exactly did she mean by that?

”Why should I not exist?”

Hope stood beneath the statue of War God. The statue was illuminated by starlight, while Hope’s silhouette was drowning in darkness.

Her nebulous voice resounded again, making the Shadow shiver.

“Because you are not allowed to exist.”

Taking a step forward, she seemed to study him for a moment.

Then, an ethereal chuckle echoed in the wind.

“And you do not wish to exist, either.”

Her words sounded certain, but carried a subtle hint of a question.

Shadow frowned, feeling lost. When he sensed the ethereal but irresistible call, he knew that the Demon of Desire had summoned him. But now that he faced her, it was difficult to understand why.

Perhaps it was idle curiosity, no more.

As he considered what to say, Hope turned slightly, looking north.

“The Shadow Realm... that is what you desire?”

Shadow flinched, feeling like his soul was laid bare in front of her. He hesitated for a moment, then bowed.

“Yes, indeed. That is why I entered your kingdom, my lady. I am merely a traveler passing through.”

Hope remained motionless, her face still hidden from view. Yet, Shadow felt as if he glimpsed a subtle smile woven out of starlight, glinting in the strange darkness that his sight could not pierce.

“Little shadow, you seem to have forgotten who you are. Do you not wish to remember? If so, I will respect your desire.”

Suddenly, she was standing just a step away from Shadow, peering into the depths of his being. He felt impossibly small under her gaze... but strangely enough, her attention was not overbearing and crushing. Instead, it was gentle and soothing as a cool spring.

”But are you sure that you want to face a god? Gods are the reason you are not meant to exist, after all.”

Shadow trembled, but forced himself to remain still. He did not really understand what the Demon of Desire meant... but it seemed that she meant him no harm, at least.

As for her question...

Shadow’s lips slowly twisted into a crooked smile.

“And yet they are the reason I do exist. So, I think gods owe me an explanation.”

A gust of wind blew across the world, and the tip of War God’s spear seemed to glisten in the starlight. Hope’s laughter resounded in the darkness, pleasing like the murmur of a clear brook.

”If so, I will not stop you. Go, little shadow... you have my blessing. May it help your wishes come true.”

As those words settled in the silence of the night, Shadow felt the world shifting once again, obeying the radiant daemon. Hope’s curiosity seemed to be sated. Sparing him one last glance, she turned, as if wanting to leave.

”Wait!”

Shadow himself was surprised by his impulsive call. He froze, startled by the sound of his own voice, as well as by the indescribable longing that awoke in his soul when I saw her leave.

Hope did linger for a moment.

He struggled to contain himself for a moment, then asked in a tense, trembling voice:

”Why... why are you here? Why do you live among humans? Why did you build a kingdom for them, and why do you protect them from the harshness of the world?”

He did not understand. He could not understand. Even if Shadow was not a god, he had experienced what being worshipped like a god felt like. How deeply it hurt, how inescapable the pain of knowing humans was.

How distasteful human natures were. Whatever he had experienced, Hope would have experienced a thousandfold.

So why would she subject herself to this hideousness, to this torment?

Hope hesitated for a brief moment, then answered in her nebulous, spellbinding voice:

”Because I am lonely.”

Turning to Shadow, she laughed quietly.

“All of us are. Isn’t that why you are here? Mirage has her illusions; Rime has her flowers. Ariel has his queen, while Nether has his goddess. But I only have humans. I love humans, because they are children of the Flame... and therefore, my children as well.”

Shadow shook his head in dismay.

Usually, his emotions would not have been so unbridled — but in the presence of Hope, it was impossible to be insincere.

So, he could not stop himself from objecting.

”But they are so fleeting. As soon as you allow them into your heart, they are gone, leaving you bleeding. How do you save yourself from having to suffer?”

Hope remained motionless.

Her answer was gentle, as if she was explaining something obvious to a naive child.

”I simply suffer.”

She seemed to smile.

“Why would I save myself from sorrow? When I am happy, I savor joy. When I am heartbroken, I savor sorrow. One cannot exist without the other, so only those who know sorrow can experience joy. Little shadow... do you wish to live in a world devoid of happiness?”

Shadow hesitated, then shook his head slowly.

Hope nodded.

“Then do not save yourself from sorrow.”

He gritted his teeth, raising his chin in defiance.

“Then what about fury? Human hearts are so hideous, so vile. The crimes they commit are abhorrent; and what is worse, they will commit them in your name. They will desecrate everything that is holy and spoil everything that is pure... there is no end to their ambition, their lust, their greed! When you see all the dirty, dark desires that hide in their hearts, don’t you want to erase them from existence and be spared their depravity?”

The Demon of Desire gazed at him with an emotion that resembled pity.

”Your two friends, the young wolf pup and the lost soul... are they hideous? Are they vile? Do you feel fury when you are with them, and do you want to erase them from existence?”

Shadow hesitated, then slowly shook his head.

Hope seemed to smile.

“Humans and gods... all of us are creatures of Desire. Some desires are noble, some are banal, some are twisted and vile. Such is the world. Humans are no different from gods, and gods are no different from humans. If I were to be furious with humans, shouldn’t I feel the same fury toward the gods?”

She shook her head slightly.

“Above all of it, there is choice. Some make the choice to be vile, while some make the choice to be noble. That is what separates us, beings of the Flame — of Desire — from those who have become Corrupted. Because Corruption is the thief of choice.”

As the stars glistened in the distant sky, Hope shifted, enjoying the warm breeze.

“But not all beings of the Flame are afforded the privilege of making choices, or even knowing that there is a choice. So, all I want to do is help humans learn what they are choosing and help them be in a position to choose. Then, most of them will make the most radiant choices...”

As the warm breeze reached Shadow, she seemed to smile.

”...That is my hope.”

Shadow stared at her, motionless.

Wasn’t she saying that she could tolerate the darker side of humanity... for no other reason than that she desired them to choose light?

Because she simply wanted to?

What kind of answer was that?!

Shadow gritted his teeth and then uttered:

“But those humans! Even if gods can endure living in their company, can they endure living alongside gods? Can they survive in the shadow of divinity, doomed to always be lesser, to know that all the things they desire and can never possess belong to someone else?”

Hope studied him silently for a long while. Eventually, she turned to leave.

”Then what about us, little shadow? You and I... don’t we exist in the shadow of divinity, knowing that all the things we desire belong to someone else?”

As her nebulous figure disappeared like a fleeting dream, the last echo of her voice caressed his ear like a soothing whisper:

“Don’t we daemons live alongside the gods? If we can, why can’t humans?”

A moment later, it was as if she had never been in front of him at all.

Shadow was left alone, standing beneath the statue of War God.

Looking at the bleeding human heart she held in her hand.

He remained silent for a long while, staring at the sharp spear held in the statue’s other hand.

Eventually, he asked quietly:

”Can we?”