Second Life as a Soldier

“What is it?” I asked Peter.

If he was interrupting me, it had to be important.

“We need to talk in private,” Peter said, pointing at Halvar.

I nodded, and we made our way to the back of the house.

“So, what’s going on? What’s so urgent?” I asked.

“Silas sent an urgent message. It is bad news,” Peter said with a sigh. “He overheard an argument between Sergeant Victor and Sergeant Rowan after the construction meeting ended. We do not know all the details, since he only managed to hear part of the conversation, but from what he heard, if you do not execute Halvar tomorrow, Sergeant Rowan will try to take combat authority from you.”

“Fuck.” I punched the closest wall in frustration. “Do all of them agree with this?”

“From the sound of it, Sergeant Victor does not, I am not sure about the other sergeants. For Sergeant Aaron, it is a great opportunity to shift the blame away from his squad and onto you. If Sergeant Victor and Colin support you, you would still have a fighting chance. We might even be able to convince Sergeant Caleb if we have two sergeants supporting us.”

I just shook my head. “Colin will not support me. What if I execute Halvar?”

“Then I think nothing changes. Most likely, Sergeant Rowan will not be able to challenge your authority again.”

“Because I will prove that I can be ruthless and kill people when the situation demands?” I asked.

“Yes. Also, if he keeps bringing up this type of issue, the other sergeants will lose confidence in him, and you can mention it to the higher officers in a future report, informing them that Sergeant Rowan is breaking the chain of command established by the captain,” Peter replied.

I sighed and leaned against the wall. Then, looking at the ceiling, I said, “Can I report Sergeant Rowan right now?”

“You can definitely try, but first you will have to prove that Halvar was not behind the fire. Otherwise, going to them will not help you. Even if you do not report Sergeant Rowan, other reports will indicate that during the mission, Sergeant Rowan took over command of the combat unit. Without proving Halvar’s innocence, command will only think Sergeant Rowan had good insight and made the right call, while you might get a reputation as someone who is soft. That would only harm your career.”

He was right, and it was not like I had time to investigate and prove Halvar’s innocence. I would either have to execute him tomorrow or live with the consequences of leaving him alive.

There was a possibility that, over time, I could find out who was responsible for the fire and prove Halvar was not involved, but the chances of doing so were limited, and I could not count on them.

That same evening, I called my whole squad together. We had watch duty in just thirty minutes, so we had transferred Halvar to Victor’s squad, and I had yet to decide what to do with him.

Leaving him alive could end my career in the army. Gaining a reputation as someone who hesitated against humans, especially when the army mostly fought humans, would not be good for me. I might still remain in the army, but it would stall my progress and hinder my future class and cultivation growth, which was the only reason I had joined the army in the first place.

But killing him just to save myself felt just as hard.

Even if I ignored my modern principles, which gave me a long list of reasons not to kill a man I believed to be innocent, killing him would also make me similar to the nobles of this world, who killed and exploited people weaker than themselves for their own benefit.

That was why I had called my squad. I hoped their opinions would help me make a decision. After explaining the situation to them, I waited for their replies.

“I would say kill him,” Varric replied without hesitation, catching everyone by surprise. He was the first to speak, while the rest of the squad was still trying to process what I had just said.

I looked at Varric, waiting for him to explain further.

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“What? If you are looking for a reason, I don’t have one. People die every day. I do not care about one sorry old man when his death is good for us,” Varric replied with a shrug.

Honestly, I was not surprised by Varric’s reply. It was my mistake to even think, for a second, that I would receive any helpful answer from him.

Peter shifted uncomfortably at Varric’s words, but after thinking for a second, he replied, “I hate to say this, Sergeant, but I somewhat agree with Varric. Leaving Halvar alive carries huge risks. Even if we do not consider the effect on your career, what are we supposed to do if we do not execute him? We cannot keep him imprisoned here. That would require a squad to keep watch over him. We also cannot simply let him go. He was recently assaulted by the village head, and young warriors are supporting him. If we release him and he causes problems, all the blame will fall on you.”

Wow. Peter had a knack for making my job difficult. If he had made the same argument as Varric, I would have made up my mind to release Halvar, but now I had to consider Halvar’s actions and what he might do after I released him.

“I would say we release him, or at least let him live,” Kael said, joining the conversation. “This squad has become a place for people who were left to die. I do not want us to be responsible for killing someone like us. If I could make this decision, I would free him right now. I know what it feels like to stand up for people who cannot fight for themselves. I also know what happens to those people when the person protecting them is no longer there. If Rowan’s plan works, then after we leave this village, any native who raises his head against the village head will die without anyone knowing.”

I could feel Kael was speaking from his past experience, but this was not the time to delve into Kael’s past, because he made a point that would only make my decision harder. It looked like talking to my squad was not any help either.

“Sergeant, I do not know much about the world or the army, but if we can save some people’s lives, we should do it. In the mines, my brother and I were always getting bullied. This village head looks like a bully to me, so I will always oppose him. But if you think killing Halvar is right, I am okay with that,” Rokan said, while his brother Daren nodded.

The rest of my squad remained neutral about the decision. Garran, Brakk, and Oren just shrugged, not caring whether Halvar lived or died.

I dismissed the meeting, and we went on duty for the night watch.

I spent the whole night cursing my squadmates, Rowan, and all the other sergeants. Rowan and the other sergeants for putting me in this position, and my squadmates for confusing me even more.

But it also gave me a moment to think about how much times had changed. Three years ago, even decisions like where and when I would sleep were made by instructors at camp. Now, here I was, making life-and-death decisions not just for my squad members, but also for civilians.

The next day, as soon as I was returning from my watch, the sergeants stopped me on the way to my house.

“Are you ready for the execution, Sergeant Edward?” Rowan asked with a raised eyebrow and a slight smile on his face.

I sighed. “No, we will not be executing him,” I said, my voice firm.

I might have been confused in the beginning about what decision to make, but a whole night of thinking had made me decide one thing: I was not going to make a decision that would keep me awake every night. If I suffered because of it, so be it. One of the reasons Walter had trained me was because I cared for the conscripts in my squad. I cared for my people even when there was no benefit to me, and he had asked me to keep doing so even when I rose in rank.

If I started hesitating when I was just a sergeant, what would I do when I had more authority? So I decided this would be the last time I hesitated over these types of decisions. Killing was part of the job, but I would not start killing innocent people just because it was the easy choice.

“So you suggest we release Halvar?” Rowan asked, smiling from ear to ear.

“No. He will become part of my squad until we find out who was responsible for the fire. I believe he is innocent, but if he really did start the fire, we can execute him later. If he is innocent, I will dismiss him from the squad,” I said, making sure Rowan understood this was not a suggestion.

“You will take a fifty-year-old man into your squad?” Rowan asked with a scoff. “Not happy with your perfect record?”

“No. If you have forgotten, my squad is a death squad, a place built for criminals. Even if he is old, there is nothing stopping me from conscripting him into my squad.”

Including him in my squad was an easy decision. By doing so, I would stop him from taking revenge on the village head, and I would gain a guide who knew this village, its people, and the surrounding area intimately.

I was also betting on the other side making another mistake before our mission ended. It was true that Halvar was not fit for my squad in his current condition. He was a hunter, but he was old, while most of my squad members were young or physically fit. Out in the wild, he would likely struggle to keep up for even five days.

Still, keeping him alive created more opportunities. If Halvar remained alive, the village head, or whoever had started the fire, might try something else. And if they did, it would give us a better chance of catching the people responsible.

“Then I am sorry to inform you, Sergeant Edward, but we all decided that leaving you in charge of command decisions puts the whole mission at risk,” Rowan said. “You are soft toward barbarians. You proved that when you asked us not to call them what they are. Then, even when stones were thrown at you, you did nothing to punish them. Now, you are allowing the person who started the fire to live, the leader of the barbarians and the man responsible for most of our problems.”

He took a step closer, his smile widening.

“We cannot allow you to continue making combat decisions if you are too scared to make the hard ones.”