The Chimera Summoner

Ch 12– 

The boss room opened up in a roughly circular cave, dotted with glowing blue mushrooms. In the center stood Brawly, twirling a lime green pool noodle. 

On her breastplate was a big sign with the words ‘boss rat’ crossed out followed by the word RATBOSS. This one was circled and underlined. 

Good. Wouldn’t want to mix those up. 

She waved enthusiastically as we entered. 

“HEYYY!” She called. “Over here! You made it!” 

As if we could miss the huge woman in gleaming plate armor. My heart sunk. There was no way we could beat someone with nearly eighty levels on us. Not even this goofball. 

“Welcome to the final room!” She went on. “Beyond are the lifts that will take you to campus! Plus there’s LOOT! All you have to do is beat the boss!” 

She jabbed two thumbs into her sign, carefully avoiding the crossed out words and emphasizing the circled one. 

“I was supposed to get a level one boss for you.” She whispered, conspiratorially. “But that would be troublesome. Dungeon doesn’t like when you steal it’s stuff. So you get me instead! SO LUCKY!” 

Yeah. Lucky. To get our asses beat by an ascendant Wayfinder. The dream. 

Brawly continued, now listing on her fingers, “You win if you hit me enough times, you can use ANY tactics you want on me, I won’t kill you… anything else?” 

“Any tactics we want?!” I probed. 

“Literally whatever you want. Go nuts.” Nodded Brawly. “I’d love nothing more than if you could surprise me. In fact, for a bonus prize, do something I haven’t seen before.” 

She gave us a thumbs up. 

“Careful what you wish–” Jennie started. 

I jabbed an elbow into her ribs. 

“You’ll be simulating a boss fight from the first floor?” Asked Jennie, batting me away with her hands. 

“RATBOSS!” Nodded Brawly, happy. 

“So you’ll be toning all of this…” Jennie indicated Brawly. “Down to level one.” 

“Down to RATBOSS!” nodded Brawly, happy as a golden retriever with a bone.

She whipped the pool noodle around so fast I thought it might disintegrate. 

Fuck. Brawly was going to kill us. 

For the millionth time, I watched my dream of attending Bayloft die before my eyes. 

Jennie turned to me. 

“Ok, let’s make a plan.” She muttered under her breath. 

“Ah, ahh!” Scolded Brawly. “Should’ve done that ahead of time!” 

She blurred and reappeared right next to us. The noodle smashed across me and Jennie, sending us flying like a home run. 

“RATBOSS!!” She yelled, gleefully. 

I landed, winded, and coughed.

Jennie recovered better, rolling and skidding to her feet. She freed her long knives, snarling. She vanished in a puff of white smoke as she activated her stealth ability. 

“Sneaky wayfinder! Sniff sniff, sniff sniff!” Brawly commentated her own exaggerated actions. Then whirled and bonked Jennie on the head as she reappeared behind her. 

Jennie reeled back in surprise, holding her forehead. 

“What the fuck?!” Demanded Jennie. “That’s not fair, a first floor boss wouldn’t—“ 

Brawly bashed her again. “Sneaky rogue gets aggro for complaining!”

Then she charged. 

Jennie yelped, and skittered away. 

Soon it was a bizarre reversal of cat and mouse, Jennie fleeing at top speed, with Brawly traipsing along after her periodically swiping dramatically with the pool noodle. 

I’d caught my breath from the initial assault enough to concentrate on magic. I called Lucy, and while she formed, I threw a heal at Jennie who was rapidly accumulating bruises. 

Luckily, she managed to keep any signs of arousal to herself.

“Booo! Healers are no fun!” Brawly yelled, sounding disappointed. She shifted focus to me. 

Brawly barrelling towards me felt a lot like standing in front of a runaway train. 

In desperation, I tried throwing my heal at her. 

She slowed and watched curiously as the gold light swirled around her. 

“You want to heal the RATBOSS?!” She shook her head. 

Then it hit her.

“AHHHHAHAHAHAHA!” Brawly squirmed. “WOW! SOOOO weird! Valant was right about you!! This is NOT what I thought she meant.” 

Then she grinned. “I’ll have to get you back for that inappropriate tactic.”

My blood ran cold. 

Luckily, at that very instant, Lucy’s foot crashed into the side of Brawly’s face. Jennie appeared on the other side, daggers flashing out. 

Brawly vanished, wind whipping around the circular cave as she reappeared a few feet to the side. 

Lucy and Jennie narrowly avoided attacking each other, in Brawly’s sudden absence. 

“OHHH!” Brawly howled in mock pain. “RATBOSS BLEEDS!!” She shook her head and roared. 

Then she produced a black marker, and made a solemn tick mark on her shining chest plate, just under the sign. 

“Sorry! You good?” Jennie asked Lucy, who’d nearly been skewered by her daggers. 

Lucy blinked, looked at Brawly, then at me. Then keeled over with a pitiful whimper. She draped herself dramatically over the rocks like a swimsuit model, and held up a foot, shaking it. 

“I need healing!” She cried. Then looked expectantly at me. 

“NOT THE TIME, LUCY?!” I roared. 

Lucy pouted and plaintively shook her limp foot again.

“You’re fucking joking me. This is a farce.” Grumbled Jennie. 

Brawly reappeared in a gust, over Lucy. 

“I get it, girlie.” Said Brawly. “That spell feels GOOD! Don’t you worry, I’ll help!” 

She brought the pool noodle crashing down on Lucy’s petrified form like a meteor from heaven. 

“YOWWWWWWCH!” Lucy cried, scampering away holding her ass. 

“Can you two take this seriously?!” I yelled. 

Jennie looked scandalized. 

“They’re doing ok.” Defended Brawly. 

“I’m talking to YOU.” I jabbed a finger at Brawly. “And YOU.” A jab at Lucy, who stuck out her bottom lip and gave me huge puppy dog eyes. “I’m not getting kicked out of Bayloft just because you two clowns were too busy fucking around.” 

Brawly got a gleam in her eye. “Oh you wanna fight for real, little support??” 

Oh fuck. 

Brawly was on me before I could–

POW! 

The noodle battered my arms, and legs in a brutal, bruising barrage as I frantically tried to protect my head. 

POWPOWPOW!!

I’d never done much consideration as to how I might die. But death by flotation device would have been low on my list of preferences. Very low. 

I swiped a [tempest strike] at her, only hit air, and received several sharp blows to the head as a reward. 

I stumble-dove backwards. Somehow, Brawly was already there, cackling madly. Her soft training sword played a staccato rhythm on my body as she tapped me with impunity. 

“I was actually a drummer in a band while I was at Bayloft!” Brawly bragged, conversationally. 

I was vaguely aware of her fending off attacks from both my companions as I scrambled to stay on my feet. 

“We were called Brawly and the bammin’ slammin’ band band!” She reminisced. “Those were the days. Ohh you got me!!” 

One of Jennie’s daggers had finally clipped Brawly, by the finest of margins. 

Brawly vanished and reappeared in the center of the arena, dutifully checking another tick mark on her armor. 

“One to go!” She said encouragingly. 

Good. Good to know what our goal was, at least. 

~~~~~~~~