Forty Millenniums of Cultivation

Seeing the serious expression on Jade’s face, Theresa turned serious, too.

She was deep in thought.

“Makes sense. The pattern of a strong artificial intelligence’s relationship should be different from that of an ordinary human being. Even if it was an ordinary person, it would be impossible for them to fool our Liu Li. Therefore, I have to thoroughly understand this pattern in order to expose the deceit of the big pig, the Fist King.”

Theresa was pacing back and forth in the wine cellar. She thought for a moment, and her face collapsed again. “Jade, the plan you proposed is impractical. Should I go to the boxing champion and ask him how he fooled the girls?”

“Can’t I?”

Jade said solemnly, “The Fist King is a good friend of yours and has taught you a lot of magic. Why don’t you approach him as a friend and ask for more information before you attack him?”

“Of course not. It would’ve been fine if I had been patient all the way. But just now, I went to seek revenge from the Fist King in a rage. Now, I went to ask him to be my friend as if nothing had happened, and I even asked him to teach me the secret arts to pursue girls. Wouldn’t it be weird? It would be a miracle if he told me!”

Theresa was distressed. “Ah, it’s all my fault. I was too impulsive. If only I hadn’t been in such a hurry to flash the giant cannon just now.”

“That’s true.”

Jade walked to Theresa’s back quietly. Her slender hands, which were made of liquid metal, reached the most comfortable temperature for human beings. She pressed Theresa’s temples softly like feathers and massaged her.

Theresa was used to the service of jade and moaned in pleasure.

“Don’t blame yourself. It’s not your fault but mine.”

Jade took the opportunity to move close to Theresa’s ear and said softly, “I’m sorry, Captain. My bad ideas often fool you, but please believe me when I say that I did not do it on purpose. I did it out of the kindness of my heart. It was just a useless artificial intelligence that has been hibernating for too long and lost most of its core data. Now and then, it malfunctioned.”

Hearing her words, Theresa was somewhat embarrassed.

“Don’t say that. It’s not a big deal. I’m an iron man who has seen too many storms to care about them.

Theresa waved her hands and suddenly thought of something. Her eyes bulged. “Wait. What did you just say? You are—”

“I’m a stupid, useless artificial intelligence who makes mistakes all the time,” Jade said, lowering her head.

“No, no, no. The beginning is not important. The last four words are the most important. Jade, you are also an artificial intelligence, just like the boxing champion!” Theresa jumped up in joy, as if she had discovered a blind spot.

There was confusion on Jade’s face. “So?”

“Therefore, you know a thing or two about the tricks that the boxing champion knows to fool girls, don’t you?”

Theresa patted Jade’s shoulder in excitement. “Well, we’ve been searching high and low for you. We don’t need to sneak to the boxing champion at all. We can find you directly and find out everything.”

Jade hesitated. “Well…”

“Stop this and that. Let’s be straightforward!”

Theresa said, “Come on, Jade. Tell me all the ten thousand ways that artificial intelligence can fool girls!”

“I don’t.”

Jade lowered her head and said somewhat unhappily, “Captain, please don’t confuse me with the boxing champion. He is an evil artificial intelligence, and I am a kind-hearted artificial intelligence despite my stupidity. Only the evil artificial intelligence will deceive girls. Our kind-hearted artificial intelligence will never resort to deception when it comes to love. We will be sincere, too.

“Alright, alright, alright. It’s my fault. Can you not put on such a bitter expression? Our family’s good jade is ten thousand times better than the big pig trotter, the boxing champion.”

Theresa said, “Then you will tell me the details of your previous dating methods sincerely, won’t you?”

“This is useless.”

Still, Jade shook her head. “The power of language is feeble. It’s just talk. There’s not much difference between us dating and human beings dating. It’s nothing more than eating, sending flowers, shopping, and so on. There are a lot of details that can only be understood but not conveyed.

“Besides, I’ve been hibernating for a long time, and I’ve lost a lot of emotional data. I can’t remember many advanced methods right now. I’m afraid that I can only recall them when I’m in a real relationship.

“Therefore, I’m sorry, captain. I can’t help you.

“Don’t—don’t be like this, Jade. My good Jade!”

It was not easy for Theresa to find a chance to counterattack. There was no way that she was going to give it up easily. She shook the jadeite’s hand like a rascal and said, “Just help me. Just help me. I know that you are the kindest and smartest artificial intelligence in the entire universe. You will definitely remember all the ways to pursue girls!

“As for the details that can only be understood but can’t be explained in words, right, talk is cheap. How about you try all the methods on me, Jade?”

Jade froze.

He seemed to be surprised by Theresa’s brilliant idea.

“How… can this be?”

Jade shook her head and said firmly, “I cannot deceive your feelings.”

“Nonsense. Our Liu Li is an ignorant little girl. The boxing champion took advantage of her ignorance. This is called deception.”

Theresa waved her little fists. “But you are so kind and honest, Jade. You’ve told me everything that you know. Besides, it was me who asked you to perform it. How is it cheating? It’s consensual.

“Yes. I feel more and more that I’m a genius for coming up with such a brilliant idea.

“First of all, this kind of personal experience is definitely more powerful than words. It will help me better grasp the pattern of artificial intelligence dating.

“Secondly, didn’t you lose a lot of emotional data? It doesn’t matter. I will help you find it. The boxing champion has 10,000 ways to fool girls. If we can figure out 10,000 of them together, we will definitely be better than him.

“Thirdly, and most importantly, Liu Li and I will have a common language! You see, when I go to Liu Li and tell him that I’m with an artificial intelligence, there will be a lot of topics that we can talk about. After all, we are the only two couples in the entire Pangu Universe in such a forbidden relationship, aren’t we?

“While we were talking, I talked to Liu Li about the emotional deceptions of the artificial intelligence. She wouldn’t have thought that I was bluffing, and she wouldn’t have thought that I was trying to prove the Fist King’s evilness with your kindness. Liu Li would definitely have been rescued from the fire pit!

Jade listened quietly without commenting.

“Hey, say something, will you?” Theresa pouted.

“It sounds reasonable, but there is one small problem,” Jade said.

“What question?” Theresa blinked.

“I don’t want to,” Jade said calmly.

“Why? Jade, are you not willing to help me?” Theresa felt wronged.

“I am a kind artificial intelligence. I may be stupid, but I am also very stubborn. No matter what, I cannot lie to a human being, especially the feelings of my captain.

Jade said, “Besides, when our artificial intelligence is in a relationship, many of our moves are very lethal. I’m afraid that you might not be able to hold on and get hurt.

“I cannot deceive or hurt my captain. It is a rule written in my most fundamental logic. I cannot break it. I’m sorry, Captain.

“Why are you so inflexible? I told you that it was not deception but consensual!”

Theresa was so anxious that she was stomping her feet. “Besides, do you not believe me at all? I am Mr. Han, the king of cannons in the sea of stars. How many girls have I picked up? What kind of situation have I not seen? Why would I be scared of your tricks? Are you kidding me?”

“Come on, Jade. I’ll let it go if you don’t bring it up today. But now that we’ve reached this point, you must try everything on me. Let’s see what methods the artificial intelligence has!”

No matter what she said, Jade simply turned around and ignored her.

She was still baring her fangs and brandishing her claws. Jade simply packed up the wine glasses and bottles that were scattered on the ground and prepared to leave the wine cellar.

“Don’t go, Jade!”

Theresa was anxious. “Is it really impossible? Are you really not willing to help me at all?”

“I really can’t. I won’t break the vow.”

Jade was already walking to the door. She paused for a moment and said, “Unless, of course, you command me as the captain to carry out the mission as if it were a battle mission of Jade. Battle commands are the highest commands that are above all rules.

“Right, why didn’t I think of that?”

The drunk girl knocked her head hard and declared proudly with her hands on her hips, “I command you as the captain of Jade right now. Jade, stop dawdling and show me all your tricks to fool girls… Ah!”

Before he could finish his sentence, he exclaimed.

But Jade retreated with unbelievable agility and picked up the slightly drunk Theresa again.

“Gulp.”

Jade took a sip of wine.

An affectionate smile appeared on his mature and intellectual face.

“I really don’t know what to do with you, captain. Let’s begin then. The 1,352th move of the Artificial Intelligence’s romance.”

She took another sip of wine.

But he didn’t.

The wine was as glamorous as a ruby when it touched her lips.

Theresa was somewhat panicked. She stammered, “Wait. Why didn’t you start with the first move?”

“Because I personally prefer it, Captain.”

With half a mouthful of wine in her mouth, Jade leaned close to Theresa’s burning earlobe and mumbled.