Weapons of Mass Destruction

Chapter 887: How long remains?

“How long remains?”

“Three hours or so.”

“Well, that’s awkward.”

“Fuck you.”

“As someone with such feeble stats, I would try not to be so… punchable right now.”

“I’ve spent more years honing my martial arts than your entire civilization has existed.”

“There’s a meme I feel might ap-”

“I will punch you.”

“Typical woman when she’s losing an argument.”

“Something tells me you would be burned at the stake if anyone from Earth had heard what you just said.”

“I usually only subject myself to my lamest jokes. And I’ve been threatened with worse. And look, I’m not good at these things, so I mostly just default to my normal self. I don’t know what else to say to… well… you know… help with these sorts of things.”

“What you’re doing now is okay… I appreciate it.”

“Enough to unlock mid pristine rarity in my system shop?”

“Dream on.”

“As expected. Is Diligence dealing with the situation?”

“Him, Humility, Temperance, and Patience.”

“Are you going to get shouted at?”

“It’s okay. Long term, I did more than any of them. I deserve to take a break once in a while.”

“So, yes?”

“They’ll be reminding me of this for decades.”

“And what happens now?”

“I don’t know.”

“You what?”

“I mean, I have ideas, and we’ve prepared some contingencies for them to choose from. But as I said, I am currently entirely without my powers. Even summoning you here was triggered by a pre-charged item with. I can’t even see what is happening outside.”

“I can respect that. And this place? I was always curious, but I’ve never asked.”

“It is usually called a Sanctuary. You can start working on your own as a peak Absolute. If you get there.”

“Is that an official name, or can I choose my own?”

“You do not like it?”

“Not that much. It sounds like the sort of place you run to when you’re powerless to do anything else.”

“…”

“And now you’ve gotten quiet. Did it bring up a thought you never considered?”

“Just shut up.”

“I swear, some of you look even more inept than I thought. Like you’ve never given anything any proper thought and just tend to roll with things.”

“What a stupid and arrogant thing to say, coming from someone younger than most of my clothes.”

“It’s your own fault that you can’t just get with the times and modernize your fashion.”

“I will punch you.”

“Oh no! Granny, please, don’t! You’ll only tear your clothes, which, as you’ve said, are oh so ol-ouch… what are you…doing? You asshole, do you think I won’t fight back!? Ouch. Stop! No, no, not my right arm, break the left!… Ouch, I will stop, I’ll stop. I was only joking!”

“I warned you.”

“What the fuck were those movements? Are you a mantis or something? But I bet I could beat you if I’d spent 700 days in mental training instead of 690.”

“You could not.”

“I could not, but it is a nice thought. Do you have more of that tasty wine?”

“You shattered it all.”

“I would never. You must be wrong, it had to be someone else. By the way… was it really that expensive?”

“Yes.”

“Fuuuuuuck.”

“I’d been saving some of them for hundreds of years.”

“I could use a rag to wipe some from the floor and squeeze it into the glass. Do you think I would be able to sell it then?”

“I don’t think that someone with that kind of wealth would go so low as to drink it, even if it were that rare.”

“I would not tell them about the rag-squeezing part.”

“Be my guest then.”

“Okay, okay… damn, some of them are mixed together. Oh, can you give me a piece of your sleeve or something? I cannot use my clothes as they are not that clean and-”

“Sure.”

“Oh, a big piece of your sleeve, wow, the cloth feels nice. Is it expensive?”

“Yes. If I see you trying to sell it as something the Ruler of Greed used to wear, I will kill you.”

“I would never-”

“Do not lie to me.”

“Okay, okay, maybe I would, but why do you have to be such an ass about it? It’s not like it will cost you anything.”

A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

“I will punch you.”

“I bet Kindness wouldn’t mind… ouch, ouch, my arm, my arm! How are you so fast?! I said break the left one if you have to! I was joking, I was joking. Look, look, I’m even wiping your floor now. Do you have any vials I could use? In one of the drawers of your table, maybe?”

“Each of the drawers is a Spatial Cache.”

“What?”

“You heard what I said. Though the compression isn’t all that high. It was gifted to me long ago.”

“Is it not… too expensive?”

“Are you saying that such a nice gift is wasted on me?”

“Now you’re hearing things again. Why would you not rather have a few more pouches or a purse you could carry with you?”

“It’s spatially locked to my Sanctuary, so they could omit some of the enchantments, and that made the production simpler and faster. But yes, it is very valuable.”

“How valuable?”

“You truly are an avaricious person, are you not?”

“I don’t even know what that word means.”

“Someone with an obsessive desire for wealth.”

“Oh. Not really then? In the end, it is all just things that come and go. They might be useful at times, though, and if I have an opportunity, why would I not use them?”

“I’ve seen your records.”

“My actions do not make my words untrue, if anything, they confirm them.”

“I guess.”

“Plus, I just asked for some vials, and you started bragging unprompted. So, doesn’t that make you the ever-vicious person here?”

“I will punch you.”

“Was that a smile? It was, wasn’t it? Do you also like a good dad joke? And when I say lame, it is not to put it down. I am someone who highly appreciates them.”

“...you have a pretty smile.”

“My mom used to say that when I smiled, I looked like the happiest little gremlin to ever live.”

“That is a very good comparison. I think it just looks so true and honest I can’t help but feel my eyes pulled to it. You know, like it’s not hiding an ulterior motive, nor is it forced. Just a pure, happy smile.”

“I guess. Though, tell me that when I start smiling in the middle of a fight at the next guy who’s pissed me off.”

“I guess you have two kinds of smiles then. I just know which one I like more.”

“If you’ve decided to flirt with me, you could at least give me a vial or a few bottles of that drink.”

“There are trillions of men that would fall at my feet if I wanted them to-”

“Here you go, bragging again.”

“-much nicer men. Much more handsome men. Much more stable and reasonable men. And among them, millions of them with more power than you-”

“This is starting to get rude.”

“-so why would I flirt with you?”

“If you say so.”

“Moreover, you donʼt look like youʼve got long left, so why waste my precious time? Five more years? Maybe you can stretch it out to seven?”

“Something like that.”

“It seems we’re in a similar position. Still won’t tell me what you’re planning?”

“Nope.”

“Have it your way then.”

“I will. What about Lissandra?”

“She… she went somewhere, and we can’t track her anymore. We suspect it’s one of her repositories that may have remained undiscovered ever since the fall of Eladore.”

“One even you don’t know about?”

“I wasnʼt privy to all of Master Lissandraʼs secrets. There were surely armories and laboratories she kept isolated from Eladore, because of the dangers they hid.”

“Even to a planet like Eladore?”

“Not the planet. Eladore’s one of the most powerful in the universe. It was more likely because of the dangers to the population.”

“Isn’t that kind of fucked up, given that the average Champion there was generally powerful enough to defeat an Absolute?”

“It is, as you said, fucked up.”

“Well, I should have expected that. And what does it mean to say that the planet is powerful?”

“I want to ask you one thing before I answer.”

“Go ahead.”

“During your conversation with her, you mentioned that place is yours. Then, instead of heading straight to Eladore, she went to some other place to stay there until her body accepted her new heart. Were you talking about Eladore?”

“Yup. If you wanted it, you would already have taken it, so don’t change your mind now.”

“I would never… but as for your answer, a more powerful planet mainly means it is more durable. On Eladore, for example, I could walk with my presence fully unleashed, in my true body without it breaking the planet. If I did that on your planet, just my presence alone would cause catastrophic damage, and after a while, it would exterminate all life. On powerful planets that have gone through many pairings and other sorts of strengthenings, our power spreads slower. There’s much more ambient mana, the planets are bigger, the materials you can gather there are much higher quality, and the animals become more powerful.”

“What would happen if you moved all people from Earth to Eladore or if they paired now?”

“Nothing good. Currently, as they are now, all of them would die, other than people who’ve been through the tutorial, the ones clearing dungeons, or those leveling up.”

“Well, I’ll think of something. Can an Absolute aid that process?”

“How annoying.”

“What?”

“You always ask the right sort of questions. Many of my disciples didn’t even think to ask many of them. And yes, if the pairing is in progress and you kill an enemy Absolute, you can aid the process through the Sovereign Spark. The enemy world’s spark will cooperate with you until someone else claims it or until it merges with your world’s and fully comes under your control. Powerful Absolutes can, through a Sovereign Spark, shift the continents during the Pairing. You can put all the continents of both worlds next to each other or separate them with a sea and then take over the other world’s territory. Without their Absolute, it’s an easy thing to do. Though, if anyone does that, be careful. Sometimes Absolutes separate them by such distances so they can destroy them without hurting the people from their own.”

“That is fucked up.”

“I did that once.”

“I… I see.”

“I was young, much weaker then. It was after Master Lissandra died and before I became a Ruler. They killed many of the people I befriended. It was so easy, I had already killed their Absolute, and no one could face me. I offered them mercy, but they still tried to poison the planet and fought until the last moment. I don’t even remember the planet’s name.”

“I would probably do the same.”

“Would you now?”

“Likely. So, how much time is left?”

“Quite a while,” she says, and as I sit on the armrest of her chair, she rests her head against me.

I don’t push her away, and we stay like this. I even reach out and caress the back of her head, curious about what expression she might be making under her hair.

The rest of the time we stay like that, occasionally throwing in a sentence or two to fill the silence. Usually just silly things, but once in a while, things that feel like we couldn’t tell anyone else.

I think I know what she meant when she said she’s in a similar position to me, but even now, I won’t push her or ask about it.

So we just talk as if we’re both making our own deathbed confessions, and I do not think we will have such a conversation ever again. Once this is over, we will go back to the way we were before. I will keep these words to myself and myself alone, and she will do the same.

I think we both believe the other is being silly or straight up stupid, though neither one says it out loud.

I also know she can use her powers. Even though she put them somewhere else, she took some of my mana to use it for telekinesis before. She could likely easily take more of it to send me away, and she used that telekinesis to reveal that to me. Giving me a slight hint that I don’t really have to stay here.

Yet, I ignore the offer and continue to pretend.