Naruto: The Shameless Uchiha Tycoon

Later that night, long after the final customer had left and the teahouse was locked tight, Ren sat alone in the dark.

He rubbed his aching shoulders, staring at the glowing blue interface of the Shinobi Tycoon System hovering in the air. Selling boba tea was highly profitable, but the war economy demanded something more substantial. Shinobi needed fast, dense energy that they could eat on the move. Sugar was a great stimulant, but calories won wars.

He navigated to the Tier 0 shop.

[Current Business Capital (BC): 450]

[AVAILABLE (TIER 0):]

[Shinobi Lunch Box Template - Cost: 150 BC]

Description: Compact, high-calorie, cheap, easy to carry, and profitable in volume.

”Purchase,” Ren said aloud into the empty room.

[150 BC DEDUCTED.]

[TEMPLATE ACQUIRED.]

A rush of culinary knowledge flooded his brain. He instantly knew the exact ratios of rice, pickled vegetables, cured meats, and dense protein cakes required to maximize shelf-life and calorie density while minimizing overhead costs.

There was just one massive problem.

I can’t do this alone, Ren thought, letting out a heavy sigh as he massaged his cramped wrists. I’m already spending fourteen hours a day shaking tea and boiling tapioca. If I try to prep fifty bentos a night on top of that, my heart is going to explode.

He needed staff.

Hiring ordinary villagers from the market district was out of the question. They were too slow, and they lacked the intense, high-pressure discipline required to survive a lunch rush. He needed ninja. But the active ninja were all deployed to the front lines.

That left only one demographic.

The next morning, Ren flipped the sign on his door to CLOSED and walked deep into the residential district of the Uchiha compound. He avoided the pristine, sprawling estates of the clan elites and navigated toward the smaller, dilapidated houses at the very edge of the walls. This was where the discharged and the crippled were quietly tucked away so as not to offend the clan’s proud aesthetic.

He walked up to a weathered porch and knocked on the sliding door.

An older Uchiha man answered. He was missing his right leg from the knee down and leaned heavily on a wooden crutch.

”Taka-san,” Ren greeted politely, offering a small bow. ”I am expanding my teahouse, and I need disciplined hands for kitchen prep. I’m offering above-market wages—”

”Kitchen prep?” Taka interrupted, his face twisting into an ugly sneer. He looked at Ren as if the boy had just spat on his shoes. ”I awakened the Sharingan at the battle of the weeping bridge! I bled for this clan! You think I survived the front lines to chop carrots for Fugaku’s disgraced failure of a son?”

Pride doesn’t pay the rent, old man, Ren thought, keeping his face perfectly neutral.

”I apologize for the insult,” Ren said flatly, turning away.

The door slammed shut with enough force to rattle the window frames.

Ren spent the next three hours going door to door. The results were universally disastrous. The Uchiha pride was a toxic, insurmountable wall. These were veterans who had lost eyes, limbs, and organs on the battlefield. The idea of trading their warrior identity for an apron was deeply humiliating to them. They would rather sit in their dusty homes and starve on meager clan pensions than work in a kitchen.

By noon, Ren was exhausted and incredibly frustrated.

Idiots, Ren grumbled internally, kicking a pebble down the dirt path. You can’t eat honor. The Hokage threw you into the meat grinder and forgot about you, and you’re still guarding your pride like it’s a treasure.

He was about to give up when he noticed a small, rundown house at the very end of the district. The roof was missing several tiles, and the weeds in the front yard were severely overgrown.

Ren walked up and knocked.

The door slid open to reveal a teenager, no older than sixteen. His dark hair was messy, his face was gaunt, and his eyes were hollow. His left sleeve was pinned up at the shoulder—his arm completely gone.

Ren recognized him. Kenji. He was a Genin who had been ambushed on a supply run just a few months ago. Because he was only a Genin when he was crippled, he didn’t have the savings, the rank, or the pension of the older veterans. He was completely broke.

”What do you want, Ren?” Kenji asked, his voice tired and entirely devoid of the arrogance the older Uchiha had shown.

Behind him, a fifteen-year-old girl limped into view, leaning heavily on a wooden cane. Her right knee was bound in thick, rigid bandages. Sayuri. Another Genin whose career had ended before it even started.

”I have a business proposition,” Ren said, not waiting for an invitation as he stepped into the cramped, poorly lit entryway.

He didn’t pitch honor. He didn’t pitch duty to the village. He walked straight to their small, empty kitchen table and placed a heavy stack of silver ryo directly onto the wood.

Kenji and Sayuri stared at the money, their eyes widening slightly.

”The village threw you away,” Ren said, his voice cold and entirely pragmatic. ”The clan gives you just enough rice to keep you from starving, but not enough to actually live. I am expanding my tea shop. I need fast hands and disciplined minds.”

”Cooking?” Kenji muttered, looking away in shame, his single hand balling into a fist. ”We’re shinobi.”

”You were shinobi,” Ren corrected brutally, refusing to sugarcoat their reality. ”Now, you are broke. I am paying double the standard wage. Paid weekly. In cash. You can sit here and guard your pride, or you can come to my shop tomorrow at dawn and actually afford to eat meat this week.”

Kenji looked at Sayuri.

She stared at the silver on the table, her jaw tightening. Unlike the older veterans, she hadn’t lived long enough with the Sharingan prestige to let it blind her to hunger. She reached out, her fingers closing firmly around a silver coin.

”Dawn,” Sayuri said, her voice hard and resolute. ”Don’t be late to open the door, kid.”

Ren smirked.

Perfect, he thought, turning toward the door. Uchiha noncombatants are finally going to see what it looks like when an heir actually pays them properly.