Back Then, I Adored You

After a while, the room became quiet again. The sound of her typing had stopped, and Gu Yusheng thought that little troublemaker must have finished texting.

She rested her head on his arm again, not moving at all.

They were the only people in the ward, and it was so quiet that he seemed to have been able to hear the sound of her breathing.

The day was bright, and the sunlight passed through the windows, shining onto the bed.

Another text message sounded twice. It was as if it were a brief, musical interlude that sent them back into the peaceful and happy mood.

Gu Yusheng was so relaxed that his body became a little sluggish. The loss of energy combined with the medicinal effects caused him to slowly lose consciousness, becoming overwhelmed by sleepiness.

As he was about to fall asleep, the girl moved her head slightly against his arm, bringing her face much closer to his.

Gu Yusheng suddenly woke up. He so badly wanted to open his eyes to take a look at what she had been reading, but his eyelids felt too heavy, as if they were being held shut by a weight. He struggled through a few attempts to open them, but he failed.

He felt her slightly cold fingers on his face, gently caressing his eyebrows and eyes, then slowly sliding down to his nose and lips.

Gu Yusheng’s body tensed up and he was left breathless, unsure of whether he was feeling nervous or aroused.

She had her hand on his face for quite a long time before moving it away, and he felt that she had moved her head closer to his.

His heart raced furiously, and his breathing became irregular. He felt the shadow of her head on his face as her soft lips very slowly and gently pressed upon his eyebrows.

In that moment, Gu Yusheng felt his blood flow suddenly stop in what felt like a fairytale.

She seemed to be a little shy as her lips trembled, resting on his forehead for quite a long time before she moved down to his eyes, laying many kisses upon his face. Her lips felt warm and soft, which made his lips curl into a smile. He felt as if he could hear flowers blooming.

She finally pressed her lips onto his.

The soft and warm feeling of her precious lips made him feel lightheaded.

She clumsily kissed him for a long time before unwillingly stopping. She tucked her head on his left shoulder right beneath his head, and her breaths had become short. She was like a cute little cat, rubbing his neck, then she whispered into his left ear. It felt more like she was blowing warm air, attempting to tickle him with her voice. “Yusheng.”

Yusheng?

The soft voice was quite different than the voice she had before, and it sounded like a completely different person.

Oh, no, little troublemaker usually sounded like Liang Doukou. Had she been trying to copy her all along? Was it her real voice that he had heard in this moment?

The voice she spoke with was soft and gentle, as attractive as her eyes.

Gu Yusheng suddenly wanted to hold her under his arm and he struggled for a while, but he could only hold her hand tighter in the end.

She seemed to feel it, and her body became stiff for a moment as she rested her head against his left shoulder, motionless. Then she moved her body closer to his, spooning Gu Yusheng.

Her eagerness and willingness to get closer to him made his heart melt. He wasn’t fully there, resting somewhere between consciousness and sleep, which made the scene like a slow-motion movie.

She was with him, as close as she could be. Her cuddling and their intimacy made him feel at peace.

Thanks

Her scent continued to float into his nose, just like a lullaby, making him gradually fall asleep when he had been excited by her touch just before.

Before he fell completely asleep, his mind was still picturing their future. He thought that after waking up, he would regain his strength and tell her in detail what had been lingering in his mind.

He had even thought of the image of her walking towards him in her wedding dress, so beautiful that he was wearing a smile in his dream.

If Gu Yusheng had known that when he woke up again after his sleep, it wouldn’t be a bright future, but a terrible end that awaited the two of them, he wouldn’t have let himself fall asleep in any case.

For a long time afterwards, he was regretful.

What he regretted was not that he had missed his appointment to see her in Shanghai in order to save the little boys, nor that he had nearly lost his life in the river because of the little boys’ actions.

What he truly regretted was that fate was fooling him. What he had believed was a beginning was an end for her.

He regretted that he had been so close to her before, when he and she might not have ever missed each other, but he had failed to grasp that small hope.

Gu Yusheng’s breaths were gradually becoming long and even. Qin Zhi’ai, who had been leaning her head on his neck for a long time, gently raised her head and looked at his sleeping face.

Her eyes didn’t blink. She was staring straight at him with extreme concentration, as if to take him into her heart.

Looking at his face, she felt a warm feeling in her eyes and seemed to have a lump in her throat. She couldn’t stay here any longer, or she would be loath to part with him.

Thinking of how she would have to leave, Qin Zhi’ai suddenly turned her head. Before she stood up, her tears fell right on the man’s lips.

His eyebrows moved slightly in his sleep, but there was no sign that he was waking up.

She bit her lower lip and suppressed the intense pain that rolled through her chest, pulling her wrist away from his grip, which had no strength because he was now asleep. Then she stood up, grabbed the bag beside him, and went to the door without looking back.

Before she reached out and opened the door, she stopped. She wanted to look back at him again, but she had no courage. She was afraid that she would lose control of her emotions, so she straightened her back and stood still for half a minute, then suddenly opened the door, went out, shut the door, fled to the stairs, and rushed out of the hospital building.

When Qin Zhi’ai was approaching the doors of the hospital, her eyes were full of tears, so she couldn’t the roads ahead clearly at all. She accidentally bumped into a man, and the other apologized to her. She just shook her head, too choked up to even be able to reply, “Never mind.” She rushed to a small alley behind the hospital where no one would pass by, then squatted down and began to cry.

She had known that there would be such a day before she had promised to be Liang Doukou’s substitute.

She had been ready before, but now, when she really needed to leave him, she found that the pain was much more intense than she had imagined.

It was so painful that she couldn’t bear it at all…

Gu Yusheng, after our farewell today, you and I will really be parted forever.

I can no longer do what I did eight years ago. At that time, even if you had gone and failed to keep your appointment with me and I had been badly hurt, I still could have had a glimmer of hope and looked forward to your return.