D.E.M.O.N.S: Getting Summoned Weekly isn't so Bad

946 Chapter 946 Pspspspspspspspsps

Kat was already making her way over to the glass door when the sound of something smacking into it was heard. Roxy looked over and was confused to see a small kitten using the back of her paw to slap the glass. Her mind supplied the recently learned knowledge that the strange looking cat was probably Lily… but the logical part of her that still hadn’t quite internalised the existence of magic was trying to work out what the weird cat was doing.

Kat opened the door and then swiftly returned to her seat, racing the cat, or at least that’s how it looked. They managed to synchronise their landings, with a bit of mental trickery to ensure they were on the same page. Kat slid down into the chair, making it look like she was lounging there the whole time, and not running a moment ago. Then in a flash Lily was also there, human form and snuggling into Kat. “Hi Roxy!” said Lily.

“You know… for someone who said just moments ago that you’re asexual… you do seem to have a fascination with pussy,” said Roxy, not a hint of shame. .

Lily went bright red, copying Vivian who didn’t want to hear such things from her mother. Kat… well Kat had expected it. Honestly, she was expecting something a bit more pointed, “Well, my name is KAT after all. The fact that I have a bit of a thing for good pussy shouldn’t be that much of a surprise,”

Roxy nodded as if this to, was an expected response. Lily was caught in the crossfire though, and started to squeak for a few moments before retreating to her cat form. Kat wasn’t going to let that chance go and started to scratch Lily behind the ears, getting her to purr. “See, my girlfriend is purring after just a second under my fingers. I’m just a poor teen, no real experience to speak of. Can you match this sort of response Roxy?”

Roxy’s gaze sharpened, “I’m afraid that with my own partner I’m much more efficient with my sharp tongue. Fingers just don’t have the same… coverage… when it comes to men. You’ll need to lean to adapt to these kinds of things, I’m sure,”

Kat shrugged, “I’m not totally sure I will. Perhaps you need to rely on escalation or an everchanging gallery of techniques to ensure the same end result but with just a few tricks I can make sure Lily is always satisfied by my company,”

“How about-” Roxy started but was cut off by Bruce.

“How about we STOP,” said Bruce firmly. “I do not want large sections of our first meeting with our grandchildren to be about sexual innuendos. This goes doubly so considering it’s also the first time we’re meeting our granddaughter’s girlfriend. Sure I can be amused by the games you play with Vivian, but she at least had her entire life to get used to us. So just… dial it back a few notches. Perhaps more than a few,”

…..

“It’s not that I don’t understand your concern Bruce… but I mean,” Roxy waves towards Kat, “At least half of these jokes right themselves. I mean, really, how can you expect me to ignore the opportunity in front of me when it was practically served right to my doorstep on a silver platter,”

“If you want to get technical about it, we came to there doorstep without warning, the fact that food has been prepared is a completely separate issue,” said Bruce, continuing the metaphor, but stretching it a bit out of shape.

Roxy sniffed, as she went take enough sip of tea, only to realise her cup was empty. Before she could comment on this Callisto was already moving over to poor her more. Roxy gave Callisto a polite nod for the service, waiting for Callisto to go back to her seat before speaking, “If that’s the how you want to take this metaphor, then I’d say that rather then showing up and coming face first to a delectable platter, we instead found an all-you-can-eat buffet with great quality and endless opportunities.

“Besides, Sylvie seems fine with it, she’s hardly blushing. I’ll admit it’s a bit of a shame because she hasn’t asked any awkward questions that would embarrass everyone further, but she seems fine. And, and, Kat has a girlfriend already. She’s not five. Kat’s basically an adult and if she can’t handle a bit of innuendo then I worry for her future. So really, I’m just doing her a favour!”

Bruce rolled his eyes and Sylvie decided to illuminate Roxy, “I’m perfectly aware of the biological realities of sex, as well as what terms are likely to be used for innuendos. While they do quite escape my notice at first, it is rather easy to pay attention to the way you all speak them. It is not hard to determine which words are innuendos just from that, and while they do not embarrass me, I could ask about them with intent to make things awkward if you want,”

Roxy stared at Sylvie for a few moments before turning to glare at Callisto, “What have you been teaching that girl?”

Callisto shrugged, “After Lily and Kat got the talk, Sylvie wondered what it was about. Vivian told me, ‘I want nothing to do with whatever nonsense this is going to turn into it’s your job’ so I gave Sylvie a brief biology lesson as well as some novels that speak on what feelings you experience as you go through puberty, and a few romance novels to top things off. She read through them pretty quickly, and not all of it was new information.”

*You know. I can’t say I’m surprised.*

[Neither am I. Not entirely pleased Callisto decided to educate Sylvie… but not surprised.]

*Eh… Sylvie would’ve just looked it all up in the library or maybe found a way to get her hands on some medical lecture recordings. It’s probably best she leant it all properly from Callisto then a bunch of random books that don’t explain the topic well.*

[I guess… but isn’t she a little young to be learning about this sort of stuff?]

*I can’t say. Callisto would have been very clinical with it all, and Sylvie hasn’t even touched on the edges of puberty so there’s no risk of her being overly awkward about it or of her misunderstanding something silly because of how her bodies changing. Instead it’s just information that might be useful in the future. Like taxes.*

[Do you need to worry about taxes?]

*I’m pretty sure D.E.M.O.N.S takes a cut from all the jobs I do already so I’m going to go with ‘no’. Then again… the fact remains that I’m earning money in another dimension… does that mean I’m committing tax evasion? Or is it tax fraud? Some other legally distinct version of tax issues? Because I am paying taxes… I think… just not to my government. Unless being a demon supersedes that? Which I guess it sort of does? The government probably wouldn’t agree, but D.E.M.O.N.S could probably force the issue.*

[I… I don’t know. I’m also not sure how I count either. We didn’t really test it but I’d be willing to be I can spend the Campfires, and Candles that you earn… or at the very least I’d guess I get a cut during your adventures. Does that mean I’m in the same position as you? My Mum will be so disappointed that her daughter is never planning to pay taxes.]

Roxy groaned at Callisto’s admission, “I really don’t know why you’d think that was a good idea,”

“Well I was not going to prevent her from learning, especially not after she came and asked me for the information. I would be a poor teacher if I simply said ‘it’s a grown-up thing’ or ‘it’s best you don’t know’. I did warn her that she would probably find most of it gross or irrelevant for now, but I certainly was not going to stop her,” intoned Callisto.

“You aren’t a teacher though!” retorted Roxy.

*Hmm… now that’s making me wonder if we’re technically illegal immigrants? I mean we do leave and renter the country pretty regularly without passports or anything.*

[Yes but we live here and have citizenship. If we suddenly turned up in say… Egypt, then perhaps you’d have a point. Then again… can you also get in trouble for sneaking OUT of a country? I’m not too sure on the laws surrounding that. It’s not something I’ve ever checked.]

Kat and Lily started to get lost in their own little world after that. Roxy’s teasing, while not overly embarrassing for Kat, was a bit much. Kat also didn’t like how easily she got caught up in Roxy’s pace, responding with things that were just as bad, if not worse, then her ‘grandmother’ was throwing out. Lily was awfully embarrassed and it just wasn’t the same as when Kat was politely teasing her and they were alone. Lily of course, had eyes only for Kat and as soon as the chance to get lost in their own conversation appeared, she jumped at it. Roxy and Callisto could argue if they wanted. It really wasn’t their problem.