That Day When Suzuki-kun Wasn't the Mob-B!

Team 8.

In the original timeline, this tracker squad consisted of Hinata Hyuga, Shino Aburame, and Kiba Inuzuka, all led by the newly promoted Jonin, Kurenai Yuhi. Yet, inexplicably, Kiba’s name had been completely erased from the roster, replaced by him, a civilian orphan, Suzuki Tanaka.

”Please take care of me, Suzuki-kun,” Shino said calmly, adjusting his dark glasses.

”Suzuki-kun... please take care of me,” Hinata added softly, a gentle, incredibly warm smile blooming on her face.

”Ah. Yes. Please take care of me, too, Shino. Hinata.”

Suzuki was genuinely surprised. While successfully infiltrating the tracking team was his absolute ideal outcome, he was still slightly dumbfounded that it had actually happened.

Was this a perk of being the Hokage’s new apprentice? Or did Hinata’s terrifying father physically threaten the administration staff into arranging this?

Whatever the reason, Suzuki was deeply relieved.

As for Kiba? He would be fine. There were plenty of other teams that could utilize a guy with a loud dog. Suzuki knew he was a massive upgrade over Kiba anyway, especially since Shino and Hinata already knew his working style and recognized how reliable he was in combat.

Suzuki might be a civilian, but the fact that he was Hiruzen’s official disciple instantly proved to the clan heirs that he possessed a terrifying level of talent. It was comforting for them to be partnered with a known, highly competent variable.

As for Team 7?

Suzuki absolutely wanted nothing to do with that chaotic dumpster fire of a squad. It was a team comprised entirely of walking liabilities. Sakura Haruno was essentially just a civilian filler. Naruto was a ticking time bomb holding a literal weapon of mass destruction in his gut. And Sasuke... was there really a need to explain the Uchiha? The boy was consumed entirely by a psychotic need for revenge.

The team’s leader, Kakashi Hatake, was equally problematic. While Kakashi was legendary, Suzuki knew the man was chronically exhausted, emotionally stunted, and terrible at actually teaching fundamental skills.

Then again, Suzuki couldn’t really judge. A Jonin squad leader wasn’t supposed to be a nanny. If Suzuki were somehow placed in charge of a Genin team, he wouldn’t teach them anything either. A ninja squad was just a group of heavily armed mercenaries assigned to complete contracts together. While ”friendship” and ”the Will of Fire” sounded nice on propaganda posters, they were ultimately just coworkers trying to secure a paycheck. It was much better to keep the relationship strictly professional.

Speaking of the leader of his team, Suzuki analyzed his new squad leader.

Kurenai Yuhi.

She was a beautiful, striking young woman. Her untamed black hair fell past her shoulders in heavy waves, framing her fair skin. She wore bright red lipstick that perfectly matched her most defining feature: her eyes. They were a brilliant, piercing red with an additional ring around the pupil, making them look eerily similar to the Sharingan.

She was essentially the textbook personification of a femme fatale, possessing a mature, dangerous charm completely distinct from the twelve-year-old girls in his class.

”Ouch! Ouch! Ouch!”

Suzuki flinched as a sharp pinch suddenly dug into his waist. He looked down to see Hinata standing suspiciously close, still maintaining her perfectly gentle smile.

”...You are much cuter, Hinata,” Suzuki whispered quickly, smoothly running damage control.

”R-Really?”

”Yes. You are far more beautiful.”

”...S-Stop praising me...” Hinata stammered, her face turning so incredibly red she looked like she was about to spontaneously combust.

”...”

Shino remained perfectly silent, simply pushing his glasses up his nose.

Kurenai, spotting her new team, didn’t waste any time. She wanted to quickly assess her new subordinates. ”Hinata Hyuga. Shino Aburame. Suzuki Tanaka. Please follow me.”

”Yes, Sensei,” the three replied in unison.

As they left the classroom, Suzuki offered a brief nod of farewell to the Ino-Shika-Cho trio. It was an absolute certainty that those three would be grouped together; their families held a generational monopoly on teamwork.

Ino practically glared daggers at Hinata’s retreating back.

”Don’t worry, Ino,” Shikamaru yawned, stretching his arms. ”Our new Jonin leader seems to have a very close, personal relationship with their team leader. We can easily arrange joint training exercises to keep an eye on him.”

”That’s perfect...” Ino grinned triumphantly. It was incredibly fortunate that she had a genius strategist managing her love life.

Crunch! Crunch! Crunch!

Choji had absolutely no idea what they were talking about. He was just hungry.

While Hinata, Suzuki, and Shino were perfectly calm, Kurenai was internally sweating bullets.

Shino was the direct heir to the Aburame Clan, a highly specialized, incredibly dangerous family of insect users.

Hinata was the literal princess of the Hyuga Clan, the absolute closest thing Konoha had to actual royalty.

And Suzuki?

Visually, Suzuki was the most normal. In Kurenai’s eyes, he was actually quite pleasing to look at. Instead of wearing absurd, flashy orange jumpsuits or highly impractical ninja gear, he wore a simple, sleek black turtleneck and dark trousers, with his forehead protector tied neatly around his arm. He looked less like a ninja and more like the wealthy, cold CEO from a romance novel.

But Kurenai knew exactly who he was. Despite looking like a civilian scholar, he was the brand-new, personally selected disciple of the Third Hokage.

...What on earth am I supposed to teach these three?! Kurenai panicked internally.

She led them to a quiet, sunlit training ground, taking a deep breath to compose herself. ”Alright. Let’s start by introducing ourselves one by one.”

”Yes, Team Leader,” Suzuki replied.

”Just call me Kurenai-san. ’Team Leader’ feels a bit too stiff for a three-man squad.”

”Understood, Kurenai-san.” Suzuki nodded. He immediately recognized that she wanted a more relaxed, familial dynamic. He could work with that.

”Good,” Kurenai smiled, leaning against a wooden training post. ”I’ll start. My name is Kurenai Yuhi. I am a newly promoted Jonin, highly skilled in Genjutsu. I like a good drink, and I dislike sweet cakes. My ultimate ambition is to become the absolute best Genjutsu user in Konoha.”

”.....”

Suzuki blinked. The best Genjutsu user? In a village that houses the Uchiha clan?

Yeah, let’s just keep my mouth shut, Suzuki decided.

”I will go next,” Shino said, adjusting his glasses. ”My name is Aburame Shino. My hobbies include entomology and collecting rare specimens for my hive. I enjoy wild grass salad and winter melon, and I strongly dislike foods with pungent odors. As for my ambition... I wish to fight a strong opponent.”

Shino slowly turned his head, his dark glasses locking directly onto Suzuki.

”....”

Kurenai raised an eyebrow. Suzuki just sighed.

”Do you want to spar with me, Shino?” Suzuki asked casually.

”Yes.”

”Alright, we can clock in a session later,” Suzuki agreed, turning back to Kurenai. ”Actually, Kurenai-san, it might be more efficient if we bypass the talking and just demonstrate our capabilities right now. Do you mind?”

”I don’t mind at all.”

Kurenai actually preferred that. She was desperate to see exactly what her terrifyingly prestigious squad was capable of so she could create a possible training.

”Hinata, would you mind going first?” Suzuki asked smoothly.

”Yes,” Hinata nodded obediently. She stepped forward, her pale eyes focused. ”My name is Hinata Hyuga. I like zenzai and cinnamon rolls. I dislike crab and shrimp. As for my ambition... I just want to become strong enough to properly support a certain someone.”

”A certain someone?” Kurenai narrowed her striking red eyes, glancing thoughtfully at Suzuki. ”You’re quite a lucky boy.”

”....”

Suzuki violently rolled his eyes. ”Right. My turn. My name is Suzuki Tanaka. I like black coffee, and I don’t really have any specific weaknesses. As for my ambition... that is secret.”

”...”

The three of them stared at him blankly.

Suzuki offered a perfectly polite, entirely ruthless smile. ”Anyway, Kurenai-san. You said you didn’t mind starting the spar right now?”

Before Kurenai could even blink, Suzuki’s hands blurred into a rapid, impossible sequence of seals.

Hinata, highly familiar with his tactics, instantly squeezed her eyes shut and turned her head away.

Shino flinched as a tiny, perfectly aimed pebble suddenly struck the bridge of his sunglasses, violently knocking them off his face.

And then—

”Fire Release: Flashbang.”

A blinding sphere of pure white light violently detonated in the center of the training ground, completely blinding the Jonin and the Aburame heir.