Cultivation Chat Group

If I was really the one to pluck her green onion shoot off, why didn’t I eat it but put it in my pocket instead after wrapping it up?

Does it mean that I carelessly plucked it off when I was on the mysterious island, and I kept it because I wanted to glue it back together after leaving the island?

”My upper part! My shoot! My green onion sprout!” On the enlightenment stone, Lady Onion started to shout. ”Sh*tty Shuhang, it was really you who plucked off my green onion shoot!”

”Calm down and don’t shout! I don’t remember what happened on the mysterious island either.” Song Shuhang attentively looked at the severed piece of green onion shoot and said, ”Lady Onion, if I were to glue this part back, would you restore to your previous status?”

”How can you glue it back? And with what, glue?! I should cut your head off and then try to glue it back with some glue!” Lady Onion bellowed. It took her a lot of time to grow that green onion shoot, and now, someone had casually plucked it off! She was extremely hurt at this time. If Song Shuhang weren’t to properly apologize, she wouldn’t forgive him!

”You have a point.” Song Shuhang again wrapped the green onion shoot in the paper and placed it in the rabbit-shaped size-reducing purse.

Since it wasn’t possible to glue it back, it was better to put it somewhere safe.

Now that it was plucked off, throwing it away would be a waste. Perhaps he could find some use for it—for example, if he needed to accumulate qi and blood quickly while trying to jump through the dragon gate, he could eat this green onion shoot (after processing it of course) and obtain quite good results.

After storing away the green onion shoot, Song Shuhang said to Lady Onion, ”If it was really me who plucked your green onion shoot off, I’ll try to find a way to compensate you!”

”How are you planning to compensate me?” The remaining half of Lady Onion’s body swelled lightly. She was pouting!

”I don’t know yet, but I’ll do it if there is an opportunity. Moreover, even if I wanted to, I can’t really compensate you in your current state. If you want, I can give you back your onion sprout and you can play with it?” Song Shuhang said.

”Not even a little bit of sincerity!” Lady Onion said somewhat depressed, but her swelling body deflated a bit—this foolish green onion was unexpectedly quite reasonable.

”Don’t worry. I keep my word. If I said that I would compensate you, I’ll make sure to do it,” Song Shuhang said earnestly.

Lady Onion had been cultivating buddhist techniques, but it seemed that her compatibility with these techniques wasn’t high. After practicing for 300 years, she was still stuck in the First Stage Realm.

Therefore, should he try to give her another set of techniques? Since buddhist techniques weren’t good, maybe he should give her daoist or scholarly ones!

After thinking this much, Song Shuhang quietly made a mental note regarding that option.

Afterward, he took the enlightenment stone and sat cross-legged in meditation, trying to strengthen his mental energy.

❄️❄️❄️

Some time later, just when Song Shuhang finished his meditation, Immortal Master Copper Trigram also returned with several wild animals in his hands.

As for Venerable White, he was still waiting for Wolf One and the others and had yet to come back.

Immortal Master Copper Trigram quickly lit a fire outside the tent. Then, he took a barbecue grill from his handcart and started to skin the wild animals.

After adding some condiments, he started to grill the meat. It seemed that Immortal Master Copper Trigram’s survival skills were top-notch—when he was young and weak, he would be often chased down after making sh*tty divinations. The number of times he had to hide in remote mountains, forests, or in the sea to escape his pursuers was very high. At the time, he was too young and hadn’t reached the realm where he could survive without eating. Therefore, he had to apply himself to find a way to survive in the wilderness.

Immortal Master Copper Trigram said happily, ”Come, have a taste of my cooking. I haven’t done this in a while; I feel a bit out of practice.”

Doudou squatted on a side and swallowed a mouthful of saliva.

The small monk Guoguo hid in the tent, not daring to come out. He was afraid that he would break his religious commandment if he were to get closer to the food.

”I’ll go call Senior White and tell him that the meal is ready,” Song Shuhang said.

Wolf One and the others hadn’t arrived yet. Therefore, it was useless for Venerable White to continuously stay at the seashore and wait. It was better to call him out so that he could eat something.

”Sure,” Immortal Master Copper Trigram said with a faint smile, giving Song Shuhang a meaningful glance… earlier, when he was hunting, he took several pictures and decided to send them to the Nine Provinces Number One Group to show off a bit.

But as soon as he opened the group chat, he received a myriad of notifications and his phone almost froze.

After his phone slowly recovered and he was deciding which pictures to send, he got another 99 notifications. The group chat was being flooded like crazy.

Moreover, it was a flood of pictures… since the signal on the island wasn’t too good, all the pictures were still buffering and had yet to load.

What happened to the fellow daoists in the group chat? Why are they flooding like crazy?

What kind of marvelous topic of conversation did they find?

Slowly, after the pictures finished loading, Immortal Master Copper Trigram was shocked!

What did I just see?

An adorable twin-tails edition Senior White…?

A ponytail edition Senior White?

Pigtails coiled up on the top of the head edition Senior White?

There were all kinds of Senior White’s pictures.

Moreover, they were everywhere!

Even the profile pictures of the people flooding the group had changed into pictures of Senior White. The whole group chat had gone crazy.

Immortal Master Copper Trigram stared blankly for some time… just what had happened today?

Was this really the same Nine Provinces Number One Group he knew? He had been offline only for a while, and yet, he felt as though he had been left behind by the times...

Let’s see how this ’Senior White flood’ started...

Immortal Master Copper Trigram switched the phone to another mode and opened the chat logs, starting to scroll upwards.

Fearful, the people in the group had sent over 60,000 messages while crazily flooding. Cultivators were really quick with their hands; it wasn’t something that the average man could do.

After a long time, he finally found the source of everything—soon after he lent his mobile phone to little friend Song Shuhang, Soft Feather shared a file named [Senior White’s expression package] in the group space.

This file was precisely the reason of this frenzied flood in the Nine Provinces Number One Group.

After a short delay, Immortal Master Copper Trigram made up his mind and decided to download the file. Although the speed of the Internet connection was awful, he managed to successfully download the file after quite some time.

To keep up with the times, Immortal Master Copper Trigram didn’t hesitate and changed his profile picture to :senior_white_look_down:. He found this emote very cool!

Now that he had changed his profile picture, he was planning to have a good chat with Northern River’s Loose Cultivator. At the time, he would be able to look down on him continuously. What a marvelous feeling!

Immediately after, he started to scroll downwards… and very soon, he found a very interesting conversation.

It was a conversation between True Monarch Yellow Mountain and Soft Feather.

True Monarch Yellow Mountain: ”But whose hands are those? They should belong to the person messing with Senior White’s hair, right?”

”Those are Senior Song’s hands,” Soft Feather replied.

If I’m not mistaken… Venerable White was also added to the Nine Provinces Number One Group, right? Moreover, it was precisely little friend Song Shuhang who helped him create the account and got him into the group.

In this case, Venerable White should have also seen the chat logs, right?

Yeah, there is no doubt about it… with how much the people in the group are flooding, Venerable White just has to go online and open the instant messaging app to see everything!

”It’s good to be young!” Immortal Master Copper Trigram muttered.

I should give a ’like’ to Soft Feather… and light a candle for little friend Song Shuhang while I’m at it!

❄️❄️❄️

Song Shuhang had no idea that Soft Feather had uploaded the ’Senior White’s expression package’ in the group space—his brain hadn’t even contemplated the possibility that the file Soft Feather wanted to send him was the fearful ’Senior White’s expression package’.

If he were aware of it, he would have already dug a hole somewhere on the small island and buried himself there.

Sometimes, ignorance was bliss.

Song Shuhang went in Senior White’s direction, his state of mind very good.

At this time, Venerable White was sitting cross-legged on a huge rock. He was resting his chin in one hand while using the other to fiddle with the phone. His face was extremely calm, with the long black hair hanging behind his back slightly fluttering in the sea breeze. This scene was truly magnificent, just like a superb painting.

”Senior White, it’s getting late. Since that Wolf One isn’t here yet, how about eating something?” Song Shuhang shouted in Venerable White’s direction from afar.

Venerable White had long reached the realm where he didn’t need to eat to survive. But since the day he had come out of secluded meditation, he was acting like a normal modern man. Working, resting, and eating three meals per day.

”Hmm?” After hearing Song Shuhang’s voice, Venerable White turned his head around and said with a faint smile, ”Is it dinner time already?”

”Yes, Senior Copper Trigram went hunting and already started to prepare food. It looks very tasty, and the smell is also very good,” Song Shuhang replied with a smile.

Venerable White silently nodded. ”I’ve heard before about fellow daoist Copper Trigram’s cooking skills in the group. If we’re talking about taste only, his skills are almost comparable to immortal chefs. Let’s give it a try.”

After saying this much, Venerable White put his phone away and jumped down from the rock, landing beside Song Shuhang.

The duo walked side by side, heading toward the tent.

As they were walking, Venerable White casually asked, ”Shuhang, would you find it amusing if I were to change my hairstyle?”

”Eh?” Song Shuhang turned his head around and looked at Venerable White, somewhat confused.

...It was time to explain how terrific the effects of the memory loss from the mysterious island were. Song Shuhang’s mind was currently in a mess; the memory sealing technique had worsened his reaction time by quite a lot.

In normal circumstances, after hearing the keywords ’Venerable White’, ’hairstyle’, and ’amusing’... the search engine of his brain would immediately get into action, making him immediately remember about that death-seeking matter that he and Soft Feather performed not too long ago.

Unfortunately, the ’search engine’ was still unavailable due to the memory seal. Therefore, he stared blankly, not understanding what was happening.

Seeing Song Shuhang’s confused expression, the corner of Venerable White mouth rose as he faintly smiled, not saying anything else.

”Change hairstyle?” Song Shuhang asked in puzzlement.

The duo continued to walk side by side.

After walking for a few more steps, Venerable White stretched his hands out and grabbed his long hair, lifting his hands up. ”For example... a hairstyle like this?”

Song Shuhang turned his head around and looked at Senior White— Ah? This hairstyle… wait, isn’t this twin-tails edition Venerable White?

Song Shuhang stiffened!

Song Shuhang was shocked!

Song Shuhang opened his mouth wide!

Even if his brain was in a mess, after seeing this picture, he immediately recalled that death-seeking matter he and Soft Feather performed some time ago.

Why did Venerable White suddenly bring this hairstyle up?

Was it because his mood was extremely good and he thus decided to change his hairstyle? Or perhaps he discovered what Soft Feather and I did at the time?

Impossible! That was a top-secret matter! Aside from Soft Feather and me, no one knows about it, unless… Soft Feather leaked this information?

Wait… ’unless Soft Feather leaked this information’?

Song Shuhang immediately recalled the conversation he had with Soft Feather when he borrowed Copper Trigram’s phone earlier… soon after, he felt his scalp go numb. He had thought of a fearful possibility!

Song Shuhang tried to swallow a mouthful of saliva, but his mouth was as dry as before. At this time, he couldn’t utter a single word.

”Hehe.” Venerable White put his hair down and laughed.

Venerable White’s face was calm and his steps steady as he lightly moved forward.

Song Shuhang’s face was stiff as he moved forward with heavy steps, staggering.

Then, he stumbled on a small stone and fell to the ground. He was caught off guard, and he felt a bit of pain.

Et tu, Soft Feather…?!

This isn’t good. I must ask Senior Copper Trigram to lend me his phone again. I need to check the contents of the file Soft Feather sent in the group space.

Moreover, I have to contact Senior Seven and tell him that I’ve obtained the skeletal dragon’s withered vine necessary to cure Sixteen.

❄️❄️❄️

Immortal Master Copper Trigram’s cooking skills were really excellent, and the food tasted really good. Although he was eating, Song Shuhang couldn’t feel any flavor at this time.

He just wanted to fill his belly a bit and ask Immortal Master Copper Trigram to lend him his phone. He had to check the content of the file Soft Feather sent in the group.

But just as he was about to ask, Immortal Master Copper Trigram wiped his mouth and said with a radiant smile, ”Little friend Song Shuhang, Senior White, little Guoguo, and Doudou, rest well after you’re doing eating. I still have a matter to take care of, and I need to take my leave. See you soon.”

After finishing his sentence, he lightly jumped and a flying sword appeared beneath his feet, allowing him to soar into the sky—he had built the altar quite some time ago.

Now, the time was right, geographical and human conditions were also favorable. It was just about time to go and activate the altar.

Song Shuhang opened his mouth… but his body stiffened, no words came out.

”The sky is getting dark, we should rest. Shuhang, you should move Miss Chu Chu to a tent and the small monk and Doudou to another,” Venerable White said with a faint smile and elegantly put the tableware away.

The sky… was getting dark.

It is indeed time to rest in peace.

Wait. It is time to rest, only rest, right...?