Omni-Anime: I Stand at the Forefront of Popularity

Chapter 167: Chapter 168: Jiraiya—Why Do I Keep Getting Chills Down My Spine?

”That’s good, that’s good~!”

After watching Naruto transform into Naruko and then run through every jutsu and chakra-walking technique Naruto had, Jiraiya had a pretty solid read on Naruto’s level.

Capable of using the Rasengan. Excellent sensory ability. Solid chakra control. And according to Kakashi, she had on-and-off access to the Adamantine Sealing Chains.

—Of course, in reality it was Kushina who could use the Adamantine Sealing Chains, not Naruto. But no one else knew that.

”Solid foundation.”

More than solid—exceptionally so. As if someone had built that foundation for him specifically.

”Hyuga Hanabi—a more capable teacher than Kakashi, apparently.”

[Hahaha, I knew it]

[Hanabi: Lmao, this household falls apart without me]

[That old line, remixed]

[Pretty funny honestly]

[But what I’m more concerned about is that Naruto’s mom has to be losing her mind right now]

[Having to watch her own kid selling himself—rough]

[I can’t breathe I’m laughing too hard]

”Ugh——!”

Jiraiya shuddered for no apparent reason.

An inexplicable chill had crept up his spine.

He looked around, but couldn’t pinpoint where this dangerous, hostile feeling was coming from.

”A trick of the mind?”

Jiraiya decided it must be imagination, but couldn’t shake a nagging guilt.

”Greetings, Jiraiya-sama.”

Another voice reached him from nearby. A clear, pleasant, girlish voice.

”Oh oh oh!”

A cute girl?!

”Ugh——”

She was, admittedly, fairly cute.

But bundled up extraordinarily thoroughly, wasn’t she?

The newcomer was Hanabi.

Dressed in a thick, full-coverage kimono. Hands folded in front of her, one Puppet Arm holding a parasol, the other carrying a bundle.

She wore a mask on her face. From head to toe, only her hands and a small stretch of her neck were visible.

She had the elegance of a traditional yamato nadeshiko—quiet, refined. Not quite in Jiraiya’s strike zone.

Still, she really was pretty.

”Hmm—wait.”

At that moment, Jiraiya noticed something. Around Hanabi’s neck looked like a rope loop.

And it wasn’t just that—the hands she was holding folded in front of her were wound with red rope. Both hands tied together. And her legs were the same.

The only reason she could move without difficulty was that Puppet Arm beside her.

Jiraiya frowned. How had she approached without making a sound in that state?

”Please don’t mind my condition, Jiraiya-sama—it’s only training.” Hanabi smiled and said.

”Ah... ah... right.” Jiraiya was a little lost.

Kids these days are wild. Or maybe I’m just too perverted, and everything looks off-color to me.

Jiraiya was spiraling into confusion.

”You... that... Hyuga Hanabi?”

At last, Jiraiya snapped back.

This person was supposedly the legendary Hyuga Hanabi.

”Ah, Hanabi!”

Naruto noticed Hanabi too, and hurried over.

”Hanabi, Hanabi—I found this Pervy Sage myself to help me train! He’s actually pretty strong!” Naruto said.

”It’s the Mount Myōboku Toad Sage!” Jiraiya corrected again.

”How come you’re ’Naruko’ again?” Hanabi asked.

”Naruko? What Naruko?” Naruto tilted her head.

”That’s what I’m calling you when you look like a girl—Naruko. To tell you apart.”

It was just changing the to to ko, making it a girl’s name.

Though in truth, Hanabi figured that even if Naruto had been born a girl, her name would still have been Naruto. Setting aside what the to ending actually signified—in the ”original story,” Kushina had been telling Mikoto Uchiha about the chosen name before Naruto was even born. So whether male or female, per canon, this child’s name would almost certainly have been Naruto regardless.

But right now, since they had both Naruto and Naruko to deal with, the separate nickname was more practical.

”Did you come to see me!” Naruto asked.

”Mm—brought you a training outfit. Try it on.”

”Nice!”

The original outfit had been modified by Hanabi. Mainly she’d swapped some of the patterns for Hidden Leaf Village markings and Uzumaki Clan crests, then redesigned a few other areas.

First came the full-body mesh undersuit—actually a ”mini chainmail” woven from metal thread. Over that went the outer layer.

”It’s really comfortable to move in!”

Naruto tested the mobility. Felt great.

”Oh oh oh oh! Amazing! Super amazing!”

Even Jiraiya lit up, one thumb raised, the other hand pressed to a bleeding nose.

For some reason, even in his excitement, he kept being hit by bursts of a dark, vicious killing intent—as if someone somewhere wanted him dead.

”Naruto—drop the transformation.”

”Sure!”

Naruto canceled the transformation.

The outfit had good elasticity, so after Naruto reverted, the clothes simply returned to the proportions of a normal ninja suit.

”No no no!” Jiraiya let out a wail.

Though it wasn’t actually all that bad—when Naruto became male again, the fitted suit scaled accordingly.

[Kind of cool, actually]

[Add a red scarf and it’s complete]

[Hold on, you’re referencing Greninja]

[Ugh—ever since Ash made it to the top, Pokémon’s gone downhill. No more long-running series. Rough]

[Honestly, Nintend-hell’s Sun & Moon was always a pain to deal with]

[Game Freak has been a disaster. And so was the anime]

Uh oh.

Hanabi hadn’t been thinking of Greninja when she designed the outfit—but now that the idea had surfaced, she really did want to get Naruto a red scarf.

”What’s wrong?” Naruto checked the mobility. Still felt good.

”Nothing~—just thinking a red scarf would suit you.”

Hanabi tilted her head up.

”Huh?” Jiraiya found that odd. She couldn’t see—could she?

”It’s summer! That would be boiling!” Naruto shook his head.

[Ugh]

[That’s my wife, thinking exactly what I was thinking]

[What a shame]

[Such a waste]

[Though the outfit really is something—works male, works female. Guy version looks sharp, girl version looks pretty damn racy]

[You’re going to tell me Hanabi didn’t plan that, and I will not believe you]

[Male-female compatible—that took real thought to design]

The audience’s attention had shifted entirely to Naruto—or Naruko.

The attention boost from the outfit was already padding Hanabi’s Popularity Points.

Hanabi tilted her head—could dressing the main cast in her own Performance Outfits be a viable method for grinding Popularity Points?

Interesting.

”Normally you can wear it under your jacket. When you’re training, take the jacket off. It’ll help sharpen your grasp of jutsu, which speeds up training in turn.”

The explanation was made up, but it had to exist—otherwise there’d be no accounting for why Naruto’s training pace had suddenly accelerated.

”Naruto, Naruto.” Jiraiya waggled his eyebrows at him. ”Transform into Naruko again, would you!”

He’d been drawn in by a Naruko with nothing on—but a clothed version, he had to admit, was also not bad.

But for some reason, the moment he finished saying that, Jiraiya felt another wave of cold dread crawling up his back.

—Could someone actually be cursing him right now?