Help! Five Beast Alphas Want To Breed Me!!(BL)

Koda;

He sighs and looks away again. Then, finally, he speaks.

”You’re reading too much into this.” He says dismissively, and I tilt my head as I watch him.

”No, I’m not.” I say, and he turns back to me.

Those dual colored eyes shine with a stubbornness that tells me he will not admit it, but I feel he needs to know that he’s seen.

”You’re not leaving because of that letter.” I then add, deciding to hit the nail on the head, and his eyes narrow defiantly.

”Really?” He questions defensively, and I nod.

”Okay. Why am I leaving, then?” he asks, and I stare at him.

There it is.

Not curiosity.... But a challenge.

Another one I will not back away from.

”You’re leaving because you think you don’t belong here anymore,” I answer, and silence falls between us. Heavier this time.

His expression doesn’t crack, but I see it anyway. The slight tightening. The way his gaze shifts, just for a second.

I hit it.

He exhales softly, then smiles as he lifts his face to the sky.

”You always think too highly of yourself,” he says, and I blink at him.

”You always assume you understand everything.” He adds, and I smile.

”I don’t need to understand everything. Just the people important to me. And they happen to be everything to me.” I reply, and that wipes the smile from his face as he looks back at me.

However, I don’t give him the chance to reply.

”You see Elian. You see me, you see Zephan... and you decide your place is already taken.” I speak, and this time, he doesn’t interrupt.

So I keep going.

”You think because you are not the one who marked him, that you have already lost something that you honestly always had,” I add, and his jaw tightens.

”You’re wrong,” I say, and that gets a reaction from him.

Small, but a reaction nonetheless.

”You don’t see him properly,” I whisper as I reach out to hold his shoulder, and once again, he looks back at me.

”Don’t you see the way he looks at you? The way he asked you not to stay away for long? He needs you too.” I whisper, and Zethar looks away.

That lands deeper. I can feel it.

For a moment, neither of us speaks. Then he laughs.

Soft... but equally heavy.

”You honestly don’t get it, Koda,” he says, and I blink at him.

”You make it sound as if everything falls into place just because you want it to.” He adds, as he looks at me, and I shrug.

”It doesn’t... But running doesn’t fix it either.” I reply, and his expression shifts again, with something colder and more stubborn settling into his expression.

”I’m not running.” He snaps, and I sigh.

”You are.”

This time, he doesn’t argue.

He just looks forward again.

”I have a role, and it’s just not here right now.” He says after a moment, and I fall silent.

”You think your time... to be there for him... comes later?” I can’t help but ask, and he nods. Still not looking at me.

”Yes.”

”And you are willing to leave everything now because of that?”

”I am willing to not stand where I am not needed.” He replies, and I fall silent as I watch him.

He turns back to smile at me, but I know it’s just a mask.

”He has you, and Zephan, and Aunt Selthía, and Zerana... he has an entire empire at his beck and call. I don’t fit into that. I could stay embedded in his shadow... follow him around for... forever, and... I’ll still be the last person he’ll need, or call out to.” He replies solemnly, and I blink at him.

I exhale slowly and pull my hand away cautiously.

There’s... there’s nothing left to argue.

He made his decision before I even came looking for him.

And nothing I say will change it. I should just... be here for him.

I reach over and grab his hair, roughly enough to make him flinch, and he glares at me.

”Idiot,” I mutter as I ruffle the black, silky curtain he calls hair, and he lets out a quiet huff, but doesn’t pull away.

I yank him into a brief, firm embrace, and he clings to me.

I know it’s because he’s afraid of falling off... but it’s still something.

”We’ll take care of him. I promise,” I say.

He doesn’t respond immediately, but I feel him relax, just a little.

”I know,” he whispers, and I smile at him.

When I pull back, he reaches into his pocket and brings something out.

A silver dagger.

Sleek, regal, and carefully crafted.

”For the baby,” he says, placing it in my hand, and I pause.

”It’s my first gift to her.” He adds, and I stare at it, then at him.

”You’re... serious?” I ask in awe, and emotions I cannot name, and he grins proudly.

”Very.” He replies, and I almost laugh.

”You’re planning to train her in combat, aren’t you?” I demand, and his smile grows even brighter.

”Of course. She will have an entire empire to look after her, but true confidence comes from one’s ability to protect themselves.” He replies, and I smile.

I shake my head, but take the dagger anyway.

”Thank you,” I whisper, and he nods proudly before turning back to the sky. I follow suit.

We don’t say anything after that.

There isn’t anything left to say.

We just sit there, side by side, with the wind moving around us, and the sky proudly twinkling.

For a moment, it feels like nothing is changing.

Like he isn’t about to leave. Like we are both just brothers under the same roof again.

I really missed him. I was looking forward to taking care of Elián and my baby with him and Zephan.

But I know better.

Zethar has already left... and the worst part is... I don’t think Elián has any idea this is how Zethar feels.

Is there a way to fix this?

I know Zethar... when he turns away from something like this, it’s like he’s locking himself up in a cocoon to protect himself... permanently.