Myths Reawakened

Under a dome of darkness, blinding red lighting crackled amid scorching waves of heat. Every part of the air carried infinite sin. Beneath looming dark clouds, an island hovered above all inhabitants of Hell. It was all scorched land and swirling black smoke. Now and then, lightning would strike and singe the earth.

The island was empty save for a weathered, almost toppling long table and seven wooden chairs beyond repair, the wear and tear showing the beauty of frugality.

This was the council of the demon lords. The furniture was shared goods and was thus left unrepaired. The shabby state made sense. No one expected demons in Hell to possess the generosity to pay for maintenance out of their own pockets.

In Hell, there were a total of seventy-two demons qualified to attend the meeting, but only seven were entitled to take the seats. The other sixty-five were welcome to sit, too—on the vast, empty land on the island.

Piss off if you’re dissatisfied. Complain, and you’ll be beaten to death!

Even so, the sixty-five demon lords hadn’t attended the council meeting for a long time, not even from the clearing. Hell belonged to the Seven Demon Lords. They would just be fighting the Seven Demon Lords’ fight and creating hellish jokes for the Seven Demon Lords.

Rumble!

Red lightning struck the island, but froze like a screen suspended in the air. The Lord of Envy parted the red curtains. He had come fifteen minutes late so that he would have the satisfaction of showing up last.

But all seven chairs were empty.

(ꐦ￣皿￣)ง

“Damn vermin, late to a council meeting of the demon lords? How could Hell be properly developed with demons like you?”

“You deserve to be sealed by the angels!”

Envy breathed out hot air. Since there was no one around, he gleefully took the main seat at the long table—it belonged to Pride.

Rubbing his backside against the chair to scent it, he then rose to his feet reluctantly and took the secondary seat. Clearly, he had been punished for claiming Pride’s seat before.

Not long after, a slim figure took form in the air and slowly sat down on a chair. He looked like a male human dressed in a simple grey robe. His gentlemanly, handsome features were top tier. Just like Envy, he showed peak male beauty.

Unlike Envy’s cynical rage, though, he slumped on the table as soon as he sat down with hooded, unfocused eyes, his head drooping. It seemed that he had no stake in the world.

It was the Lord of Sloth!

He scratched his head. All of a sudden, his pupils dilated, and his breathing stopped. He appeared dead in every sense of the world.

Envy glanced at him and huffed pridefully. He knew Sloth was too lazy to talk to him, so he didn’t try to start a conversation.

“Pfft!”

“...”

“Hehehe—”

The ‘body’ shook, its shoulders trembling. Sloth was alive again.

“...”

Envy’s eyes twitched. Slamming the table, he shot to his feet and roared, “I’m not tolerating more from you, you couch demon! Duel me!”

“You misunderstood, Envy.” Sloth lazily lay on the table. “I wasn’t laughing at you. I just remembered something fun.”

He didn’t even laugh that long, putting no effort into his jeer.

“What thing? Spell it out!”

“The thing about Hesione losing purity. You talked about that right here last time... or is it the time before the last time?”

“Damn it, that’s ages ago!”

“I was too lazy to laugh then, but it was really funny and deserved to be laughed at. Or it would be disrespectful to you...”

“...”

A vein pulsed on Envy’s forehead. The Seven Deadly Sins were connected. Sloth was only citing laziness as an excuse to laugh at Envy again—Sloth had laughed during the meeting before the previous meeting!

He wasn’t lazy at all. He was very eager when there were hellish jokes to enjoy.

“What’s going on? Why aren’t the others here? This is taking me away from my business.”

The Lord of Greed entered and took a seat, slamming an hourglass on the table. He fidgeted anxiously as soon as he sat down.

Once all the sand had fallen, he would get up and leave no matter how important today’s meeting was.

Unlike the cynical Envy and the unkempt Sloth, Greed wasn’t handsome, or it would be more accurate to say that his handsomeness was tempered by above-average weight and a shrewd, practical look.

What good was a pretty face going to do? Only those with money could find a lifelong partner in each other. Those without money would only be watching on the sidelines.

Two figures entered at the same time immediately after. One had a cold, vicious look on his face, and the other had a vicious, cold look on his face. After taking their seats, they continued to glare at each other.

It was the Lord of Gluttony and the Lord of Wrath. The two great demon lords were currently at war, both trying to become the one and only demon god of Hell. After gaining the information of Mechanical Augmentation, they had been studying it night and day in their territories.

While studying, they applied the knowledge to transform their familiars into mechanical creatures. Then they reverse-engineered the creatures to build a great number of soldier factories, collecting practical data for better research.

Then, they saw one another’s factories.

They realized that they didn’t have exclusive ownership over Mechanical Augmentation, that the bastard next door had acquired it too. To prevent lagging behind, they waged war against each other at the same time and invaded each other’s territory.

Unaffected by Mechanical Augmentation, Wayne had been living his life as usual, bed-surfing and sticking to his routine. Wrath and Gluttony, on the other hand, acquired the coldness of machines and the volatility of gunpowder, their temper growing hotter. If the council meeting wasn’t so important, and if Envy hadn’t organized it, ensuring that they would get to witness the latest hellish joke if nothing else, they would’ve started fighting then and there.

Only one person could reach the peak of an evolution path, while all others would fall under its control like slaves. It was impossible for them to coexist in peace.

The fact that they had stayed put for so long showed the value of jokes in Hell.

Five minutes later, an elegant fragrance announced the arrival of a tall, slim, and graceful figure. She looked like a human female with flowy blonde hair. The red evening gown hugged her alluring figure. Every curve seemed carefully crafted to seduce.

The Lord of Lust!

Lust was the mother of succubi with a charm that transcended physical bodies. She was deadly attractive to all living beings. With an insidious darkness and dangerous allure, every part of her exuded an irresistible pull.

Her face and body were breathtakingly perfect and could drive people to madness. Even if she just stood there and did nothing, she could arouse the deepest desires.

Wayne had been calling Hestia Lust incarnate, but it wasn’t entirely right. In appearance alone, Hestia did meet the criteria, making onlookers want to have her. However, Lust herself was a walking bottle of poison that attracted people to her like moths slamming into lights. They couldn’t help but want to tame her beautiful body.

ε=(´ο`*)))

Lust pulled a chair, her head drooping as she tiredly lit a cigarette. The unfocused look in her eyes resembled that of Sloth. The difference was that Sloth was lazy, while she was exhausted. It was as if all her thoughts had been drained.

How could a succubus lose to a tentacle monster? Lust refused to admit defeat. She had met the most powerful opponent in her life and planned to go harder once she returned!

She believed that she would win. As long as she pulled harder, her opponent would surely lower his head for her and become her pet, succumbing to the poison of Lust.

Even when exhausted, she was beautiful. Were she anywhere but at this meeting, there would be many rushing to light her cigarette by igniting themselves. She never had to do it herself.

This was a council meeting of demon lords, though, and none of the great demon lords were susceptible to her charm. Or it was more accurate to say that they possessed greater desires that prevented them from being blinded by Lust.

(눈_눈)

Son of a beach, Hell is beyond redemption! Envy cursed.

Sloth was slothing, Gluttony and Wrath were locked in a staring contest, Greed was trying to give a sales pitch, and Lust was smoking and conserving energy.

Envy stared unblinkingly at the empty chair, furious that Pride hadn’t shown up.

Following a play of light and shadows, the Lord of Pride materialized on the seat. All demon lords looked humanoid with excellent looks. None of them were ugly.

Pride appeared as a human male in his thirties with an unusual dignity. His black hair was slicked back. Wearing a white shirt, he had casually draped his black suit jacket on the chair.

Propping his chin with one hand, he tapped the table with the other, looking at the six useless demons with an impassive expression.

How dull. He wanted to go to the human word!

“Why are you so late, Pride? You always show up last. I knew it...” Envy’s eyes lit up. Slamming the table and standing up, he pointed an accusing finger at him. “This isn’t pride. You always arrive first but hide until everyone else has arrived. You’re worried that you’ll embarrass yourself by arriving early!”

Pride didn’t say anything, ignoring Envy.

Envy raged, rolling up the long sleeves of his robe for a fight.

The six demon lords turned to Envy at the same time. Even Sloth became wide awake.

Today, though, Envy chose not to start a fight. He had uncharacteristically calmed himself down. With a scoff, he said, “I called you here today for something important.”

He paused.

“...” x6

Damn it, say something! Any of you!

“What do you want to say, Envy?” Pride asked coolly.

Not you! You make it sound like I’m your subordinate, and I’m reporting to you.

Envy huffed from his nose, then snarked, “I received information from a reliable source that there is a traitor among the Seven Demon Lords. They’re a spy from Heaven who entered Hell as a sleeper agent.”

He paused again.

Pride glanced at Envy. “Continue.”

Damn it, stop responding to me!

Envy became even more irritated. He pointed at Pride and said, “You, Pride, are the undercover agent from Heaven. You’re an angel!”

“...” x5

He’s at it again! x5

The five demon lords shook their heads at the same time.

“Envy, if you’re just going to be a clown and make us laugh today,” Greed complained, “I have to say that the joke isn’t funny at all.”

“Yeah, try another,” Sloth drawled. “The joke about Hesione losing purity is nice.”

“Hahahaha—” x5

Envy’s face darkened. He insisted on framing Pride. “My information comes from a reliable source. The most powerful living weapon of Heaven said so. He tainted Hesione’s purity...”

“Pfft!”

“He said it! He really said it!”

“Ahahaha—” x6

The demon lords slammed the table and the chairs, all of them doubling over with laughter. Among them, Pride was laughing the hardest. Slamming the table, he laughed so hard that he burst into tears.

(는皿는)

Furious, Envy flipped the long table and kicked Pride in the face. Then he knocked down all the other demon lords with a flurry of punches.

୧(╬▔皿▔)┌┛#)`з゜)

(Ծε(#O==(▔皿▔)ว

(ง╬▔皿▔)==O))#)3≖)

In the end, the six demon lords piled up like a human pyramid, while Envy stood on top of them and howled at the sky. All his anger was drained, and his mind was clear again...

...That was the end of his daydream!