One Person: I, the Dragon Tiger Stall King! I Won!

1: When I woke up, the rags became my life-saving strawA new book voyage, a magically modified fanfiction, please store your brain! To avoid subverting your worldview! Readers who like it are welcome to follow and add it to their bookshelf!

…Mount Longhu, Tianshi Mansion, early morning.

The first ray of dawn tore through the thin mist, and before it could illuminate the secluded woodshed, Zhang Xuanyi yawned and sat up from a pile of dry straw.

The faded Daoist robe he wore was covered in ashes from last night’s roasted sweet potatoes, making him look less like a reclusive Daoist and more like a cook by the stove.

He was originally the Tianshi Mansion’s most notorious slacker in a hundred years, kicked by his master from the bustling main hall to this back mountain, ostensibly to ”temper his character.”

His daily work consisted of chopping wood, feeding chickens, and transcribing entry-level talismans to earn three meals.

Before his master went into seclusion, he only carved twelve large characters on the stone wall: ”Guard the mountain for three years, do not descend, violators will be severely punished.”

After only half a year, Xuanyi felt like the rules and precepts had turned him into a dried salted fish who had lost his dreams.

He scratched his messy bun, planning to sneak off to the sunny large bluestone in the back mountain for another nap, but the corner of his eye caught sight of something unusual in the courtyard.

It was a palm-sized, tattered red cloth, lying alone on the dew-covered bluestone slab, its edges embroidered with four ancient seal characters that had long faded: Myriad Laws Street Stall.

”What is this?” Xuanyi frowned and walked closer.

The moment he approached, the red cloth moved without a breeze, gently unfurling.

On the cloth, three strange items appeared out of thin air, emitting a faint glow: a yellow talisman with curled edges, a small packet of emerald green beans tied with hemp rope, and a crystal-clear candy that seemed to contain starlight.

This sight was too bizarre; Xuanyi recoiled half a step, every hair on his body standing on end.

Before he could react, a cold, emotionless mechanical voice abruptly boomed in his mind:

”The myriad laws street vendor system has been activated, binding host: Zhang Xuanyi.”

”Newbie mission issued: Please complete your first transaction before sunset today.”

”Mission failure penalty: Stripping Daoist identity and expelling from Mount Longhu!”

Xuanyi’s head buzzed, and he was completely stunned.

System?

Street stall?

What is all this?

How could he, someone who cultivates immortality and seeks the Dao, encounter something only found in a web novel?

Stripping identity and expelling from Mount Longhu?

That would be worse than killing him with a sword!

He had grown up on the mountain since he was a child and wouldn’t even know where to find food if he went down the mountain.

Fear overwhelmed surprise, and his first reaction was to destroy this ominous object.

He abruptly stretched out his hand, a wisp of faint Daoist true fire igniting at his fingertips, ready to press down on the red cloth.

But just as his fingertips were about to touch the red cloth, the twelve large characters his master had carved on the stone wall before going into seclusion transformed into a brand, searing fiercely into his mind.

And below those twelve large characters, there was a line of small text he hadn’t paid much attention to at the time, but which now appeared chillingly clear: ”If the street stall appears, burn it quickly, remember!”

Xuanyi’s hand froze in mid-air.

Burning it was his master’s strict order.

But if he didn’t complete its mission, he would have to leave the mountain today.

One was an unknown, immense danger in his master’s words; the other was an imminent survival crisis.

Is this Dao Ancestor testing me?

His features twisted in dilemma, a heavenly and human battle raging in his heart.

Just then, the tattered cloth seemed to sense his hesitation and automatically displayed the information of the yellow photocopy paper.

A line of small characters, like ink and wash, appeared in the void above the talisman:

”Item: photocopy yellow paper”

”Effect: Can perfectly replicate talismans of any grade, including their spiritual energy trajectories and flaws.”

”Restriction: Each sheet can only be used three times.”

Xuanyi’s eyes instantly widened!

Perfect replication?

I copy those basic evil-dispelling talismans and mind-cleansing talismans every day until my hands cramp, and eight out of ten are duds. This thing... isn’t this a living photocopier?!

And it comes with a printing function!

His heart rate uncontrollably accelerated.

Reason told him this thing was evil and not to be touched.

But those four words, ”perfect replication,” were like the devil’s whispers, madly tempting him.

He tremblingly pulled out a discarded evil-dispelling talisman he had drawn from his Pregnant.

This talisman was his masterpiece from last night; the last stroke of the ”thunder” character, the talisman’s core, was drawn crooked, causing the entire talisman’s spiritual energy to become blocked, turning it into a piece of waste paper.

”Inject intent...” Following the prompt that appeared out of thin air in his mind, he focused a faint wisp of intent onto the photocopy yellow paper, silently thinking ”replicate.”

A miracle happened!

A flash of light appeared on the photocopy yellow paper, and a talisman identical to the discarded one in his hand materialized out of thin air, quietly suspended above the red cloth.

He looked closely, and even the crooked ”thunder” character was replicated with uncanny accuracy, not a single detail missed!

What shocked him even more was that this replicated talisman actually emanated a spiritual energy fluctuation, though not strong, it was genuine!

”Holy crap!” Xuanyi couldn’t help but blurt out a curse; this was beyond the scope of his understanding.

This was not a copier; this was simply a divine artifact that created something out of nothing!

Just as he was overwhelmed by this miracle, a violent and hurried coughing sound suddenly came from outside the courtyard, accompanied by the thudding of a cane hitting the ground.

”Cough cough... Daoist! Daoist Zhang!”

A figure stumbled into the small courtyard; it was Crippled Chen from the village down the mountain.

He clearly had a limp in one leg, yet he ran faster than a rabbit, his pant legs covered in mud and dew.

He tightly held a little girl, about five or six years old, in his arms. The girl’s eyes were closed, her face bluish-purple, her lips black, and her breathing so faint it was almost imperceptible.

”Daoist Zhang... help! Please save my daughter!” Crippled Chen fell to his knees with a thud, his voice hoarse and tearful, ”I don’t know what evil spirit she encountered; she suddenly had a high fever, spoke nonsense, and now... now she’s almost out of breath! Daoist Li from the mountain said she was possessed by Yin Sha, and she wouldn’t last past the third watch!”

Xuanyi’s brow furrowed; he could tell at a glance that the Yin Sha energy in the girl’s body had solidified, invading her heart pulse, truly a matter of life and death.

Crippled Chen, seeing his silence, was sweating profusely in anxiety. He fumbled in his Pregnant and pulled out a rusty bronze bell, offering it with both hands: ”Daoist, this is something passed down from my ancestors. I heard it was a token of the ’Bell Doctor’ lineage, folk cultivators from a hundred years ago. Although it’s not worth much money, it’s said to have the effect of warding off evil and resonating. I’ll trade it for a good evil-dispelling talisman from you. Please have mercy and save my daughter’s life!”

Xuanyi recognized the bronze bell.

The Tianshi Mansion’s ancient texts recorded that the ”Bell Doctor” lineage entered the Dao through music. This bronze bell was indeed their magical artifact, capable of resonating with evil spirits to provide warning and deterrence.

To ordinary people, it was an antique; to cultivators, it was also a decent little trinket.

Normally, he might have declined, as saving people consumed mental energy and could involve karma, which was troublesome.

But today, looking at Crippled Chen’s face, filled with despair, seeing his hands trembling violently from fear and exhaustion, and then looking at the dying little girl, the softest part of his heart was touched.

More importantly... the cold system prompt in his mind still seemed to echo.

Isn’t this the first transaction delivered right to his doorstep?

Almost instinctively, Xuanyi snatched the evil-dispelling talisman that had just been replicated and was still suspended on the red cloth, stuffing it into Crippled Chen’s hand.

”Take it, quickly stick it on her chest at the Danzhong acupoint, and don’t let her bite her tongue.” His tone was surprisingly steady, even to himself.

”Aye! Aye! Thank you, Daoist! Thank you, Daoist, for saving her life!” Crippled Chen was overjoyed, fumbling to stick the talisman on his daughter’s chest.

Strangely enough, as soon as the talisman was applied, it transformed into a faint golden light, instantly merging into the girl’s body.

The girl’s bluish-purple complexion began to recede at a visible rate, and her rapid breathing gradually stabilized.

Crippled Chen was incoherent with excitement, kowtowing three times to Xuanyi before rushing away with his daughter.

Silence returned to the courtyard, leaving only Xuanyi and the peculiar red cloth.

In less than the time it takes for an incense stick to burn, the cold mechanical voice sounded again:

”First transaction completed.”

”Reward: spirit coin × 10.”

”System experience + 100, upgraded to Lv.1, unlocking basic item display function.”

Xuanyi just breathed a sigh of relief, feeling that today’s events were both exciting and worthwhile.

He looked down at the tattered cloth, only to find it suddenly growing warm. A new line of small characters appeared on the phantom of the photocopy yellow paper: ”Remaining uses: 2/3.”

It really was a meticulous system.

He was pondering what these spirit coins were for and what the ”basic item display function” entailed when a steady, powerful footsteps suddenly came from outside the courtyard, approaching from afar.

”Zhang Xuanyi!”

A cold shout made Xuanyi’s heart leap to his throat.

With a guilty conscience, he kicked the red cloth on the ground into the pile of straw in the corner.

The courtyard gate was pushed open, and the guest-receiving Daoist, Li Songyang, entered with two enforcement disciples.

Li Songyang wore a dark blue Daoist robe, his face stern, his gaze as sharp as an eagle’s, sweeping over every corner of the courtyard.

”What anomaly is there in your courtyard?” Li Songyang’s voice was devoid of warmth.

Xuanyi quickly put on a playful smile and bowed: ”Senior Brother Li, you jest. Apart from the smell of chicken droppings, what anomaly could there be in my dilapidated courtyard? I, a junior Daoist of the Houtian realm, couldn’t possibly cause such a commotion, could I?”

Li Songyang’s gaze lingered on his face for a moment, then he said coldly: ”Stop being so glib with me. Just now, the Yin Sha energy within a ten-mile radius of the back mountain suddenly receded. Although the movement was small, it couldn’t escape the mountain-guarding formation. The final spiritual energy fluctuation traced was near you. Tell me, did you privately use a forbidden talisman?”

Xuanyi’s heart sank, secretly thinking it was bad.

He had forgotten that the Tianshi Mansion’s mountain-guarding formation was extremely sensitive to all spiritual energy fluctuations.

But his face remained impassive; he spread his hands, looking innocent: ”Senior Brother, you think too highly of me. I’ve never even seen such a thing as a forbidden talisman. Just now, it was Crippled Chen from the mountain. His daughter was possessed by an evil spirit, so I casually drew an evil-dispelling talisman for him and traded it for two steamed buns for breakfast. You know my talisman-drawing skills; nine out of ten are Waste. How could I cause such a big commotion?”

Li Songyang narrowed his eyes, staring intently at him, as if trying to see through him.

Xuanyi’s scalp tingled under his gaze, and a layer of cold sweat had already seeped onto his back.

After a long while, Li Songyang snorted coldly: ”It had better be so. Zhang Xuanyi, I don’t care how lazy you were before, but remember, you are now the mountain guardian! A mountain guardian must not tamper with external objects, must not engage in private transactions, and must not violate any prohibitions! If I find out you’ve done anything you shouldn’t have, don’t blame me for disregarding our fellow disciple relationship; I will cripple your cultivation and cast you down the mountain!”

Before his words finished, a chilling wind, without warning, poured in from the depths of the distant mountain forest, making the plants in the courtyard rustle and carrying a heart-palpitating coldness.

Li Songyang’s expression changed; he suddenly looked up in the direction from which the cold wind came, his expression grave.

And at this moment, the tattered red cloth that Xuanyi had kicked into the pile of straw silently became scorching hot, as if sensing some terrifying presence.

Xuanyi lowered his head, not daring to meet Li Songyang’s gaze, but his heart pounded as if it would leap out of his throat.

Because, in his mind, the cold system prompt was sounding, with an unprecedented sense of warning, word by word:

”Warning! High-level talisman qi fluctuation detected... Seal possibly loosening...”

”Target locked: Old Ancestor of Quanxing, Li Wujiu... is awakening!”

Night fell quietly, and the mountain wind grew colder.

Xuanyi squatted by the cold stove, holding a cold steamed bun that Crippled Chen had forced upon him during the day, but he couldn’t take a single bite.

His mind was in a jumble; one moment it was Li Songyang’s icy face, the next it was the little girl’s bluish-purple face, but more often, it was the tattered red cloth he had re-hidden under the straw, and that chilling prompt.

Old Ancestor of Quanxing... Li Wujiu.

Just hearing that name sent shivers down one’s spine.

He looked up at the inky black depths of the back mountain, as if he could see boundless darkness brewing and surging there.

And he, this lazy Daoist who only wanted to muddle through life, seemed to have been swept into a huge, inescapable vortex.

He looked down at his hands, then thought of that cursed red cloth again.

Was that thing a lifesaver or a death curse?