No Money to Cultivate Immortality?

Hearing Zhang Yu’s answer, a sharp gleam flickered in Black Crow’s eyes as he laughed. “Hahaha, if it’s Endless Spring and Autumn Meditation you’re teaching, that’s a top-tier body-refining Technique even many old-timers are eager to learn or brush up on.”

“Then let me wish you success in your trial lecture, Teacher Ma. May you become our gang’s next Gold-Tier Instructor.”

“Once you’re Gold-Tier, you’ll be teaching our most important, wealthiest clients—those with the highest spending power. Earning over a million a month after tax won’t be an issue at all.”

“Oh right, three other veteran teachers from the gang will also be doing trial lectures today…”

As he spoke, Black Crow led Zhang Yu to the classroom where the trial would be held.

Three gang teachers were already waiting outside. When they saw Black Crow and Zhang Yu approaching, they all gave them a few more glances, a flicker of puzzlement in their eyes.

One middle-aged woman asked curiously, “Black Crow, who’s this?”

“This is Teacher Ma Yunteng, also here for today’s trial lecture,” Black Crow introduced.

At his words, the three gang teachers all frowned slightly, and their gazes toward Zhang Yu turned colder, laced with hostility.

The middle-aged woman directly probed for Zhang Yu’s background. “I know all the teachers in the gang qualified to tutor at the peak of Qi Refinement. This Teacher Ma looks unfamiliar—has he just joined recently?”Black Crow smiled slightly and said, “Teacher Ma hasn’t been with us long. He used to teach Techniques at the construction sites. He’s been away the last few months due to personal reasons, so it’s normal if you don’t recognize him, Teacher Ci.”

Hearing he used to teach at construction sites, the trio’s eyes flashed with contempt.

After all, construction workers generally have low education levels, shallow Immortal Dao foundations, and due to years of taking low-grade drugs, their rate of mental disability is much higher than in other classes.

In terms of student quality, construction classes fall far below the senior classes, and their spending power is even worse.

So, teachers who instruct the construction classes are generally considered inferior in every way—strength, teaching skills, and mastery of Techniques.

Teacher Ci gave a slight nod and stopped paying Zhang Yu any attention. As far as she was concerned, her real competitors today were the other two veteran underground instructors.

Black Crow glanced at his phone. “The elders are all here already. They’re watching the classroom through the cameras.”

“Let me go greet the students first. Then we’ll begin the trial lectures.”

“We’ll follow the original order: Teacher Ci and the others first, then Teacher Ma. Sound good?”

Zhang Yu nodded, indicating no problem.

When Black Crow entered the classroom, he saw a dozen elderly people already waiting, some standing, some seated.

As all of them looked over together, their combined peak Qi Refinement pressure made even Black Crow pause, cold sweat forming on his brow.

He forced a smile. “Sorry to keep everyone waiting. We’ll begin shortly. Thank you all for making time—”

But before he could finish, a silver-haired elder with a stern face cut in coldly. “Black Crow, last time you brought in that Teacher Song, who only had a high school diploma. Didn’t even get into college, yet he dared to teach us.”

“The teachers you’ve arranged this time… they’re not that unreliable again, are they?”

Black Crow quickly soothed him. “Elder Wang, while Teacher Song only had a high school diploma, he had a wealth of teaching experience. A low degree doesn’t necessarily affect class quality—”

Elder Wang snorted. “Everyone in this room graduated from college. You think a high schooler can teach us? Can he even understand what he’s teaching?”

Black Crow wiped sweat from his forehead. He knew these college-graduate elders were the elite corporate warhorses who had studied, cultivated, and worked into old age. They were absolute education snobs—many of them probably questioned whether high school grads even deserved human rights.

Another elder chimed in. “Your Dark Studies Gang needs to get it together. Back in my company, resumes from high school grads didn’t even reach my desk. They’re not fit to teach anyone.”

Yet another added, “People who couldn’t even get into college? They’re society’s garbage. Evolutionary dead ends. Bound to be eliminated.”

“Exactly!” shouted an old woman, her hair standing on end. “If you can’t get into college, are you even a person?”

“No need to go that far,” Black Crow said hurriedly. “And I assure you, all of today’s instructors are college graduates.”

“Hmph.” Elder Wang snapped, “Then we want to see their diplomas. Only those with degrees deserve to teach here.”

Black Crow’s expression turned awkward. Most gang instructors kept their identities secret. No one wanted their records revealed, let alone show diplomas.

Truth was, he’d only said that to calm them down—he wasn’t even sure if all four of today’s instructors had graduated from college.

As a high school grad himself, Black Crow cursed silently: “These old geezers, none of them even see high schoolers as human.”

“Good high schools aren’t worse than bad colleges. Great high school grads can, through years of effort, become perfectly qualified instructors…”

Though grumbling internally, he dared not offend these important clients.

Just then, his phone buzzed. A message had come through from the gang elders observing via the camera feed.

Reading the contents, Black Crow relayed to the room, “Everyone, in the underground tutoring world, it’s customary not to reveal identities lightly. That’s the long-standing rule. Even our Dark Studies Gang must respect that.”

“However, your concerns are valid. How about this—we let one of you verify each instructor’s strength personally. What do you say?”

Elder Wang frowned. “How do you propose we verify it?”

Black Crow said, “Since today’s instructors are all teaching Body Refining, Elder Wang, why don’t you personally strike them three times? No blocking, no dodging—just take your blows head-on. If they can handle three of your attacks, surely they’re not just high school grads, right?”

The crowd nodded slightly. After all, high schoolers who failed to get into college had to work immediately upon graduation. They had neither the time, resources, nor knowledge to master advanced body-refining Techniques.

Only college students, who ascended to the Second Floor and spent a decade in university, could continue focused study and cultivate a wide range of Techniques.

Even at equal body strength levels, those with college educations far outperformed high school grads in practical ability thanks to multiple overlapping body-refining Techniques.

Elder Wang lifted his chin proudly. “Hmph. Useless trash who didn’t even go to college could never withstand three of my strikes.”

“I approve of this method.”

Black Crow knew Elder Wang held significant sway among the others. As expected, with his approval, the rest voiced no objections.

Black Crow stepped outside to explain the situation to the four instructors. The other three agreed confidently without hesitation.

Zhang Yu wasn’t sure how strong this Elder Wang actually was, but seeing no way around it, he agreed too.

However, that brief flicker of hesitation made Teacher Ci and the others look down on him even more. In their eyes, Zhang Yu’s reluctance confirmed he had only a high school education.

Teacher Ci, the middle-aged woman, was the first to enter the classroom.

When her turn to be tested came, she stood motionless as Elder Wang delivered three consecutive palm strikes to her shoulders and abdomen.

Three thunderous booms echoed as she staggered back five steps, her face flushing red—only to return to normal moments later.

Elder Wang nodded in approval. “Not bad. Peak-level physical strength, multiple protective body Techniques. Only a college graduate would reach this level.”

Relieved to be acknowledged, Teacher Ci began her lecture.

“Today, I’ll be teaching everyone how to poop.”

“Seems like a simple daily act, but there’s deep wisdom in it—matters of life and death.”

“Many years ago, a senior cultivator, after working nonstop for ten years, became so constipated from the stress that he spent half a year stuck on the toilet. There, he comprehended a new Technique: the Health-Preserving Technique.”

“That’s what I’ll be teaching today. Once mastered, it’ll purge toxins and impurities from the body every day…”

“In Body Refining, ten percent is training, thirty percent is diet, and the remaining ninety percent is all about how you inject supplements.”

“As the saying goes, ‘More needle marks on the arm, better exam results.’”

“But the more injections you get, the more you need to detox. Hence another saying: ‘A good student must squat with endurance…’”

“According to the latest research from Xiandu City, there’s a direct correlation between body-refinement performance and hemorrhoid incidence among students…”

Watching the elderly students listen intently, Teacher Ci’s spirits soared.

She thought, “For the sake of my nine children, to raise them well and help them all get into college and find jobs, I must become a Gold-Tier Instructor!”

Whenever she imagined her nine kids growing up, working hard to repay her parenting loans, transferring her money every month, Teacher Ci felt she was one step closer to a beautiful life where she no longer had to work overtime and could finally enjoy a mere twelve-hour workday.

…

Meanwhile, the classroom camera streamed Teacher Ci’s performance directly to the Dark Studies Gang elders gathered in the meeting room.

One elder commented, “Little Ci’s lesson lacks innovation. No hook.”

Another added, “Solid material, but cliché. Probably won’t have a high continuation rate.”

“Let’s see the next one.”

…

Outside the classroom, Zhang Yu listened to Teacher Ci’s lecture and thought to himself:

“Clear delivery, focused points, highly memorable, light and humorous, backed by the latest research… Her teaching is already on par with top-tier instructors at Elite High School.”

“The competition to become a Gold-Tier Instructor in the Dark Studies Gang is even fiercer than I imagined.”

“No, my prep still isn’t enough. I need to up the ante.”

“Her weakness is that the Health-Preserving Technique she’s teaching isn’t advanced enough.”

“I’ll need to highlight the advantages of Endless Spring and Autumn Meditation when it comes to supplements!”