I Became a Witch in a World Full of Urban Legends

“Name?”

“……”

“Age?”

“……”

After asking two questions in a row and seeing the dazed Fu Xinyi, the doctor finally gave up on questioning and turned to look at Lu Yibei, his gaze involuntarily lingering on her face.

He had been seeing patients here for several years and had met all kinds of people. It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say he’d seen countless faces, but he had never seen such a beautiful woman before-ethereal and otherworldly, yet alluring and seductive. The phrase “pure yet tempting” seemed tailor-made for her.

After taking several deep breaths, the doctor barely managed to collect himself. “Forget it. Family member, why don’t you answer for her?”

After speaking, he silently added in his heart, My teacher was right-women really do distract us from treating patients.

“Mm, no problem.” Lu Yibei nodded.

“Name?”“My name is Wang Xiaomei.”

“I’m asking about her!”

“Oh, oh, her name is Fu Xinyi, twenty years old, probably from Jiang City…”

In truth, Lu Yibei didn’t know where Fu Xinyi was from, but the professor who brought her to Tang City was from Jiang City University, so she just made something up.

The doctor looked at Fu Xinyi, then at Lu Yibei, and asked in surprise, “Probably? Aren’t you her sister?”

“Cousin, I’m her cousin. Our families haven’t been in touch for many years. We only reconnected because she came to Tang City for her internship. I’m not even sure if her family still lives at the same address.” Lu Yibei replied with a straight face.

The more lies she told, the more skilled she became. With a turn of thought, the words slipped out smoothly, her tone steady and her face calm, showing no sign of deceit.

“……” The doctor stared at Lu Yibei in silence for a few seconds, then continued, “Tell me, how did she get hurt?”

“She slipped.” Lu Yibei said, “You see, it’s been snowing for days, the roads are icy and slippery. She wasn’t careful and fell, hitting her head on the curb.”

On the way here, Lu Yibei had already checked Fu Xinyi’s injuries. She’d been knocked out by the blade of the Pure Lotus Sword, and the area struck was about the same as hitting the curb.

After hearing this, the doctor buried himself in the medical records for a while, then got up to check Fu Xinyi’s injuries. He sat back down, fiddled with the computer for a bit, stared at the MRI images on the screen, and frowned, his expression shifting several times.

That look… Could she have been hit dumb? Lu Yibei thought to herself, then tentatively asked in a low voice, “Doctor, is her condition very serious?”

The doctor shook his head, thought for a moment, and said, “It’s not a matter of serious or not. Her condition is quite special, you understand?”

“What do you mean by special?” Lu Yibei pressed.

“Hmm…” The doctor organized his words. “From the test results, aside from some bruising on her scalp, she only has a very mild concussion. But as you can see, she’s already showing severe confusion, which is a symptom that usually only appears with serious brain trauma…”

At this point, the doctor paused, glanced at the time in the lower right corner of the computer screen, and lowered his voice, “Tell me honestly, did she run into some kind of haunting?”

“In fact, in the past two days, the hospital has admitted many patients whose organs are normal but who show strange symptoms.”

Among the patients admitted, there was even a man in his seventies who, with all his organs functioning normally, developed pregnancy symptoms and a surge in pregnancy hormones. The doctor grumbled inwardly.

It was precisely because of these people with strange illnesses that the doctors and nurses in the hospital couldn’t help but gossip in private, saying that some haunting incident had occurred in Tang City, and those affected by the haunting had contracted some kind of Nocturnal Syndrome.

After seeing Fu Xinyi’s test results, the doctor immediately connected her case with those previous patients.

“No!” Lu Yibei denied without hesitation. “I was with her the whole time before she got hurt, and I didn’t notice anything strange!”

“Hmm…” The doctor pondered for a few seconds, sighed, and said, “Then, just like with the other patients, let’s keep her under observation for a while before making a diagnosis.”

Lu Yibei, “……”

So many patients with strange illnesses in just a few days?

It was very likely the lingering psychic energy fluctuation left behind by Suolang Baima and Ms. Rabbit’s group during the assassination attempt on that pesky little sister. Lu Yibei thought, frowning slightly.

Residual psychic energy fluctuation of excessive intensity does indeed carry a high risk of causing psychic maladaptation symptoms in ordinary people, and in severe cases, can even lead to Nocturnal Syndrome.

Although after the incident, the three operators from The Midnight Watchers Society in Tang City immediately began cleanup efforts to minimize the harm as much as possible, those psychic energy fluctuations lingered in the city for more than five hours, so inevitably some ordinary people were affected.

But…

What’s going on with Fu Xinyi?

She’s a psychic herself, so she shouldn’t be affected by the residual psychic energy fluctuations. The hospital’s examination results also showed she wasn’t injured…

She just got tapped by the Pure Lotus Sword’s coat and ended up like this. Could it be… the Pure Lotus Sword has some special ability I don’t know about?

Lu Yibei pondered, secretly deciding to ask the Ancestors about it later, then looked at the doctor.

“We can only do this for now. Let her stay here for observation. Doctor, I’ll go pay her fees.”

“Wait!” Lu Yibei had just stood up to leave when the doctor stopped her.

Lu Yibei turned around, looking at the doctor in confusion, tilting her head. “Doctor, is there something else?”

The doctor blushed, stammering, “Miss Wang, c-could I get your contact info? M-maybe we could have dinner together sometime?”

The moment Lu Yibei stood up, he had a feeling that he might never meet such a heart-stirring girl again. If he missed this chance, there’d be no next time.

Lu Yibei, “…”

Damn! Doctor, what are you doing, doctor?

I get it-even if I have a charm ability, ordinary people might be slightly affected, but dear, that’s not love!

Still, that said… free food is free food. Freeloading feels great, and freeloading forever feels even better!

Lu Yibei thought, silently took out her phone, and showed her QR code.

–

After settling Fu Xinyi for the time being, Lu Yibei left the hospital, got into a taxi back to the Four Seasons Hotel in Tang City, unlocked her phone, and stared at the friend request on WeChat, falling into deep thought.

This is so weird, what the hell. Free meals are nice, but in the past, not to mention one meal, even a hundred… uh, a hundred is too much, that’s actually hard to refuse, ten meals is better.

Even ten meals, I wouldn’t be moved!

What’s up with me today?

Lu Yibei thought, pulled herself together, and decisively rejected the doctor’s friend request.

Outside the car window, light snow drifted down, the city scenery flashed by, and on a night like this, someone was bound to be heartbroken.

–

Back at the hotel, Lu Yibei immediately logged into her social app, clicked on a friend with a yellow profile photo, and sent a message.

Wang Buliuxing poked Online Pervert 0’s little face.

Wang Buliuxing: “You there? Got something to ask you!”

After a few seconds, the solid yellow avatar bounced a few times and replied.

Online Pervert 0: “I’m here [shy], finally you show up! Our boss got totally screwed over by you!”

Lu Yibei, “???”

What the heck? What’s going on? I haven’t met up with the Void in ages, are you trying to scam me?

Wang Buliuxing: “Don’t talk nonsense, how did I screw it over?”

Online Pervert 0: “Did you fight the Eldritch Destroyer? And win?”

Wang Buliuxing: “From a certain point of view, yes.”

She did fight it, and although she used some unconventional means, she did win. But what does that have to do with the Void? Lu Yibei wondered.

Online Pervert 0: “Didn’t I tell you before, our boss tried to hunt the Eldritch Destroyer like you did, and succeeded?”

Wang Buliuxing: “I think you did mention that? [guilty]”

Online Pervert 0: “But did you know, the core entity of the Eldritch Destroyer’s haunting is toxic? Our boss almost got poisoned to death!”

Lu Yibei, “…”

It clearly didn’t understand the situation and insisted on courting death. That’s not my fault!

It’s not like I pried open its mouth and forced it to swallow.

But…

Wang Buliuxing: “What happened? Tell me in detail. What’s wrong with it? Did it get tainted by the world’s malice? Is it already crispy like chicken and added to KFC’s deluxe lunch?”

Although she’d never admit that the Void nearly got itself killed and it had anything to do with her, she was still very interested in the fact that the core entity of the Eldritch Destroyer’s haunting was “toxic.”

After sending the message to Online Pervert 0, Lu Yibei waited for quite a while. Just as she was getting impatient and about to send another message to follow up, she finally got a reply.

Who knows, maybe they went to consult the Void.

Online Pervert 0: “It’s got nothing to do with the world’s malice. Our boss can easily withstand cyberbullying and even fight back with cyberbullying. Why would it be afraid of a little bit of the world’s malice?”

Wang Buliuxing: “Damn…”

Online Pervert 00: “You should know that hauntings have a time limit, right?”

In the dimly lit hotel room, Lu Yibei looked at her phone screen, frowning slightly.

Gou Meng had told her about this a long time ago. According to Gou Meng, the maximum lifespan of a haunting is five thousand years. During those five thousand years, a haunting’s power is influenced by various factors, constantly changing, constantly corrupting and falling. Even gods die after five thousand years.

Lu Yibei had also found this view confirmed in The Midnight Tome. In fact, according to The Midnight Tome, most hauntings last only about two hundred years, much less than the five thousand years Gou Meng mentioned.

The Eldritch Destroyers, though once the factors that destroyed the world, are still hauntings. Their existence should also follow this rule. Even if they aren’t dead yet, a large portion of their core entities have probably already been corrupted beyond recognition.

Could it be that the Void’s devouring of the Eldritch Destroyers’ core entities is also related to this rule?

Wouldn’t that make it a world-class secret?

As Lu Yibei pondered this, she saw the “The other party is typing…” prompt above the chat box and hurried to send a message before the Online Old Pervert could reply.

Her hand speed was worthy of her nineteen years of singlehood, making even the internet-born psychic, the Online Old Pervert, break out in a cold sweat. No wonder he almost became a keyboard warrior.

Wang Buliuxing: “Wait, what you’re about to say next, does it involve some kind of world-class secret? If that’s the case, you’d better not say it.”

The more you know about some things, the deeper you get, the more dangerous your situation becomes.

Don’t give me any crap about seeking the truth of the world-I have no such dream!

After all, if people don’t have dreams, how are they any different from living without a care? Lu Yibei thought.

Online Pervert 00: “As expected of you! But it’s not as scary as you think. Knowing it shouldn’t matter.”

Lu Yibei looked at her phone screen, hesitated for a moment, and replied, “Then go ahead and tell me?”

Online Pervert 00: “Alright, this is a long story, let me organize my thoughts.”

Online Pervert 00: “At first, our boss followed your example and went hunting for an Eldritch Destroyer. Actually, there was a target. After thorough investigation, he chose an Eldritch Destroyer whose power was somewhat similar to his own.”

“…”

An Eldritch Destroyer with a power similar to the Void? What kind of haunting could be similar to that? A rumor-mongering haunting? Lu Yibei wondered.

Online Pervert 00: “The original plan was, after completing the hunt, to devour the core entity of an Eldritch Destroyer with a similar power, in order to repair his own haunting’s core entity. But after the devouring, he discovered something terrifying.”

Wang Buliuxing: “Something terrifying?”

Online Pervert 00: “Setting aside the malice of the world, our boss found that his existence was strongly affected-in simple terms, his lifespan was shortened! Fortunately, he discovered it early enough to fix it. He’s already formatted his haunting’s core entity and is reinstalling his systems.”

Lu Yibei, “???”

What the hell is that!

You can format a haunting’s core entity and reinstall systems?

What kind of haunting core entity is that? Can I get one too?

Online Pervert 00: “He asked me to remind you, if you devour the core entity of an Eldritch Destroyer, you’d better expel their power from your body as soon as possible. If you fully merge with it, it’ll be too late.”

Lu Yibei, “…”

I’d like to, but I can’t format my own haunting’s core entity!

If I really had that ability, I’d have formatted all the witch types and mythical types long ago, and gone looking for a macho ‘system’ to install. Lu Yibei thought.

Wang Buliuxing: “Thanks for letting me know, but I actually came to you for something else today.”

Online Pervert 00: “What is it?”

Wang Buliuxing: “Help me check if Gou Meng has been up to anything weird lately?”

Online Pervert 00: “Oh, I know you’re in Tang City now. Our informants have already reported it. But why are you investigating her? She’s almost dead anyway.”

Lu Yibei, “???”

Almost dead… what does that mean? She was just lively and energetic a moment ago!